spiritual dreams

@Mandy ok thanks

@Phil ok makes sense. thanks

@Mandy Oh ok that kind of makes sense. How does manifestation happen then if not through thoughts?

@Phil @Mandy Fair enough. But could I be manifesting these things through thought and resistance?

How can these things be perfection? From a nondual point of view I can kind of see it. But from the human perspective, these things really suck. Like would you really think it would be perfection is someone raped , tortured and killed your children? Or if you and everyone you knew was put in a concentration camp and exterminated?

huh? I don't really feel jealousy. Its more about death, torture rape, murder and genocide.

@Phil its hard to think of death, murder, torture and genocide as perfection and those happen to my the subjects of my intrusive thoughts.

@Mandy That is an interesting question. When it's in my head, it feels more real and there's a lot of resistance, whereas when I write it down, its just words.

I get what you mean, but there is a certain fear preventing me from doing that. Like if I let go, I will actually manifest the intrusive thoughts. Well there are pros and cons to it. Thinking of the mind as parts is useful as it allows you to apply systems thinking to the mind. This allows for really deep trauma healing that otherwise wasn't available with the perspective of one mind. It also seems to me the most accurate in my day to day life. For example, there is a part of me that wants to be motivated and productive, while another part of me wants to procrastinate. I can literally feel them in different places in my energetic body as well as their energetic pull. Since caring is based on feelings, I care more about how I feel.

My areas to focus on from now are: sexual trauma and frustration. attitude towards girls and dating. addictions, distractions and procrastination feelings of unworthiness resistance towards change feelings of emptiness tiredness and numbness fawn response and people pleasing resistance towards living consciously intrusive thoughts parts that resist IFS Damn that's a lotta homework. Best get cracking

Over the past few months, I've managed to unburden many of my parts. I've created a dramatic transformation in my inner psyche. Old habits and thought patterns have been dissolved and I feel like a completely different person to who I was before. However there are some drawbacks. The major one is the constant ego/protector backlash. Every major change I make to my psyche destabilises the homeostatic balance of my mind causing a period of turmoil in my mind where parts struggle to balance themselves. It's impossible to get every protector to back down and I just have so many parts. The second is the fact that too much inner transformation can make me feel like I'm losing my identity. I'm at a point where I don't really know who I am anymore. The person I once was is gone. Its also quite difficult to manage my internal system. Parts need to be constantly checked up on and it can be difficult because there are so many of them. Also, each round of progress, uncovers more deeper parts. As soon as I think I'm completely healed, more parts reveal themselves.

@Cupcake sure, go ahead. I'm happy to answer any questions. Although I would prefer questions by PM

@Mandy insightful

@Mandy Usually it goes like: Me: I should trust the universe and allow things to unfold intrusive thought: Are you sure about that? what if your loved ones die horrible deaths? What if you get a horrific disease? after all, the universe hasn't exactly been nice to you... Me: its ok everything happens according to the universes plan intrusive thought: That doesn't mean the universe has your bests interest at heart. After all, look at all the suffering, disease ,death, murder, rape, torture and genocide that happens. Did the universe have their bests interests at heart. Me: fucks sake, stop focusing on the negatives, you're giving them energy intrusive thoughts: haha fuck you bitch. you're giving me energy so now all these awful things will actually manifest. Me: 😱😬

Letting go is the challenge 😅 It certainly feels that way. neither really. Its hard to feel comfortable about intrusive thoughts about horrific things happening to your loved ones.

'It's a rewarding challenge to feel that way' i guess... 'I have parts of my mind that don't like nasty surprises so they, prepare for the worst' I'm not sure yes this is the case, but it certainly does not feel comfortable

yes not so great

Idk aren't they the same? The latter for both. However its hard to feel that way. They both feel pretty good

@Phil I'm speaking in the context of law of attraction. I.e. your thoughts create your reality, visualizations, acting like you have it, etc... Trying to manifest the obvious, i.e. sex, money, career ,love, friends, opportunities. But in particular, I want my life to shift to abundance and also to attract a specific person. I'm going about doing it via shadow work and healing trauma and limiting beliefs, but also being present and practicing the notion that I have everything I need already.

Recap on IFS: I. BASIC ASSUMPTIONS OF THE IFS MODEL It is the nature of the mind to be subdivided into an indeterminate number of subpersonalities or parts. Everyone has a Self, and the Self can and should lead the individual's internal system. The non-extreme intention of each part is something positive for the individual. There are no "bad" parts, and the goal of therapy is not to eliminate parts but instead to help them find their non-extreme roles. As we develop, our parts develop and form a complex system of interactions among themselves; therefore, systems theory can be applied to the internal system. When the system is reorganized, parts can change rapidly. Changes in the internal system will affect changes in the external system and vice versa. The implication of this assumption is that both the internal and external levels of system should be assessed. II. OVERALL GOALS OF THERAPY To achieve balance and harmony within the internal system To differentiate and elevate the Self so it can be an effective leader in the system When the Self is in the lead, the parts will provide input to the Self but will respect the leadership and ultimate decision making of the Self. All parts will exist and lend talents that reflect their non-extreme intentions. III. PARTS Subpersonalities are aspects of our personality that interact internally in sequences and styles that are similar to the ways in which people interact. Parts may be experienced in any number of ways -- thoughts, feelings, sensations, images, and more. All parts want something positive for the individual and will use a variety of strategies to gain influence within the internal system. Parts develop a complex system of interactions among themselves. Polarizations develop as parts try to gain influence within the system. While experiences affect parts, parts are not created by the experiences. They are always in existence, either as potential or actuality. Parts that become extreme are carrying "burdens" -- energies that are not inherent in the function of the part and don't belong to the nature of the part, such as extreme beliefs, emotions, or fantasies. Parts can be helped to "unburden" and return to their natural balance. Parts that have lost trust in the leadership of the Self will "blend" with or take over the Self. IV. SELF Different level of entity than the parts -- often in the center of the "you" that the parts are talking to or that likes or dislikes, listens to, or shuts out various parts When differentiated, the Self is competent, secure, self-assured, relaxed, and able to listen and respond to feedback. The Self can and should lead the internal system. Various levels of experience of the Self: When completely differentiated from all parts (Self alone), people describe a feeling of being "centered." When the individual is "in Self" or when the Self is in the lead while interacting with others (day-to-day experience), the Self is experienced along with the non-extreme aspects of the parts. An empowering aspect of the model is that everyone has a Self. V. GENERAL GROUPS OF PARTS EXILES Young parts that have experienced trauma and often become isolated from the rest of the system in an effort to protect the individual from feeling the pain, terror, fear, and so on, of these parts If exiled, can become increasingly extreme and desperate in an effort to be cared for and tell their story Can leave the individual feeling fragile and vulnerable MANAGERS Parts that run the day-to-day life of the individual Attempt to keep the individual in control of every situation and relationship in an effort to protect parts from feeling any hurt or rejection Can do this in any number of ways or through a combination of parts -- striving, controlling, evaluating, caretaking, terrorizing, and so on. FIREFIGHTERS Group of parts that react when exiles are activated in an effort to control and extinguish their feelings Can do this in any number of ways, including drug or alcohol use, self-mutilation (cutting), binge-eating, sex binges Have the same goals as managers (to keep exiles away) but different strategies VI. BEGINNING TO USE THE MODEL Assess parts and sequences around the problem. Look for polarizations: Within individuals Among family members Look for parallel dynamics: The way you relate to your own parts parallels the way you relate to those parts of others. Introduce the language of the model. Check for individual's awareness of parts -- ask how he or she experiences the part: thoughts, feelings, sensations, images, and so on. When working with families, check for the family's awareness of parts in self and others. Make a decision about how to begin using the model: language, direct access, imagery, and so on. Come to agreement on initial goals of therapy in terms of the internal system -- create a "contract." Assess the fears of manager parts and value the roles of the managers; explain how the therapy can work without the feared outcomes of the managers happening. Inventory dangerous firefighters; work with managers' fears about triggering firefighters. Assess external context and constraints to doing this work. VII. RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN INTERNAL AND EXTERNAL SYSTEMS The way you relate to your own parts parallels the way you relate to those parts of others. Individual's internal system affects and is affected by the external system of which he or she is a part. Internal and external systems often parallel each other.

I had a really good journal about IFS on the actualized forum. I made a lot of progress and a lot of people read it and asked me loads of questions about IFS and I'm happy to have helped them. Unfortunately a certain DMT plugging, megamind looking ass mofo decided to ban me for calling out his spiritual ego. Now that I've found a new home on AOB my journal is ready for a comeback.

When I try manifesting something, I always get the most fucked up intrusive thoughts. I then get worried that they are going to manifest and by doing that, I give them even more energy. Can I actually manifest these negative thoughts?

crying my eyes out while listening to sad music 😂

I'm gonna be posting a lot in this thread. Back in actualized, I went by the name of spiritual memes 😎.