crisis

[Mandy]

2 hours ago, judy said:

 

perhaps i am confused as to which actions qualify as "letting the dog sleep" and which do not.

is talking about the pain only going to make it worse? cause it only makes me get hung up on it even further, and makes me get even more upset? at the same time, i'll certainly keep thinking about it, and then maybe it's helpful to let others know what's on my mind and why i am in pain? to process it?

 

🤣

If it feels worse, then back off, if it feels better keep going. It's like surfing, it's all about timing. Allow the synchronicity to guide you. 

[Phil]

[Phil]

On 4/19/2024 at 9:17 PM, judy said:

hey there.

i'll probably delete this later but i could use some guidance right now.

Maybe it’s clearer now the guidance “was” (Is) present, ever-present, and was overlooked via thoughts about the separate self, the knower. 

 

On 4/19/2024 at 9:17 PM, judy said:

 

there's a situation i cannot accept and some thoughts i cannot let go of.

It would seem so “to the knower”. 

Yet without “the knower”, those are just thoughts. 

The thoughts aren’t known to be true (by ‘the knower’). 

 

What’s true is there’s an apparent experience of apparent thoughts (and emotions intrinsically felt).

 

Letting thoughts go is focusing instead on perception and or sensation. (Clarity naturally ensues). 

Doubling down on the separate self of thoughts, the I which cannot… is doubling down on suffering. 

 

On 4/19/2024 at 9:17 PM, judy said:

i am suffering immensely, more than before, and my nervous system is ringing all the alarm bells.

i cannot keep my calm anymore, cannot stay still the way i could before.

i cannot concentrate on anything else, i just keep thinking and thinking.

Yes. Of course. Right?

Part & parcel of conceptualization & suppression. 

 

On 4/19/2024 at 9:17 PM, judy said:

 

it's not okay, nothing's okay!

i'm so stupid!

 

there's a lot of energy in my body,

i am occasionally experiencing somewhat voluntary panic attacks where it feels like i am still in control,

but i dissociate a little while tossing my body on the floor and hyperventilating for a minute

Phone only rings louder. 

 

On 4/19/2024 at 9:17 PM, judy said:

 

i am trying to be brave and ask for support now🤍

🙏🏼♥️

 

“The knower” is as in = insecure & afraid… as knower, insecure & afraid… are thoughts. 

Emotions are felt. Therein, thoughts about there being a separate self, are felt by, you, awareness, consciousness. 

That which is aware of, conscious of, appearing as… thoughts. 

Quite simple… without conjecture, conditioning, indoctrination, etc. 

All seemingly very complex. 

[judy]

@Mandy  noted:)  thank you🤍🙏

[judy]

@Phil  i am sorry.

[Phil]

1 minute ago, judy said:

@Phil  i am sorry.

For what?

[judy]

5 minutes ago, Phil said:

For what?

 idk for being here and for struggling and for being unable to do as i am told.

[Mandy]

I don't know why Michael is glaring.

[judy]

@Phil  if it could actually fix things, apologising would feel good.

[Phil]

@Mandy

He’s doing his best not to say that’s what she said. It’s challenging. 
 

57 minutes ago, judy said:

 idk for being here and for struggling and for being unable to do as i am told.

That isn’t about anyone though. It’s just judgmental thoughts on behalf of a fictitious knower of good and bad, right and wrong, etc. Same ‘knower’ of states of yourself. 
 

24 minutes ago, judy said:

@Phil  if it could actually fix things, apologising would feel good.

Because the separate self is just thoughts, there’s no one there’s anything wrong with to fix. There is only the judgmental thoughts believed that there is and how the thoughts feel. There’s certainly no need to apologize as the discord and beliefs aren’t experienced.

 

Seeking (state chasing) is entirely innocence. Trying to get back to Good. Not possible. Never left. 
 

I got being sorry. Boy do I get being sorry. Just not to anyone or having anything to do with this place. Karma’s a bitch. 

[Phil]

Self improvement, raising consciousness, all indoctrination. Conjecture. Thoughts. 

 

 

[Mandy]

21 minutes ago, Phil said:

@Mandy

He’s doing his best not to say that’s what she said. It’s challenging. 

Apparently neither Phil nor Michael have that ability. 

[Someone here]

4 hours ago, Phil said:

You’re infinite. Stability & security are not an issue. There are these thoughts, and there is the guidance of emotion. There is also aversion & suppression, such as believing there is a separate self, the knower. 

 

It might be clarifying to note ‘the emperor’s new clothes’. The point is you’re already naked. So to speak. You can ‘put on all kinds of knowing / clothes’. You’re still naked obviously / there is still how thoughts you’re appearing as feel to you. You are Being, being. 

 

Might also be clarifying to notice the comparison implied by thought. To derive ‘this state of consciousness’ is to compare with ‘that state of consciousness’. Where is this state of consciousness and that state of consciousness? Thought / memory, isn’t it? Perhaps there’s an opportunity to notice and no longer believe comparative thoughts, and to feel the emotion of comparative thoughts. 

 

Pain is bodily & localized. As in can be pointed to. Suffering is not, and can’t be pointed to. 

 

 

Something to consider if interested… emotional suppression doesn’t hold up in relationships like theories & concepts don’t hold up in two way conversations (communication). A one-way video can be very convincing as consciousness is innocence & must initially overlook the reality of itself (Being, being). The free monthly two-way calls may be more conducive to relationships than one-way videos. Consider the relationships and or isolation of the source of the theories, in the ‘is what you’re convinced of & emulating conducive with what you actually want to create & experience’ sense. Make sense?

 

Also if interested, consider the obviousness of the discord not only relationships wise, but health & well-being wise, and maybe allow some exercise. Draw directly of the source vs resources. 

 

If that isn’t clarifying just imagine a boyfriend, husband, s.o., which doesn’t share the same beliefs in states, knowing & understanding. What would it be like, just presence, actually hearing what you’re saying & responding, unfettered of such (separate) self referential activities of thought & reactionary actions & behaviors?

 

Then of course flip the scrip on yourself. How are you relationship wise? Are your theories even compatible with relationships in terms of authenticity, sincerity, transparency, honesty? 

 

I for one wouldn’t hang around long. The ensuing manipulation just doesn’t resonate. This love isn’t coming from me. Enablement, codependency, emotional rollercoaster. No thanks. Pass. 

Do you ever just sit back and think to yourself " what the hell I'm talking about "?

🤣

[Someone here]

@Phil just joking BTW 

 

[Mandy]

3 hours ago, Phil said:

Self improvement, raising consciousness, all indoctrination. Conjecture. Thoughts. 

 

 

 

[Phil]

3 hours ago, Someone here said:

Do you ever just sit back and think to yourself " what the hell I'm talking about "?

🤣

That’s really funny. 😆 

[Phil]

@judy

 

You might be feeling blame but believing it’s his fault you’re feeling it (the emotion blame). 

 

You might be feeling revenge and believing manifesting the emotion as action & behavior will make the (emotion) revenge felt subside. 

 

The beauty of expression is the boundlessness. It’s wide open. Forum wise there’s guidelines with respect to nonviolence and potential escalation of emotions manifesting as harmful actions or behaviors. But otherwise, wide open. Feel free to express blame & revenge until it’s entirely emptied. Interpretation will naturaly turn a better feeling more aligned corner just from letting it all out. 

 

 

If it is believed emotions are not felt, and how you feel so to speak is his fault and revenge is necessary to feel better… this might feel off and there might be a sense of that you are not in control. You are however always in control, as you can acknowledge emotions. More so, emotion is not-of-this-world guidance, and way better than control. 

 

This would make this better for yourself & save you as it were, as this would be the acknowledgment of the discord/suffering felt, and the inherent guidance for alignment felt as well. 

 

It’s not too late. It’s always now. Thoughts, emotions & feeling are experienced presently only. The ‘tricky aspect’ is thoughts can be about other-than-now, and it can actually seem like there really is other-than-now. 

 

In the longer term (momentum / now / the present) thought t attachment can be considered as it relates to believing thoughts and (seemingly) not being present. Also emotions can be acknowledged more readily, which also curbs much suffering and relates to the manifesting / attracting of what you want. 

 

There is no source of bad, wrong, unwanted, etc, and so focusing on what there is no source of can feel hollow, disconnected and even isolating. 

 

But you’re the boss of focus too, so, no problem. 🙂