Reena

It also helps to focus on what doesn't make you productive 😁, like keeping a list of these things, for example distractions that did not allow you to do the things you wanted to do and to keep a note and remind yourself so that you don't repeat those distractions.

I think having a timetable helps me more than having a notepad although a full scale timetable feels a bit rigid. I recently bought an app for a notepad and I haven't still used it although still paying for it's subscription.

The problem with people like Joseph (my ex), is that they can never get over their superiority complex, they will always live in it and decay in their own miserable hell of being fed up with themselves, always treat others as disposables and never find peace with themselves. You can't fix such a person because they aren't fundamentally rooted in love.

If you feel like I did something wrong, or that I wasn't on the same caliber and I didn't have much to offer, then you can go enjoy your time with your high quality stuff and I can find my peace somewhere else. I don't need to deal with the likes of you and your ilk.

You're unity.

Sometimes you might want to take a break from the emotional scale and just focus on your state of being.

I created a fictional bank account to keep a record of my rewards I receive both monetarily and otherwise to maintain an account of my rewards. This is to motivate myself to earn more and keep a record of my rewards that I assign myself for tasks completed.

Well I guess everyday is not going to be a roast day thankfully.

Try to break your time so you don't feel like you're missing out on anything. You're in a dilemma where you're confused between giving time to your music work versus socializing with people, girls etc. A better way to see through this situation is to find time for both alternatively. Maybe one week you can go out and party and have a good time. The other week you can focus on your music practice, that way you won't feel like you're having to sacrifice too much. It's necessary to have fun especially in the middle of work otherwise later there are regrets that you didn't dedicate time to it. So just do what your heart tells you to. Don't hold back if something really tugs you in that direction. Life is about work sure. But life is boring without some essential fun. Give yourself that freedom and permission to like and enjoy what you want without feeling confusion or guilt. You deserve joy.

@ConsciousDreamer666 thank you

That's why it's best to disable the personal messenger. No engagement. No BS. No drama.

Source - from an article on the web. Here are some tips for dealing with toxic people: - Set boundaries. Don't tolerate disrespectful, abusive or manipulative behavior. Calmly explain what is unacceptable to you and enforce consequences if they cross those lines. - Don't take it personally. Toxic behavior often stems from the other person's own insecurities and issues. Their hurtful words say more about them than you. - Don't react with hostility. This will only escalate the situation. Stay calm and remove yourself if needed. - Limit your exposure. You don't have to cut toxic people out completely, but minimize interaction with them if possible. - Build your confidence. Spend time with positive people who build you up. Don't let a toxic person's negativity overshadow your self-worth. - Speak up. If the person's behavior is extremely toxic or abusive, explain how it makes you feel and ask them to change. Don't make excuses for them. - Protect yourself. If you ever feel unsafe around someone toxic, prioritize your wellbeing. Abusive behavior is never acceptable. The key is to not let their toxic attitude drag you down. Set clear boundaries, limit contact if possible, and work on surrounding yourself with positive influences instead.

If you're a true to your soul kind of a person, actualized org only offers you this much - TRAUMA, DRAMA, BULLSHIT, STIGMA AND DOGMA. That's all it offers. If you are a woman on that site and if you try to have a strong voice, they will collectively give you a hard time. That place is TOXIC AF. They still talk about me on there, I can't believe the level of obsession those people had with me. Why bring me up when I'm dead?

I was still thinking about Actualized org and how that place systematically ruined my mental health. All the bullying I had to endure in that place, it was too much mental stress.

Sometimes you have to just let people show their hate towards you and let them empty their barrels. I don't know what it is but it's something that is opposite of affinity. Such people are hateful, racist, judgemental, biased and they have egoic and image issues. You have to let them find their closure. You can't reason their logic or question why they do what they do. You just have to let it. Let it go. Let them be in that hateful space. They want to vomit it out. They want to feel satisfied doing it. Yes it's harmful. Their prejudice might jeopardize your situation, sometimes even causing you to lose your job, but you have to be forgiving. There's no point in supplying hostility to hostility. The end result is just more problems piling up. You just stand to lose. Dealing with haters, trolls, bullies is just a losing game. They might win sometimes, making you depressed. You just have to let go. Be firm in what you want and always remember that the internet is not real, it's an illusion , everything on the internet is usually just a game of visuals, what you see is not real. Most people look for attention wherever they find it. So if you attract their attention they will come looking for more drama. Don't feed them. Learn how to diffuse. It's tactical handling and I'm bad at tact.. At the end of the day, no matter how painful your suffering is, what is left is just graceful words. A lullaby. A beautiful word to brighten you up. A hug to make your day. Graceful words will save you from all the hurt, pain, loss, grief and torment. Graceful words will liberate from this torture of life. Those who hurt you or harm you, they cannot find peace either. You see how life is made. Those who want peace will eventually find peace. And those who cannot offer peace to others cannot find peace themselves because they are resonating at a wrong frequency themselves. To be a peaceful person, you have to cultivate that mental state of deep intelligence and strong emotion, you have to be that person, you have to morph into that peace loving strongly intelligent humble being that spreads peace every moment and shines like a bright aura. Such people can't hurt or harm. They shine brightly. Such people are intuitive and know exactly what's going on. They are guided correctly. Everyone is guided, but not everyone is guided correctly. Those who choose to see the truth and understand the truth are wise and intelligent and this needs painstaking effort. The fruits are equally rewarding so it doesn't matter that you have had to dig deeper to do the right thing.

I think one way to feel more confident is to know what kind of situation I'm in and to navigate the best options possible that aren't a perfect remedy to the situation but at least help keep problems and potential problems at bay.

Currently I do work but it's a contract based work. So it's inconsistent income.

https://experteditor.com.au/blog/women-who-secretly-regret-their-life-choices-usually-display-these-behaviors/ This is such an important article. It shows a lot of my behaviour patterns. Women who have regretted their decisions begin to walk on eggshells and they do this for the rest of their lives. I have beginning to show great insecurity. For every little thing I question my choices. I just cannot feel confident anymore. The mental stress of the past comes back to haunt me. My behavior patterns have consistently been psychology related.

This somehow never works for me. I'm so frustrated because of it. The notepad always stays there and I always forget to look at the notepad, both physical and digital. I also forget to look at the calendar. I am always engaged with some other task when the dedicated time slot for some special task arrives. Then the whole day and month is completely out of sync and structure piling up my frustration steadily. I have tried so many methods but just nothing seems to really take off speed the way I would like to. I think I would need a more intuitive, holistic, organic planner that understands my specific problems. I don't know how to do that. Still struggling.

I lied to you. I lied to you. I lied to you. Yes I lied to you. I lied to you. I lied to you. Because I wanted your love badly. I would do anything for it. I had grown desperate. I was going insane, in wanting you, in needing you, in trusting you. So I lied. I thought you would ultimately forgive me. I thought you would make it all go away.

To my future husband- With you I have felt most vulnerable. I have felt weak. I have trusted you fully and completely, so when you ratted me out, I felt horribly betrayed. I didn't know what to do. I don't think I deserved to be treated that way. I was very vulnerable, very naked, very open with you, the most that I have ever been with someone. And yet, I felt my nakedness would be rewarded with comfort and protection. But you attacked me when I was at my weakest. I can never muster the courage to ask for an explanation. Remember that your words have a lot of power over me.

Your needs can set up a trap. Sort of. What are my current complaints? - not being able to have a productive schedule - being moody all the time - health goals not met - low energy levels - always a low bank account - always falling behind schedule - not meeting productive people ever - not having high quality interactions - constantly feeling fed up with myself

Forgot the article where I read this so can't source - Becoming a better version of yourself is a lifelong journey. Here are some ways you can start: 1. Set goals: Define your short-term and long-term goals to give yourself a clear direction and purpose. 2. Continuous learning: Engage in activities that promote personal growth, such as reading books, attending workshops, or taking online courses. 3. Practice self-reflection: Take time to reflect on your actions, thoughts, and emotions. Identify areas where you can improve and develop self-awareness. 4. Develop healthy habits: Focus on physical, mental, and emotional well-being by adopting healthy habits like exercising regularly, eating nutritious food, getting enough sleep, and practicing mindfulness or meditation. 5. Embrace failure and learn from it: See failures as opportunities for growth and learning. Analyze what went wrong, make adjustments, and try again. 6. Surround yourself with positive influences: Surround yourself with people who inspire and motivate you to be your best self. Seek mentors or role models who can guide you on your journey. 7. Cultivate gratitude: Practice gratitude by acknowledging and appreciating the positive aspects of your life. This can help shift your focus towards positivity and enhance your overall well-being. 8. Step out of your comfort zone: Challenge yourself to try new experiences and take calculated risks. Stepping out of your comfort zone can lead to personal growth and new opportunities. 9. Practice self-care: Prioritize self-care activities that recharge and rejuvenate you. This can include hobbies, spending time with loved ones, or engaging in activities that bring you joy. 10. Be kind and compassionate: Treat yourself and others with kindness and compassion. Practice empathy and understanding in your interactions. Remember, personal growth is a continuous process, and it's important to be patient and kind to yourself along the way.

https://hackspirit.com/things-you-dont-owe-anyone-an-explanation-for-according-psychology/ Things you don't owe anyone an explanation for - Your career choices Your dietary preferences Your core values Your religious views Your relationship status Your personal boundaries Your self care practices

https://www.newtraderu.com/2024/05/06/people-who-were-overly-criticized-growing-up-usually-display-these-10-behaviors-without-realizing-it/