Am I worthy of beautiful women?

[Someone here]

9 minutes ago, Phil said:

 I’m asking what you think she’s wanting. Not just descriptively of what kind of guy, but what she wants in her life / what she wants her life to be like. 

What all women need from men ..to put it bluntly..a "real man ". (Which as I expressed before..I'm  not ).

They want to feel comfortable and secure with  the guy. 

She wants someone who is trustworthy and loyal..who will listen to her and treat her with kindness and compassion. 

All women are attracted to basically the same stuff about men .

 

[Mandy]

1 hour ago, Someone here said:

What do you mean "energetically "?

What do you mean "bring to the table "? Money?

If you are talking about how most men value them, I would have to say yes. If a woman is not physically appealing at first glance, a man is not going to take the time to get to know more about her, regardless of what other great qualities she may have.

There are many women who would make excellent wives, but they don’t get the chance once they’re deemed unattractive.

Well ..I consider myself good-looking. So maybe she will want that from me .

But it's not like all men/women ever deem anyone unattractive or attractive. How would anyone know if they are good looking?

[Phil]

@Someone here

Still thoughts about you. I mean what would she want in her life / her life to be like?

[Someone here]

18 minutes ago, Mandy said:

But it's not like all men/women ever deem anyone unattractive or attractive. 

It’s human nature in a way. If you intend to have sex with a partner at some point you’ll need to be sexually attracted to them. You’re right..it’s definitely not the most important thing. As we age.. looks fade and all that remains is the individual as a person. I wish people were more likely to get to know the personality first regardless of what look like as well. Not all men are like that.. emphasis on men..because psychology tells us that men are very visual oriented when it comes to attraction.  And Thats just how men are. Whether you like it or not ..Beauty is also in the eye of the beholder.

21 minutes ago, Mandy said:

How would anyone know if they are good looking?

By looking at the mirror and loving what you see..I guess. Lol

14 minutes ago, Phil said:

@Someone here

Still thoughts about you. I mean what would she want in her life / her life to be like?

To be amazing and fun as fuck .

[Phil]

@Someone here

Think it through a little more. Some details, examples, specifics.  🙂

 

[Mandy]

9 minutes ago, Someone here said:

 I wish people were more likely to get to know the personality first regardless of what look like as well. 

Instead of wishing people were like that, do it, be it.

 

9 minutes ago, Someone here said:

Beauty is also in the eye of the beholder.

Not even that though, it isn't even there. Perhaps because we don't value art or encourage the joy of the creative process in schools so people are thought to have value because of their looks. Appreciation is what it boils down to. Everything else is all trick of the light. 

 

9 minutes ago, Someone here said:

By looking at the mirror and loving what you see..I guess. Lol

That's just appreciation. I can appreciate an ugly fly bite by my eye because it reminds me that I spent the whole day outside and loved every minute of it. Or I can appreciate a mole because I inexplicably like it.  Those things have nothing to do with beauty though, just being able to appreciate. You create it. 

 

[ConsciousDreamer666]

@Someone here Money matters but there are a lot of factors.

Think about it. When you see a girl that is attractive to you, you don't think in terms of 'She is worthy of my attraction to her' or 'She isn't worthy of my attraction to her'.

 

You just see what she is/has (relatively speaking, within the survival game).

 

In the same way Women think in the same way.

 

All of this game, the "love"/relationship/attraction/sex, etc...It's not personal. Just survival chimp stuff.

 

Do what the female Chimp its attracted to and she will be interested. Don´t do it and she won't care at all. The same with males. 

 

 

Edited June 12, 2023 by ConsciousDreamer666

[Someone here]

9 hours ago, Mandy said:

Not even that though, it isn't even there. Perhaps because we don't value art or encourage the joy of the creative process in schools so people are thought to have value because of their looks. Appreciation is what it boils down to. Everything else is all trick of the light. 

agree with you. Unfortunately society values appearance more than anything else. We know this because if you’re overweight you’re the subject of ridicule.

 

We live in super sexualized society that makes both boys and girls think that physical appearance is the only thing that matters.

get your perspective, there's a difference between dating someone only for looks, and dating someone because you're attracted to them, those two overlap and correlate, but are not the same. And you're right about everything, you're clearly saying: looks are not everything when character is more important, you're not denying the importance of being attracted to someone, it's just the focus on looks when personality and character are far more important. 

9 hours ago, Mandy said:

That's just appreciation. I can appreciate an ugly fly bite by my eye because it reminds me that I spent the whole day outside and loved every minute of it. Or I can appreciate a mole because I inexplicably like it.  Those things have nothing to do with beauty though, just being able to appreciate. You create it. 

Yeah you call it whatever you want . I appreciate eating sushi. It tastes delicious. So I like it.  If something doesn't get your dopamine floodgates open ..then you are naturally will be not attracted to it . Same applies for romantic or sexual attraction. 

9 hours ago, Phil said:

@Someone here

Think it through a little more. Some details, examples, specifics.  🙂

 

Well..she will probably want me to take her to the cinema or KFC ..buy her nice clothes and expensive makeup and shit like that . And I have no problem with this . I'm needy and desperate myself .so I don't care if I date a needy woman. 

9 hours ago, ConsciousDreamer666 said:

@Someone here Money matters but there are a lot of factors.

Think about it. When you see a girl that is attractive to you, you don't think in terms of 'She is worthy of my attraction to her' or 'She isn't worthy of my attraction to her'.

 

You just see what she is/has (relatively speaking, within the survival game).

 

In the same way Women think in the same way.

 

All of this game, the "love"/relationship/attraction/sex, etc...It's not personal. Just survival chimp stuff.

 

Do what the female Chimp its attracted to and she will be interested. Don´t do it and she won't care at all. The same with males. 

 

 

And what attracts women's in your opinion? 

[WhiteOwl]

2 hours ago, Someone here said:

Well..she will probably want me to take her to the cinema or KFC ..buy her nice clothes and expensive makeup and shit like that

You want your dream-girls biggest interest to be that you buy her nice and expensive make up and clothes? 

Edited June 13, 2023 by WhiteOwl

[Someone here]

49 minutes ago, WhiteOwl said:

You want your dream-girls biggest interest to be that you buy her nice and expensive make up and clothes? 

anything wrong with that  ?

[ConsciousDreamer666]

3 hours ago, Someone here said:

And what attracts women's in your opinion? 

I have no fucking clue

[Mandy]

 

 

Just now, ConsciousDreamer666 said:

I have no fucking clue

That was a breath of fresh air. 

[Mandy]

@Someone here I think what I'm trying to say is that you want to let yourself off the hook for failing to live up to some standards, and that the standards you have for women might be a good place to start. Lack of standards isn't settling, it's actually letting what you want in. You can't actually appreciate how beautiful something is while also rating it. The act of rating robs you of the joy that is the beauty that's being rated! lol I guess that you may have been raised with very strong ideals of expectations for males and females. It's ok to let it go. Likewise the best way to "be a man" is to let yourself be instead of constantly trying to figure out if that meets your own standards or ideals of what a man should be. 

[Someone here]

@Mandy yeah I totally get you . But I think it's a male thingy as I explained to you above . Maybe you don't understand it because you are a woman . And women's sexuality works differently from men's sexuality. 

My rating is the only thing I care about in women . Looks come before personality.  Hey come on..do you think dudes on Tinder and dating apps care about women's personality?  They only see a cute face and or a hot body  then they friend request-her immediately .

I get from  your perspective as a girl that Its shallow to pursue someone only because of how they look physically..but its ridiculous to think Im going to want to be with you just because you have a nice personality.

Attractive women with shit personalities are good for a night.

Unattractive women with awesome personalities can still be great friends.

Attractive women who also have a awesome personalities are wifed up.😅

 

[Someone here]

31 minutes ago, ConsciousDreamer666 said:

I have no fucking clue

Then what are you doing? 🤔 

[Mandy]

9 minutes ago, Someone here said:

@Mandy yeah I totally get you . But I think it's a male thingy as I explained to you above . Maybe you don't understand it because you are a woman . And women's sexuality works differently from men's sexuality. 

No. It's not because I'm a woman. It's not a male thingy. This is you doing it again, degrading yourself, objectifying yourself. 

 

[Someone here]

@Mandy 

8 minutes ago, Mandy said:

No. It's not because I'm a woman. It's not a male thingy. This is you doing it again, degrading yourself, objectifying yourself. 

 

WAH? Degrading?  I think you are being too harsh here . All I'm saying is that men simply care about looks before personality. Think about it, if someone is looking rubbish or dirty or just unattractive you wouldn’t pay mind to it. Just like any other thing, with new cars, phones , clothes ect….

Isn't that obvious?  Why are you married to your husband if he doesn't look cool to you ?  

[Mandy]

@Someone here Doubting your worth is objectifying yourself. Objectifying women and expecting them to confirm your worth is more objectification.

[Mandy]

10 minutes ago, Someone here said:

All I'm saying is that men simply care about looks before personality.

Not true at all. Maybe you do, not every man does. Those that doubt their worth might, and sadly that's common. 

[Someone here]

@Mandy OK whatever.  I think we've hit a dead end in this conversation.