Anger Towards Women

[Orb]

@Blessed2 I like this advice, thank you.

 

@Phil @Mandy nipples are cool 👍.

[Orb]

Last night I had a dream of a positive interaction with a girl, it was nice, the transmutation is working. 

[Phil]

@Orb

Awesome to hear. 🙏🤍

[Joseph Maynor]

At the highest level of Marriage the Masculine protects the Feminine and the Feminine protects the masculine through thick and thin.  And it couldn't be otherwise.

[Kevin]

On 3/21/2023 at 8:54 AM, Orb said:

When I stop watching porn and mastubrating, I'm often shocked by the hatred and irritation that comes up. 

 

It feels like being starved yet not being able to satisfy the hunger. My balls are filling up with rage every day. 

 

Since i was in highschool i argued with girls a lot and never had much luck dating them, i was often rejected. 

 

I often missed signals girls would give me when they liked me or I would notice but not feel worthy enough to follow through. 

 

Some girls did like me though and I should've dated them, I was just picky. Or my social skills were so poopy it would fuck everything up. 

 

I was at a supermarket and I saw this girl who was so hot at the cash register. And I was so upset like fuck why can't I have sex with her! 😡

 

Why do I gotta see pretty women that I can't fuck? 

 

If you're a girl and you're reading this, I'm just venting, this is necessary to express in order to heal, so please do not take this the wrong way. 

 

I will express how I feel about women honestly so that I can learn to be kind to them.

Hey man I wanna start by saying I can totally relate. One thing that really helps is just going up to more girls and talking them. It’s a numbers game so if you talk to enough girls eventually it’s gonna work out for you. Especially if you’re in a good mood and you feel good about yourself that will come through. You’ll probably meet a girl in no time.

 

However just going to talk to girls you don’t know can be hard especially when you have these resentments and anger towards woman. That is more of an inward kind of thing. If you resolve that then it becomes much easier. All the stuff mentioned on this website helps with that. Meditation, journaling, and letting go of the discordant thoughts.

 

Close to a year ago I was in a much worse place emotionally than I am now. I hadn’t had a girlfriend of even hooked with a girl in a long time. Probably close to a year. I kept thinking I needed a girlfriend and that would fix everything. I had a call with Phil where he told me something that really put things in perspective and I hope it helps you. Basically I was complaining that I was sad all the time and I needed a girlfriend to fix things. Phil said something along the lines of the world is a mirror and you need to stop brushing your hair that you see on the mirror. You need to brush your real hair and then the mirror will follow that.

he said he more eloquently then that but you should get what’s trying to be said.

 

Also just my opinion here but I’d say cut out porn. Try a month of not watching porn and maybe only jack off once or twice a week. I think that will change your mindset a lot. I don’t understand the why or the science behind it but I notice that when I don’t watch porn and I don’t jack off as much it really helps me connect with girls.

[Kevin]

On 3/21/2023 at 10:11 AM, Orb said:

@Mandy I hate that they did dumb shit just for attention and approval. I hate that they made people like me feel lonely, depressed, suicidal because of their stupid judgement.

 

but i did dumb shit too when i was younger. 

 

i hate that women do dumb shit now. I hate that i have to go to night clubs and listen to bad music to get a girlfriend.

 

 

Mods idk if I’m breaking rules here but if I am just delete my post. 
 

@Orbif you don’t mind me asking, what city do you live?

As for nightclubs with shitty music I’d recommend going to a nightclub that plays techno or edm and take mdma. I’m positive you’d have a life changing experience. I’d say go with at least one friend just in case you roll to hard they can take care of you.

 

Also you don’t have to go to nightclubs or bars to meet girls. It helps for sure because I feel like everyone goes out to clubs to meet people. But if you see a pretty girl at the gym or the grocery store or just while you’re out and about you can talk to her. There’s no rules against doing that, although growing up I always thought there was.

[Kevin]

23 hours ago, Rose said:

 What a sad and noble story *yawn*

This is mad disrespectful. If you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all.

[Kevin]

21 hours ago, Orb said:

@Lester Retsel but I've listened to many female musicians already, I feel like I'm being put into a box and I don't appreciate it. 

Appreciation is natural when the discordant beliefs are let go. You don’t need to listen to Taylor swift or the call her daddy podcast to appreciate women.

[Mandy]

Sometimes I wonder if part of the reason there's so much trouble with men finding the right woman or vice versa is because we tell kids and teenagers that they aren't smart enough to pick a partner or trust themselves to know what they like yet. Continue practicing that belief, and when does it switch on that suddenly you do trust yourself to know and feel what's right? People who meet and get to know each other before dating often aren't matched up in subjective levels of attraction, with clubs and apps people typically will be, because they try to match up with what they think they are, which causes all kinds of overthinking that kills any chemistry, serendipity or romance. In the pursuit of having it LOOK like that for others, as if we are movie actors, we sell out the feeling of it. We tell kids that if they fall in love too soon that they will "grow apart" in an excuse to not really work on the relationship or allow it to be a catalyst for growth itself but to subtly think they are superior to their partner and leave. The idea of value, worth and being too good or not good enough is such a barrier to connection. And sex. And as a pattern of thought it seems to only get stronger as people age, unless they recognize it. Why wouldn't that make anyone mad? 😂

[Mandy]

17 minutes ago, DMT Elf said:

Lol, this doesn’t describe my experience. I’ve known girls to be constantly horny. So horny that I can’t even keep up with how much sex they want to have. I’ve been in relationships where I started getting sick of my girlfriend for constantly wanting to fuck me.

Crap, I stopped my rant midway through, but now it seems it was meant to be. I was just saying that perhaps, for that thought experiment, the intensity that an early 20's male feels is only felt one day a month and that the "not feeling it" kind of rejection wouldn't be personal at all. Not a rule or a generalization. Also remember being in my early 20's and feeling very bored, insecure and out of place and being insatiable because of emotional something-is-missing reasons rather than healthy desire.  

 

While I'm in rant mode, men say they want women with high libido, yet also the perfect bikini body with a bodyfat below optimal levels to support ovulation and healthy libido, and oh, she should be taking birth control pills too for my convenience. Byee... libido. But there's another option... 🙂

 

 

[Jonas Long]

15 minutes ago, Mandy said:

 

While I'm in rant mode, men say they want women with high libido, yet also the perfect bikini body with a bodyfat below optimal levels to support ovulation and healthy libido, and oh, she should be taking birth control pills too for my convenience. Byee... libido. But there's another option... 🙂

 

Or, maybe that's an assumption about what "men want" that is equally over- generalized as the complaints being made here about "how women are"

[Mandy]

@Lester Retsel Yeah, it totally is. It's just what I spent my whole life assuming, but I was raised in the age of Victoria Secret models being stick skinny and world famous. The more time I spent worrying about my appearance the less attractive or attracted I became to the opposite sex or my partner. But instead of noticing that, I just thought it was because I still wasn't pretty enough. Also to be honest, my partner is pretty damn awesome and never pressured me to be any weight or look anyway, I did it all myself. 🙂 

 

It's just the gun standoff thing again. You can't wait for men to change, or women to change, or society to change or Victoria's Secret to change, or your face to change, or your ass to change to love yourself. 

 

 

 

 

[Orb]

 

1 hour ago, Kevin said:

Hey man I wanna start by saying I can totally relate. One thing that really helps is just going up to more girls and talking them. It’s a numbers game so if you talk to enough girls eventually it’s gonna work out for you. Especially if you’re in a good mood and you feel good about yourself that will come through. You’ll probably meet a girl in no time.

 

However just going to talk to girls you don’t know can be hard especially when you have these resentments and anger towards woman. That is more of an inward kind of thing. If you resolve that then it becomes much easier. All the stuff mentioned on this website helps with that. Meditation, journaling, and letting go of the discordant thoughts.

 

Close to a year ago I was in a much worse place emotionally than I am now. I hadn’t had a girlfriend of even hooked with a girl in a long time. Probably close to a year. I kept thinking I needed a girlfriend and that would fix everything. I had a call with Phil where he told me something that really put things in perspective and I hope it helps you. Basically I was complaining that I was sad all the time and I needed a girlfriend to fix things. Phil said something along the lines of the world is a mirror and you need to stop brushing your hair that you see on the mirror. You need to brush your real hair and then the mirror will follow that.

he said he more eloquently then that but you should get what’s trying to be said.

 

Also just my opinion here but I’d say cut out porn. Try a month of not watching porn and maybe only jack off once or twice a week. I think that will change your mindset a lot. I don’t understand the why or the science behind it but I notice that when I don’t watch porn and I don’t jack off as much it really helps me connect with girls.

Yea I'm finding a healthy rhythm to masturbate. Maybe I'm alone here but it's clear that any form of ejaculation causes a decline in energy levels. It should be obvious lol, we're literally shooting out nutrients that create life (bro science!). Like rn my energy levels have declined a bit, but also on the other hand when I don't masturbate at all for a while I become too alert and begin to experience agitation. 

And yea I feel in tune with a girl way more when I don't masturbate or watch porn for a while. 

 

Also I'm in FL but in the more mellow parts, I don't enjoy nightclubs much, it reminds me of the "crowd" of popular people in highschool that I never fit into, a bunch of bros and hoes no offense. 

 

I've been curious about MDMA but I will not be trying it bc I've read that you can only use it once, bc using it too much can damage the brains ability to create serotonin, sounds fun though!

 

I'll also add that I am feeling more confident as I workout more and stretch.

 

1 hour ago, Kevin said:

Appreciation is natural when the discordant beliefs are let go. You don’t need to listen to Taylor swift or the call her daddy podcast to appreciate women.

Yea I was frustrated when I was asked to listen to female artists but I understand that through forum posts its hard for people to get to know me through typed out sentences, so by the way my OP looked it may have seemed like I only appreciate male art lol, which is far from the truth, I've appreciated female forms of art all my life.

[Orb]

@Mandy old American culture is so strange to me lol, super skinny women were seen as the ideal look back them. Which is ABSURD! 

 

ive been attracted to girls with all kinds of body types though lol. There are some chunky women that look amazing. 

[Mandy]

@Orb Black panties? 

 

Is it the same way when you're with em'? 

[Jonas Long]

5 minutes ago, Orb said:

 

Yea I'm finding a healthy rhythm to masturbate. Maybe I'm alone here but it's clear that any form of ejaculation causes a decline in energy levels. It should be obvious lol, we're literally shooting out nutrients that create life (bro science!). Like rn my energy levels have declined a bit, but also on the other hand when I don't masturbate at all for a while I become too alert and begin to experience agitation. 

And yea I feel in tune with a girl way more when I don't masturbate or watch porn for a while. 

 

Also I'm in FL but in the more mellow parts, I don't enjoy nightclubs much, it reminds me of the "crowd" of popular people in highschool that I never fit into, a bunch of bros and hoes no offense. 

 

I've been curious about MDMA but I will not be trying it bc I've read that you can only use it once, bc using it too much can damage the brains ability to create serotonin, sounds fun though!

 

I'll also add that I am feeling more confident as I workout more and stretch.

 

Yea I was frustrated when I was asked to listen to female artists but I understand that through forum posts its hard for people to get to know me through typed out sentences, so by the way my OP looked it may have seemed like I only appreciate male art lol, which is far from the truth, I've appreciated female forms of art all my life.

You seemed by your own admission to be having a hard time humanizing women.  That was just one suggestion about how you can do this.  

[Orb]

@Mandy what do mean is it the same way? Like if I'm just as attracted? If so yes. Not all of em though, sometimes there regret lol. 

 

4 minutes ago, Lester Retsel said:

You seemed by your own admission to be having a hard time humanizing women.  That was just one suggestion about how you can do this.  

I get it, what I meant by not humanizing them was wanting purely just sex from women that I hung out with, it didn't mean I completely don't listen to female spiritual teachers or appreciate female artists. But I do get how it's difficult for you to know the full range of who I am through a couple thread posts.

[Mandy]

2 minutes ago, Orb said:

@Mandy what do mean is it the same way? Like if I'm just as attracted? If so yes. Not all of em though, sometimes there regret lol. 

Why is there regret though, and why are we laughing it off? 

 

Does it make sense that someone who wasn't very focused on what they wanted, but definitely didn't want to be regretted or to regret would be better off just saying no in the first place? 

[Orb]

4 minutes ago, Mandy said:

Why is there regret though, and why are we laughing it off? 

Sometimes I met some girls who I didn't resonate with personality wise and regretted the experience. 

 

4 minutes ago, Mandy said:

Does it make sense that someone who wasn't very focused on what they wanted, but definitely didn't want to be regretted or to regret would be better off just saying no in the first place? 

Guys do dumb shit when they're horny, there's no way to go around this, sorry. 

 

It's similar to me expecting women to always be horny, I'm just not a woman, and will never know how it feels to go through the fluctuations of being or not being horny as a woman, and that's okay.

 

And also the regret is exactly what I wanted! Bc it tells me more and more of what I reeeeaaaallly want.

Edited March 22, 2023 by Orb

[Mandy]

@Orb Was it really just personality though?

 

You go through fluctuations too. Watch and appreciate. The story that you're always horny is false. 

 

No, Source does not regret, you do it. It's worth looking into. It's the hit of whatever when I've sworn off it, why did I regret it, what momentum did I have going that made me think I needed a hit? What can I do to get ahead of the need that isn't really what I desire? Why do I mistake needs for desires when I don't even need the needs?