Rose

I remember a while ago hearing that “women usually date up on an economic level”. This made me realize that men usually date up on a spiritual level. If women in general are looking for a man who can provide better than they themselves can, a man would be doing the same but on a spiritual level - looking for kindness, acceptance, compassion - qualities that are more biologically programmed into women, as future mothers. I am generalizing of course here, there is a feminine and masculine that lives in both of us. It’s a big realization for me because I often find myself tougher in some ways than many men I meet. And I wouldn’t be able to call myself particularly kind, e.g., a lot of popular ideologies in the modern world I consider some form of a mental illness and deformation/deviation/repression rather than being all “let’s celebrate this” in a way most liberal women are. I am more pragmatic and practical. I am also more sharp on the edges and more combative. Honestly I don’t know how to become more loving and accepting. I’ve been trying to do that for at least 2-3 years, and I moved the needle maybe 1 mm. I wonder if this is why I struggle in dating..

Not looking to become anyone’s punching bag here. If you want to blow off some steam by trolling, find someone else.

I was once doing a group Holotropic session in a resort - there was a spiritual teacher invited there and she decided to host it for the people who are interested. Not everyone was spiritual and one lady bursted laughing in the beginning of it and left the room because she found it too funny and ridiculous. She didn’t come back. Then when we were talking about it, she said she just doesn’t get it, when she is feeling bad she just has a drink with her friends. I was talking to my friend the other day and her cousin invited her for a group breath work and meditation session. My friend said she can’t imagine going there because she will just burst out laughing. What is so funny and ridiculous about spiritual practices to some people?

If you were raised in a family where no one heard you, gaslighted you, didn’t care about your emotions - you needed to yell and scream to try to be heard and even then you would be laughed at or belittled or ignored.. You are used to this, and so if any other person would run away from a parter that you chose, they would feel disgusted about them, as if they were a smelly rotten fish, or a hobo on the street without his underwear licking the sidewalk, they wouldn’t even come close to them - you stay because to you it’s normal that they don’t hear you, it’s family ❤️ And with this new toxic partner you hope to get your itch scratched - the itch that your parents will finally hear you, that you will make an argument good enough and walk into the sunset with your parents, in the face of this new similarly toxic partner, admitting they were wrong and apologizing and never ignoring you again ❤️

What do you mean to dream with abandon? But I don’t think success is defined with conditions here. You’re successful if you are satisfied with your life here.

In my example CEO is sleepless and anxious and janitor is happy and free.

You have too high of an opinion of yourself and your importance

Why do you care so much what someone else assumes?

Yes, it may be the same people. Which is weird because politics wise their views are holier than though leftist, but dating-wise they go all caveman

I am blonde. Can you imagine if someone said this about asians 🤮, or Indians 🤮 or black 🤮

Damn, I REALLY need to start using chat GPT 😭

When someone is criticizing someone else for something they also do, we have a saying in Ukrainian that goes something like this: “either put your underwear back on or remove the cross from your neck” Is there an English version of this?

I was once on a retreat where if someone is generalizing like this they are supposed to do a 100 pushups

What is more crazy to me, is that his politics section is very leftist, while the dating advice and the kind of crowd there is red pill-ish, passport bros with a “woman is a whole different creature” mentality

Would there be any progress in the world if there was consistent satisfaction? Has joy ever been an evolutionary motivator?