Anger Towards Women

[Orb]

@Mandy I'm not always horny, maybe for like a few hours a day sex doesn't come into my mind but I'm damn sure the frequency is still high, and is common among males.

 

9 minutes ago, Mandy said:

@Orb Was it really just personality though?

Actually, I'd say everything didn't resonate including personality. Although I don't see the relevance in pointing this out.

Edited March 22, 2023 by Orb

[Orb]

8 minutes ago, DMT Elf said:

idk, I do want all of that, and I've had all of it. The hot bikini body, the high libido, and birth control. It was awesome.

Then again, I don't judge women even slightly for all the high standards they hold men to.

That's nice, I find it's very maturing when you start to accept the female-male dynamic completely as it is now. 

 

Women hold men to a high standard, Men women to a high standard, what's wrong with that? 

[Orb]

Also, I always forget about dating apps lol, what a relief. If I put some elbow grease into my profile I can have success finding a gf.

[Orb]

@DMT Elf yea that's so true. I gotta keep myself in check next time I'm about to complain about what women want lol.

[Kevin]

1 hour ago, Orb said:

 

Yea I'm finding a healthy rhythm to masturbate. Maybe I'm alone here but it's clear that any form of ejaculation causes a decline in energy levels. It should be obvious lol, we're literally shooting out nutrients that create life (bro science!). Like rn my energy levels have declined a bit, but also on the other hand when I don't masturbate at all for a while I become too alert and begin to experience agitation. 

And yea I feel in tune with a girl way more when I don't masturbate or watch porn for a while. 

 

Yeah man I don’t understand it but there’s definitely a huge difference between fucking a girl and jacking off. When I fuck I feel comfortable, relaxed, I guess it feels like love. If I just jack off I feel lazy and sometimes even sad afterwards.

 

just my 2 cents but that agitation you feel might be best directed at something your passionate about. Especially something physical. For me Brazilian jiu jitsu is really good for transmuting that energy. I’m sure boxing, running, biking or anything else like that would help a lot. Even something creative like writing or painting or making music.

1 hour ago, Orb said:

Also I'm in FL but in the more mellow parts, I don't enjoy nightclubs much, it reminds me of the "crowd" of popular people in highschool that I never fit into, a bunch of bros and hoes no offense. 

 

I used to totally relate to feeling that way too about clubs and parties. I’m sure Mandy or Phil could explain what I’m trying to say a lot better but basically there might be some resentment surrounding not being included or not being the “popular” kid. If that’s let go a little bit then it starts to seem like all these people might go out to clubs to connect and have fun. I just think that maybe don’t limit yourself there. You can meet amazing people out.

 

but don’t trip because even if you never enjoy going out there are girls everywhere.

 

1 hour ago, Orb said:

I've been curious about MDMA but I will not be trying it bc I've read that you can only use it once, bc using it too much can damage the brains ability to create serotonin, sounds fun though!

 

I'll also add that I am feeling more confident as I workout more and stretch.

 

 

awesome man. Working out always does the trick for me. Try a sauna or steam room too. Those are great

1 hour ago, Orb said:

Yea I was frustrated when I was asked to listen to female artists but I understand that through forum posts its hard for people to get to know me through typed out sentences, so by the way my OP looked it may have seemed like I only appreciate male art lol, which is far from the truth, I've appreciated female forms of art all my life.

 

[Phil]

On 3/21/2023 at 11:54 AM, Orb said:

I was at a supermarket and I saw this girl who was so hot at the cash register. And I was so upset like fuck why can't I have sex with her! 😡

How do you know that’s true though? Did you talk to her, strike up a convo, ask her out etc?

What happened?

 

And just how honest are you being really (with yourself so to speak)?

Seems to me that there’s a whole lot of ‘knowing’ which doesn’t resonate… knowing that the hatred & irritation are related to porn & masturbation… knowing rage is ‘in the balls’ / related to sex… knowing you were rejected… knowing you’re not worthy enough… knowing that unworthiness is a feeling or is how you feel… knowing your social skills are poopy… even knowing this is necessary to express to heal. 

 

It sticks out to me that in the expressing… discouragement & disappointment are  overlooked. It’s disappointing & discouraging as fuck isn’t it so? What you really want is to get out of your own way and get on team yourself isn’t it? 

 

Blame seems to be overlooked too. There’s sooooo much clarity in blame… cause the beliefs getting in your way aren’t your fault. 

 

Imo it’s way better to get stung than to live in fear of bees. 

It’s way better to ‘get rejected’ as it were, than to feel discouragement & disappointment over & over without receiving the message. 

[Orb]

19 minutes ago, Phil said:

How do you know that’s true though? Did you talk to her, strike up a convo, ask her out etc?

What happened?

I was with my mom. And also, I wouldn't know what to say. If I was really honest I'd say I think she's beautiful and I'd like her number so we can chat sometime and get to know each other, but idk if she'd appreciate that, maybe she hears that all the time. 

 

Blame has already been expressed. 

 

Also it seems one emotion can be expressed indefinitely. Like I expressed blame yesterday, now I'm expressing it today. It doesn't seem to just leave permanently.

 

I'm not used to the words disappointing/discouraging in my vocabulary so it never occurs to me. I guess what you say is true, it was disappointing to not make a move.

[Orb]

@Kevin yea you're right, people clubbing are just looking to have a good time and get together.

[Rose]

12 hours ago, Kevin said:

This is mad disrespectful. If you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all.

Is that what your mommy taught you? 

[WhiteOwl]

On 3/21/2023 at 9:40 PM, Rose said:

The sooner you’ll accept you’re a bottom feeder, instead of thinking you’re the king, the better it will be for you. Because you’ll start working harder not to be the bottom feeder, instead of living in the illusion of how great you are.

😂 I am starting to like you Rose

[WhiteOwl]

@OrbAnd great thread, your willingness to express and look at your stuff is admirable 💢

[Orb]

@Roseyou should watch the horror movie called Smile. 

 

It's about a demon that feeds on trauma and the main characters name is Rose 🙂.

 

I noticed a funny synchronicity, I've been healing trauma and one of my new favorite horror movies (Smile) is about a demon who feeds on trauma, and Rose(the main character) is representative of someone going through the trauma process. 

 

Horror movies are very symbolic. 

Edited March 23, 2023 by Orb

[Orb]

@WhiteOwl thanks! 

[Phil]

16 hours ago, Orb said:

I was with my mom. And also, I wouldn't know what to say. If I was really honest I'd say I think she's beautiful and I'd like her number so we can chat sometime and get to know each other, but idk if she'd appreciate that, maybe she hears that all the time. 

 

Blame has already been expressed. 

 

Also it seems one emotion can be expressed indefinitely. Like I expressed blame yesterday, now I'm expressing it today. It doesn't seem to just leave permanently.

 

I'm not used to the words disappointing/discouraging in my vocabulary so it never occurs to me. I guess what you say is true, it was disappointing to not make a move.

 

On 3/21/2023 at 11:54 AM, Orb said:

When I stop watching porn and mastubrating, I'm often shocked by the hatred and irritation that comes up. 

 

It feels like being starved yet not being able to satisfy the hunger. My balls are filling up with rage every day. 

 

Since i was in highschool i argued with girls a lot and never had much luck dating them, i was often rejected. 

 

I often missed signals girls would give me when they liked me or I would notice but not feel worthy enough to follow through. 

 

Some girls did like me though and I should've dated them, I was just picky. Or my social skills were so poopy it would fuck everything up. 

 

I was at a supermarket and I saw this girl who was so hot at the cash register. And I was so upset like fuck why can't I have sex with her! 😡

 

Why do I gotta see pretty women that I can't fuck? 

 

If you're a girl and you're reading this, I'm just venting, this is necessary to express in order to heal, so please do not take this the wrong way. 

 

I will express how I feel about women honestly so that I can learn to be kind to them.

The difference in interpretation & suffering is so apparent, yet so great, that it’s virtually impossible to put into words. 

[Orb]

@Phil what do you mean? 

[Phil]

8 minutes ago, Orb said:

@Phil what do you mean? 

 

On 3/21/2023 at 11:54 AM, Orb said:

When I stop watching porn and mastubrating, I'm often shocked by the hatred and irritation that comes up. 

 

It feels like being starved yet not being able to satisfy the hunger. My balls are filling up with rage every day. 

 

Since i was in highschool i argued with girls a lot and never had much luck dating them, i was often rejected. 

 

I often missed signals girls would give me when they liked me or I would notice but not feel worthy enough to follow through. 

 

Some girls did like me though and I should've dated them, I was just picky. Or my social skills were so poopy it would fuck everything up. 

 

I was at a supermarket and I saw this girl who was so hot at the cash register. And I was so upset like fuck why can't I have sex with her! 😡

 

Why do I gotta see pretty women that I can't fuck? 

 

If you're a girl and you're reading this, I'm just venting, this is necessary to express in order to heal, so please do not take this the wrong way. 

 

I will express how I feel about women honestly so that I can learn to be kind to them.

An interpretation without the discord might sound like ‘man there was a girl I was really attracted to at the store but I was with my mom at the time so I’m gonna stop back up there tomorrow. Who knows, maybe we’ll go out and hook up’. 

[Orb]

6 minutes ago, Phil said:

 

An interpretation without the discord might sound like ‘man there was a girl I was really attracted to at the store but I was with my mom at the time so I’m gonna stop back up there tomorrow. Who knows, maybe we’ll go out and hook up’. 

Oh okay, thanks for clearing that up 🙂 , I like that free flowing attitude. I'm feeling that today, feels nice and loose. 

[Phil]

1 hour ago, Orb said:

Oh okay, thanks for clearing that up 🙂 , I like that free flowing attitude. I'm feeling that today, feels nice and loose. 

It’s just this 👇 without (separate) self referential thoughts. (Beliefs.)

On 3/21/2023 at 11:54 AM, Orb said:

When I stop watching porn and mastubrating, I'm often shocked by the hatred and irritation that comes up. 

 

It feels like being starved yet not being able to satisfy the hunger. My balls are filling up with rage every day. 

 

Since i was in highschool i argued with girls a lot and never had much luck dating them, i was often rejected. 

 

I often missed signals girls would give me when they liked me or I would notice but not feel worthy enough to follow through. 

 

Some girls did like me though and I should've dated them, I was just picky. Or my social skills were so poopy it would fuck everything up. 

 

I was at a supermarket and I saw this girl who was so hot at the cash register. And I was so upset like fuck why can't I have sex with her! 😡

 

Why do I gotta see pretty women that I can't fuck? 

 

If you're a girl and you're reading this, I'm just venting, this is necessary to express in order to heal, so please do not take this the wrong way. 

 

I will express how I feel about women honestly so that I can learn to be kind to them.

 

[Orb]

@Phil

 

Okay so a better version would be:

 

I'm horny and full of energy and some irritation comes up! But that's okay I can find different activities that will help express this energy. Deep down I see the how fruitless it is to expect my happiness to come from the actions of hot girls.

[Kevin]

11 hours ago, Rose said:

Is that what your mommy taught you? 

Lmao my mom actually did used to say that. Maybe if your father loved you then you wouldn’t be so toxic towards men.