It's been a while since I received a hug

[Reena]

                          

 

Now I understand how black people feel. They were enslaved, oppressed. It resulted in trauma. 

 

Now if a white police officer tells a black dude to stand up or get out of the car, it can feel oppressive, even threatening. 

 

What if the white police officer took your life? 

 

A lot of black people have lost their lives to white police officers. This is no secret.

 

So if you have to understand where the "I'm not going to listen or conform" mentality comes from 

 

Sometimes it's okay. Sometimes it's not. 

 

Like it's not okay to threaten someone in a park. And if you are told to go, you must go. 

 

Everything is a pendulum..

 

You need a balance. Lack of conformity can even appear as entitlement. 

 

Edited December 26, 2023 by Reena

[Reena]

I'm younger than some people. So sometimes I don't get what older folks will understand very easily. At least I have the ability to question the statue quo. 

 

[Reena]

 

                                       

 

 

 

This this this this. 

 

I am not sure what the drama of yours is about. However, apathy, pseudo-nondualism, blatant dismissiveness, over-emphasis on superficial harmony over the legitimate well-being of extraneous perspectives, passive-aggressive entitlement, belittlement, perpetuate nonchalant maceration of victims, sophistry (particularly strawman, status quoism, appeal to naturalism, short-sighted disregard on fundamental principles | needs, oxymoronic exclusion of perfect actuality based on symbolic misinterpretations, …), all of such contentions are inappropriate rebuttals to the stoic distressful states of vulnerable entities. Refusal to provide simple concrete solutions to traumatized agents optimizing their slim chances of self-imposed perspectival survival, is iniquitous. I will not reiterate my request. Please d*** my account.

 

 

Edited December 26, 2023 by Reena

[Reena]

Be real. Be real. Be real. Be objective. Be practical. 

 

That's the only way you'll ever be able to create peace in humanity.

You can't create peace using mental masturbation and woo woo. It's a stunning lack of ignorance. 

 

 

[Reena]

Be real. Be real. Be real. Be objective. Be practical. 

 

That's the only way you'll ever be able to create peace in humanity.

You can't create peace using mental masturbation and woo woo. It's a stunning lack of ignorance. 

 

 

[Reena]

Hey good morning, hope you all had a good day yesterday. 

Overslept this morning 9 am. 

 

[Reena]

 

There are so many things that have changed about me. 

 

I used to get mad at people when I didn't receive attention. 

 

Now that has changed which is awesome. 

 

 

[Reena]

I'll always be happy if he is happy. 

 

[Reena]

I think I have a lot of unprocessed trauma around people. It leads me into defensive and combative behavior. 

 

[Reena]

 

I think that people in the past have said that I'm impervious to criticism. I might be. I don't want to always assume that I'm right. I should also try to sometimes be on the other fence. Language and communication can mess up so many things and I'm not a native English speaker so it's always a bit hard for me. 

I always have had communication barriers but lately that has gotten a bit better 

 

I feel like I always have some critics floating around me wherever I go, whichever community I join. It puzzles me because I'm generally polite at face value. Yet if someone was too close, I can bring out my demons in full throttle. 

 

I wanna know what you find disgusting about me. Some of these critics or people wanna comment on my journal to let me know that, I think that's a space that is not meant for argument and debate because it can block the free flow of thought and derail thinking. It's best to have such conversations, debates etc on the forum instead. 

 

So I get that I'm disgusting to some people and they wanna attack me as much as possible to get out their inner angst against me or whatever they are trying to do. 

 

I should not block their thoughts or desires even if doing this might not be the best idea. So I decided why not be a bit more open to criticism. (my intense social anxiety inhibited me from doing this before). 

It's good that despite my social trauma around people I'm beginning to rethink all my positions on how I behave around people in general. It's a  new perspective. I used to be hella scared of bullying 

 

Now I'm like if people want to hurt me, let them hurt. It might feel like a needle. But it will pass. The pin prick is only for a few seconds and then it's gone. 

 

Bash me on this thread as much as you want. At least I will get some feedback on my self. Thanks. 

 

I might respond as I see fit or I will simply consume all that criticism and probably note it down for future assessment of my character. 

[Reena]

Just relax and don't think much. 

[Reena]

Color therapy 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited December 26, 2023 by Reena

[Reena]

Color therapy 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Reena]

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Reena]

The color gold

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited December 27, 2023 by Reena

[Reena]

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Reena]

I'm extremely hungry right now. I should have slept off. 

 

 

 

[Reena]

I hate how people try to bring my energy down. 

[Reena]

Meanwhile I have never wanted attention. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited December 27, 2023 by Reena

[Reena]

           

 

 

 

 

I also don't want to be here on this forum 

Because there are rich people here and I'm the only one who is poor so it kinda sucks. 

 

It's like being schooled by people who will never understand what you're going through. 

 

I'll just stick to my journals. 

 

 

Whatever I have gets stolen from me. 

 

 

                               

 

I've always been in and around elitist people. I know how that feels. 

 

                               

 

Anyway what's the point of crying over my misery. 

 

 

Maybe some day I will have enough money to do things I wanna do. Eat healthy. Attend a gym 

Gym is pretty expensive around me. Even if I do a decent job, I will never be able to afford it. 

 

Anyway what's the point of fretting. Whatever is is... 

 

At least I get to survive in this community. 

I was kicked out before by peoples dirty politics on other forums. 

 

I felt awful when someone attacked me

 

Yea because white people will never understand a black person's pain. 

 

                               

There are so many things that are simply robbed from my awareness. Things that make up a decent life. 

 

                                  

I prefer a stage blue conservative society. 

 

                                  

 

 

I don't know what sort of unstable thoughts I have had been having lately.. 

                                

And then there are stories and then there are stories and then there are stories. And this is my drunk self speaking. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited December 27, 2023 by Reena