nurthur11

@Mandy Your comments answers my questions. Ty )

So basically all one can do is find resolve or guidance from the how one is feeling ? This is like expressing?

Cool then🙂 Its better than nothing

Love is not always positive but it is persistent.

You don’t have to convince someone to look into your or someone else eyes. You have to try to love and in turn you will share a feeling of hope and optimism.

Try to love.

How do you love bro/sis? Its very easy to love. It feels like your carrying or caring about your self or others. Not sure how to explain it. You have to try it sometimes!

How would having an owner be for you: Do you mean like you saying this is my thought, or there is a smaller men inside of you thinking of a thought? How do you practically experience your abstract self?

I dont know man ) really. But keep trying and hope you find what's best for you.

You might not have this problem but I not sure then how would you notice the phenomena you described(from your description is seems like you are being aware of awareness). Does your body feel like it would in solipsism? If you would let the body go do you feel yourself like a bubble or inside of smth?

Sometimes i notice that i seem like out of touch with reality like i am underwater. This is happening when I feel aware of awareness. Do you have the same experience?

Very good post. There are occasions which some beliefs make sense to me and other occasions were the same beliefs make no sense to me but i can remember them making sense. I am a person who very much lives in its own bubble. Most of the time i live in my own confusion and occasionally i get a clear sense of reality. This makes it hard to disbelief things even when i know them to be untrue or not seen like that from the others. I move towards wanting to aligning my beliefs with other around me even if they dont feel good to me. Not sure what is groundness to you? My experience of grounding is when i am able to hear smell and feel and feel real at the same time but this is not optimal performance and it doesnt come all the time. When performing experience changes. In fact my experience of reality changes all the time. Not sure If grounding to you related to non duality? Nevertheless, I would add - most of this shit(beliefs about non duality) when i feel a sense of clarity and a good sense of self seem irrelevant or fairy tail like to me. Still i fine a sense of relief or salvation cooking up these kind of ideas. Sometimes 8 hrs of sleep for several nights and moving away from addiction makes wonder.

The channel I want is build on itself by itself. It feels aligned. Like the exercise with hopelessness - its not really "channel finding". But if I lose it is not that I can get it back that easily- I just cope with it. I try to catch the moment or trust and allow myself to merge with presence, the worst part is that by that point it's fixed I am behind from what has happened. To clarify more - I would define <channel>: how I experience reality. There is basically a channel which feels like I am a bubble thinking what to do next and how to relate and one that is aligned. The bubble channel(mby more relatable) has like mini channels but they all are similarly bad to some extend.

Yes. Currently feeling like this. Sadge life.

Very on point with the powerlessness emotion's or I would say event. To identify it I tried to see moments in which I have negative thoughts about myself or others. Obviously, that didn't work ! Then I let go of trying and just rest in the moment. While I was observing the content so to speak of this event. It consist a lot of trying to be better or being afraid that I will lose people, being needy, it also feels like I can morph(change the channel but this is harder to notice) also dissociating from reality(connection came back first). It is very easy to fall back into this emotion, or allow my life to get driven by this emotion - but now I know more clearly what I can let go or just try and get better at whatever I want to do or just forgive myself for not being good enough at everything I want to be. The clarity didn't last for long but I am optimistic It becomes better. The attention during hopelessness it is forced inside morph(the state, its 10 I make it 11 so to speak) bubble. When I let this event occur I also as a side effect the attention is left by itself. This has made even more clear to me that attention has its own rhythm and I feel best in when I leave it this way. Knowing is build on its own rhythm to illustrate it. I find it best for me to function in this rhythm, meaning in relation what behavior I don't want to see in myself. Does this make sense?

Thank you for your feedback. It makes much more sense. The key part for me this exercise was that it isn't about solving anything and I am already myself. For me this sentence "bring yourself back to yourself" says wtf are you doing trying to find yourself(not sure if you meant it like this). All the effort that is put to find myself I feel I do it for wanting to be loved by others. I am going back to fear over and over: to detail it more I go up to contentment but it gets interrupted by fear, overwhelmed is a big one also enthusiasm but I don't like enthusiasm as much because it makes me lazy so I might be inducing fear myself. In my expression journal: I fear other people - the future I have with them and the future outcomes of my work progress.

Hi Phil I am feeling anger, fear and disgust. How do I express this? I put attention in the emotion? Or let attention go in the emotion then I become a emotion creator monster.

Why does "non duality experience" feels an all or nothing in terms of experiencing life? Can you relate to this? Either I am whole or non dual or I am dissociated, frustrated, negative, aroused at everything, have problem speaking, relating with others is weird. This happens especially if I am around a lot of people or in a new situation which I find stressful. Hopefully its a maturity thing.

I think I just have to take the time to start recalling and the memory will reveal itself. Sure, a reality of what it happened might get created it depends how deep you go or how meaningful is the memory for me.

To me it feels good when it is figured out by itself - it blends by itself so to say. What I really liked about your last video on YouTube was when you talk about letting the "mind wander"(I will put it these way), taking those pauses in nature or hiking in turn makes one naturally present when washing the knife or doing any sport like skiing or driving a car(In my case it would be from mind wandering to blending with skis and being 100% in the moment). It is like present's(you) goes its own rhythm without one forcing oneself to be present.

I also agree with this idea - when I am not feeling at my best it is definitely harder to memorize; I also noticed that I memorize more when I try to do so.

So it is really about being aware of being aware. In your experience: do you have to be aware of the feeling of being aware or just the fact that you are aware? Is there pro's and con's in regards to pointers?

Can one improve its memory? I know humans can become smarter but I am not sure if now I remember less or more. I would be very intrigued to know how to improve my memory. For sure the way is to try to memorize more but how to engage with the content fully?

Can we learn how to desire less the universal desire? @Mandy

If you become warm/hot you just do nothing basically. Dont try to become focused or aware or anything.