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How do I get through this life?


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I know, I probably sound like a spoiled brat here, I'm sorry if someone finds it triggering.

 

This has been a running theme for a loooong time. Sort of mixed with depression and nihilism etc.

 

Basically it's that I'd like to have something gratifying and meaningful to do. Something to wake up to in the morning, like a job or studies. But not in a "just get through with it" - way. That feels so off, like the entire universe is shouting me "no!". I want it to be inspiring, something I really want to do.

 

Though I have not found anything like that. Like literally, if I google what sort of stuff I could study or what sort of carreer possibilities there are, none of them really calls  me like that.

 

Right now I do have studies going on (massage therapy), which is or was probably the closest thing I somehow kinda maybe would be okay to do for living. Though now I doubt it too. It doesn't really feel that good. It doesn't feel good and exciting to wake up in the morning, go to the school etc. And I experience worry. That I should finally be fixing my life, that these studies should work out. I can't waste more time and just have nothing going on. I spent a few years like that, my parents didn't like it, and I just can't afford that sort of thing anymore. I have to finally "make it".

 

Every day just kind of goes by and I keep hoping that somehow it works out for me and I manage to have even some sort of a carreer or a future like that.

 

It really does seem like I need to do something. I need some sort of steady income you know. But it just does not feel like it's working out for me.

 

I have trouble trusting that the dreamboard etc. is the answer here. I've been doing it. I've been trying to catch and dismantle limiting beliefs. Still though, the reality really seems to be that I can't just be and do what feels good, cause then I'd be doing nothing, and would probably feel even worse. And certainly would not succeed.

 

I just don't see the way here.

 

Edited by Blessed2

 

There must be an effortless way.

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18 minutes ago, Blessed2 said:

Every day just kind of goes by and I keep hoping that somehow it works out for me and I manage to have even some sort of a carreer or a future like that.

 

Do you try anything new? The same day with the same thoughts and feelings will give the same "result" over and over. Inspiration most likely won't come flying like that. Walks are good for inspiration, if you don't do them. 

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It sounds like you have an abundance of free time. I’d read up on deflection, projection, denial and self-deception, and then come back to this thread with the emotional scale and acknowledge the emotions you’re feeling (see how these thoughts & conceptualizations feel to you). It’ll then be clear that the divine guidance of emotion which is felt now and only ever now, was being (which is present) conceptualized. Feel free to share the insights that arise, and I’d love to get some feedback on these…

https://www.actualityofbeing.com/what-is-feeling

https://www.actualityofbeing.com/what-is-deflection

https://www.actualityofbeing.com/what-is-projection

https://www.actualityofbeing.com/what-is-co-creation

https://www.actualityofbeing.com/on-the-importance-of-exploring-understanding-emotions

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@Blessed2 Id start the day off with meditation for 15 mins to an hour (whatever works for you), I find meditation just makes the whole day better. And also journaling to take control of the thought patterns. Journaling is one of the most empowering tools available, when you journal you are the "Boss" and you quickly see your own thoughts direct how you feel all day.

♾️

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8 hours ago, WhiteOwl said:

Do you try anything new? The same day with the same thoughts and feelings will give the same "result" over and over. Inspiration most likely won't come flying like that. Walks are good for inspiration, if you don't do them. 

 

I've been thinking volunteering or something like that. It's just hard to find something that feels safe and interesting.

 

There must be an effortless way.

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5 hours ago, Orb said:

@Blessed2 Id start the day off with meditation for 15 mins to an hour (whatever works for you), I find meditation just makes the whole day better. And also journaling to take control of the thought patterns. Journaling is one of the most empowering tools available, when you journal you are the "Boss" and you quickly see your own thoughts direct how you feel all day.

 

I've actually been meditating more lately. I liked the meditations that was taught in a Reiki class.

 

An hour sounds like a lot but I think 15 minutes could work for now.

 

Maybe a retreat of some sort would be good too. 🤔 

 

There must be an effortless way.

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14 hours ago, Blessed2 said:

I've been thinking volunteering or something like that. It's just hard to find something that feels safe and interesting.

I know what you mean, i've been considering it as well and i keep seeing ads for it recently and feel some pull. But taking the first step is what is difficult. I think its a great idea if you have time for it. Getting out of your comfort zone, doing someone valueable for someone else, learn and grow.

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7031385C-9DAD-4068-A22E-B5CF1463FB95.thumb.jpeg.16412ed4182cf5f937d572824be626ae.jpeg

What’s pessimism?

 

What’s grounding? 

What’s the significance of grounding? 

What happens when pessimism is not only offered, but acknowledged as well?

What’s next, and how’s that guidance feel?

A little softer than pessimism? 

A bit more ‘listened too’?

 

 

Is there really the belief that the spheres will be ‘seen’ by conceptualization of feeling & emotion, like depression & nihilism? 

Or for that matter, any other ism’s (activity of thought)?

Mental conditions, beliefs, ism’s are the way?

 

Trusting is believing. Manipulation is infectious. 

Apparently. 

 

Only grounding in being, Truth, will do. 

 

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4 hours ago, Mandy said:

The more I live and the more I study some of the greatest books of wisdom as well as the words of many great self realized teachers the more I've found that this is pretty much the only attitude that reliably works. https://tenor.com/view/ride-dawn-big-bird-sesame-street-gif-16569086

 

 

 

Attitude of a yellow duck sort mascot riding a horse? Huh?

 

There must be an effortless way.

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14 minutes ago, Mandy said:

You haven't seen the meme I take it. Or Sesame Street. 

 

I have not. 😂😂

 

14 minutes ago, Mandy said:

I'm just gonna stop talking about things and sell transmissions. 

 

How much? I think I can do $20. I expect being Woke after.

 

14 minutes ago, Mandy said:

There's no reason to take this seriously, your life or any of it.

 

It seems quite serious though. I will die some day you know! Or maybe I'll be poor, unsuccessful and also dead. Very serious. No joke.

 

21 minutes ago, Mandy said:

There's no reason NOT to feel what you feel fully or dream what you dream. 

 

I still feel like crap.

 

 

There must be an effortless way.

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