Indisguise

Ahh yes. The good ol' projecting-authority-onto-the-guru-trap. Now you've just exchanged one belief for another. "After enlightenment", no more desire? Why not? And what is this "after enlightenment" as opposed to whatever comes "before enlightenment"? What is desire? What is love? What are desire, selfishness, selflessness and love? What if I love ice cream? What if I love my mother? What if I desire to do good out of love? Just trying to poke you a little❤️

@Phil Speaking of dreams, a video on dreams would be quite interesting! How they relate to emotions and how they can guide us.

That's a very difficult question. Psychoanalysts have only developed theories about what purpose dreams serve, and where they come from, and what on earth they are.

Voluntarily confronting what we are scared of is the only way of discovering that you're actually stronger and more capable than you thought. Then, finding out that you're stronger and tougher than you thought will motivate and encourage you to keep confronting what you're scared of, which will in turn make you even stronger. The key is to not completely throw yourself into the situation, but to gradually, voluntarily expose yourself. That's psychotherapy 101, and it works. At first, psychoanalysts thought it was because of habituation, but that's wrong. It's because we become stronger and realize that we are and were stronger than we thought. Again, the key is to do it volunatrily and gradually. If I'm afraid of elevators, I don't immediately go and ride the elevator in the Burj Khalifa. I first go and only look at an elevator, without going inside. And nothing happens to me, I'm fine. And I realize that I could stand it, I am stronger than I thought I was. And when that's getting to much, I go home. And then, maybe 2 days later, I do it again. And maybe this time, I even dare to step closer. And so forth, and if I keep increasing the exposure gradually, one day I'll suddenly find myself inside the elevator, going up and down the building.

@fopylo Not really, just a few words I learned while studying Daoism.

In what would light shine, if not in darkness? No how, for any "how" already is. The true how is no-how. Being just is. Spontaneiety is the true how. Lao Tsu says: "Dao fa ziran" ( 道法自然). "The Dao (i.e. the way, the 'how') that is so of itself." The power of the Yin Yang symbol is the intuitive understanding of "not-two-ness" it is trying to convey. It's a very simple symbol, and that is its power. White and dark imply each other, they wouldn't exist without one another. That's why there are not only the two monads, but also the dots; there is a white dot in the black monade and a black dot in the white monade; black already contains the seed for white, and white already contains the seed for black. Explicitly it looks like they are opposed to each other, but underneath, secretly, implicitly, they are one.

@Godishere Your question assumes a certain, specific conception of what "enlightenment" means. And that it's a binary thing. Why would enlightenment (whatever that means) be the end of not accepting - and futhermore, what does "non-accepting" even mean? These questions need to be answered first. @Phil Really nice. Funny, two years ago I would read your posts and be totally confused. Now I read this and it just goes down like oil.

@Someone here Death, life, impermanence, change, appearance and disappearance. All these imply each other, i.e. they always come together. Life implies death, appearance implies disappearance. Existence is not subject to change, to life, death, appearance and disappearance. All these occur within existence, but existence itself is the fundament, the unchangeable, untouchable ground of everything. You are existence itself. Existence doesn't die.

@Someone here Hey look, Rupert just uploaded a video just for you!

Why aren't you afraid of falling asleep at night? What's so bad about sleeping? And besides, does sleep even happen?

Death doesn't happen, dude.

@Phil I would appreciate a guided meditation on existence = love. Today, people celebrated Christopher Street Day in my city and I thought "well if celebrating love isn't the ultimate celebration!" and I was on my way to meditate. Then though of suggesting this to you.

@Lotus https://www.booklooker.de/Bücher/Laozi+Laudse-Daudedsching-Lao-tse-Tao-te-king/id/A02znXeA01ZZu?zid=h248g3dgn98r9mddptvci190mm

Yeah I love Daoism and will reply with 100% certainty to any post about Daoism or Chan/Zen😂 I would highly reccommend to you the original books of Daoism. The first book on Daoism that I've ever read was the Daodejing, by the founder of Daoism, Lao Tsu. But don't expect to understand what Lao Tsu writes. Don't read the Daodejing like you would read any other book, aiming to understand and make logical and rational sense of what is written. Read the Daodejing rather like you would look at a painting. In other words, let the intuitive understanding come to you. Don't rush it. I remember when I first laid hands on a very old version of the Daodejing from my (former) university library, I went and sat under a crooked old willow tree by the water (which I would also reccommend; go read Daoist texts in nature, as Daoism is a philosophy of nature) and sometimes read one chapter a day. and the chapters are very short. Every time we return to the chapters, they will mean something different. As it is also said in Daoism; "The scholar learns something every day. But the sage unlearns something every day." (chapter 48 Daodejing) Next to the Daodejing, read "Zhuang Zhou". He has a lot to say about the useless life. As I said, Chan has been influenced by Daoism and if you're interested further, you can try to look into some of the old Chan classical texts, preferably stories. There's a book called the Bìyán Lù (碧巖錄), which contains many of the great Koan stories and is reminiscent of Daoist mentalities and relating to nature. I highly recommend Alan Watts book "Tao - The Watercourse Way", he has a great and sophisticated understanding of Daoism. There are a lot of German and English translations of the Daodejing and it's difficult to get a good one, because many translations actually miss some of the crucial meanings of some of the ideas of the Chinese language. My favorite translation (habs aus der Uni-Bibliothek von der JLU Gießen, hab da früher studiert😄) isn't in print anymore: "Laudse Daudedsching", by Ernst Schwarz published by the "dtv" (Deutscher Taschenbuchverlag), from 1980. It's a really good translation, the best one I've come across so far, and it has some nice commentary (which is certainly helpful, giving you some context in terms of Chinese culture and language of that time).

Ah yes. Zhuangzi and Yang Zhu had slightly different philosophies - I personally prefer Zhuangzi. To Zhuangzi (who wrote a book with the same title), the useless life, the life of the honorable bum, is the good life. The sage who simply lives day after day and who doesn't worry about the future or about what others might think about him. He lives of the hand in his mouth and doesn't know where his food comes from, he always has money but doesn't know where it comes from either. Yang Zhu's hedonism isn't quite the same as what we mean by the word "hedonism". It doesn't mean to totally chase plesaure and not care about social norms whatsoever. It means to live the useless life. The carefree life. The light-hearted life. Not the "chase pleasure at all cost hardcore hedonist" life. But first and foremost, it's the useless life. The purposeless life. The life that has no meaning or sense beyond the here and now, totally. The old, crooked tree isn't good for anything. You can't make a walking cane of it, neither can you eat its leaves, nor is it of any use to a carpenter. Thus, this honorable tree lives long. The Daoist bum sage who sits by the side of the road, drunk on rice wine, laughing about the terribly serious looking faces of all the people going by who think they're so busy, who has a big bag full of nonsense things and trash because he collects everything he finds on his way, but who gives it to children and laughs together with them - that's by the way the "fat Buddha", his name is "Budai" (布袋) in Chinese and he is revered as one of the ideal men, although he emerged from Chan Buddhism rather than Daoism. But Daoism influenced Chan Buddhism a great deal before it went to Japan and become Zen. So you see, this type of hedonism is characterized by a kind of modesty and contentness, unlike classical Western understanding of hedonism where the motto is "the more, the better." Many of these Doaist sages are said to have been mendicants, begging monks. I personally love Daoism, Zhuang Zhou and Chan Buddhiusm. It's a very playful, unserious way of life and a good counter balance to our Western, busy, serious ways of life.

To be fair, feeling really is all there is. And what are thoughts? Who knows, but you can feel it😄 can't really make a difference between thought and feeling if the difference is thought😂

@Forza21 Yes, you're right. The problem is that as soon as I think about approaching a girl, all my mindfulness goes down the toilet and I totally believe in thoughts. Perhaps I should really cosnciously observe the thoughts as just thoughts and then go ahead. @Phil Guess it's insecurity/unworthiness at the low end and doubt and disappointment at the high end. Next time I'll observe this more carefully and then go back to the scale, I want to see which thoughts arise most strongly. But it's definitely thoughts about myself and about the situation, how either I'm somehow lacking or how the situation will be a failure and this will just prove/demonstrate how the thoughts about myself ("can't approach women, too awkward/shy, don't know what to say, etc.") were true (which would be the doubnt resulting in disappointment - although I'm disappointed whenever I fail to approach a girl, because then my doubt also turns into diappointment ("see? told ya that you couldn't do it")). Yeah, the very first (semi-)relationship resulted in a catastrophy because when I was younger, I was kind of a dumbass (just less than today😄). It resulted in utter rejection, but deservedly. Because again, I was a total dipshit. Haven't fully worked it out yet, but I'm sure this is part of it. Funny though, because I think this catalyzed my general development @Mandy Both! @WhiteOwl Sounds right. It seems like a big deal to me when in reality, it probably isn't. I even thought about driving to a large city nearby and just approaching women for a whole day, just to kinda get over it and see that it's not a big deal, and that the women won't eat me alive, even if it turns awkward😂

Yes!! Not only that, but also vice versa! Feeling something, but saying "I think". Haven't noticed this while journaling, but in general I've noticed this with myself and other people, started to use the words "feeling" and "thinking" more consciously while talking. On top of that, I have the suspicion that the language itself influences the way we relate to thoughts and feelings. Saying "I feel like..." as more or less synonymous with "I think" would work to some extent in English, but it wouldn't in German . "Ich fühle" would really emphasize the feeling of it, the subjectivity, (I don't know why this is) and people might even notice it and think that it's inappropriate to use the word "feeling", because we all know of course how unreliable feeling is.👍🏼

This actually sounds like a case for ordinary, normal psychotherapy, I think. Issues in the relationship with ones parents, especially trauma that's related to ones relationship with parents, this is very very common. Abusive parents or parents who never really were parents to us when we were children, that's a major source of trauma.

Hate it. I see a beautiful girl, I'd like to talk to her and say hello, but I never do it. I'm so god damn shy. And it's just awful, when a girl smiles at me I'm just so perplexed sometimes that I don't even smile back😂 and this seems to be the crucial step in some way because it literally is the first step. Without approaching, absolutely nothing will happen. At least if I could approach a women and then fuck up, even that would be much better. Just went for an evening ride with my bike through the park, saw a pretty girl who just packed her stuff and prepared to leave the pond she was chilling at, she looks at me, I look at her - and I just keep looking at her like an idiot, sort of frozen, incapable of approaching her. After that I thought "jesus christ man, maybe there's something seriously messed up with you, maybe I should pull out the big guns and face my demons with regards to women during a psychedelic trip" (LSD would probably be the better choice here right?). Honestly, that would be more worth to me right now than some insight into consciousness or the nature of reality. Today in the lab, my supervisor made a joke and said "[...] but then your girlfriend wouldn't be able to fall asleep [...]", and I steered to joke into another direction because I'm single, and for some reason, this has started to bother me. So... Gotta start approaching women, not in a disgusting PUA sort of way, I'm not interseting in picking up women. But I do want to get to know more women and not only as platonic friends. Edit: It's even a bit uncomfortable talking about this, because it means facing it (even if it's only facing it a liiiitle bit). But hey, this place is all about expressing and I love you people, so😄

Hmm, tbh I don't think anybody promoted it in that way. 5MeO was only advocated as a kind of ultimate spiritual tool, not as a magic pill to fix your life.

That's such a good insight. When the medicine reveals itself to you as medicine, not diet, then the medicine is truly medicinal. Great stuff, man. Kinda reminded me of this meme😂

@Orb Really cool report, thanks for sharing!!

This is really good, wow. Nice, nice. I like it😊 can relate

@Someone here Welcome to the forum😄🙏🏼