Blessed2 Posted July 27 Author Share Posted July 27 Day 4. Easier to keep track this way. 2 x 15 minutes 2 x the scale Inspection Shitty breakfast Had a great day. Meditation, inspecting the I-ssumption, this is the way. Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy Posted July 28 Share Posted July 28 14 hours ago, Blessed2 said: 😂😂 I guess whoever came up with this didn't care what Rumi has to say: Powerful creator you Quote Mention Youtube Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted July 28 Author Share Posted July 28 Day 5 2 x 15 minutes 2 x the scale Breakfast was oatmeal with blueberries again Inspection: "I'm going back home tomorrow and I'll feel pessimism again. There just isn't anything to do back home. Past few weeks felt nice because there was lots to do. I'm worried I'll start drinking again when I get back. I'm worried I won't get anything I want because I'll just be drinking. I don't think I can stay without drinking." "I'll have to start going to the gym again. I should exercise more. I'd feel so disappointed in myself if I quit this attempt to start working out." "But it feels so heavy, the thought of going to the gym. I don't feel good there. I feel like everyone is watching. I feel like I have to stress out about how I look there, what I do, how others see me. It's so stressful to go there. It just feels like a chore." These thoughts feel like Worry, despair, powerlessness, fear, insecurity, disappointment, doubt, discouragement, pessimism. Who would I be without these thoughts? Kind, present, optimistic, excited, active, lighthearted, loving, joyful, eager. Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted July 29 Author Share Posted July 29 On 7/22/2024 at 11:58 AM, Blessed2 said: Inspecting discordant beliefs at least once a day: 1. Write it down 2. Point out the I's and me's, self-inquire 3. What the thoughts/beliefs feel like, and how do I react when I believe them 4. "Who would I be without that thought?" @Mandy @Phil Would you add something to this? Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted July 29 Share Posted July 29 @Blessed2 Sounds great! Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted July 29 Author Share Posted July 29 1 hour ago, Phil said: Sounds great! Any advice as to how to inspect and question effectively after the I's and the me's etc. has been pointed out in text? Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted July 29 Share Posted July 29 @Blessed2 Noticing the text is representative of thoughts. Noticing the I and me (separate, second) self of thoughts. ‘Noticing’ as in being aware as awareness. Also it might be more clarifying to note emotions experienced, as compared to ‘how I react when I believe them’. Emotions are what align beliefs. Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted July 29 Author Share Posted July 29 11 minutes ago, Phil said: @Blessed2 Noticing the text is representative of thoughts. Noticing the I and me (separate, second) self of thoughts. ‘Noticing’ as in being aware as awareness. Also it might be more clarifying to note emotions experienced, as compared to ‘how I react when I believe them’. 🙏❤️ Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted July 29 Share Posted July 29 @Blessed2 🙏🏼♥️ Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy Posted July 29 Share Posted July 29 Maybe in place of or in addition to who would I be, "What does this clarify about what is wanted?" Quote Mention Youtube Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted July 29 Author Share Posted July 29 14 minutes ago, Mandy said: Maybe in place of or in addition to who would I be, "What does this clarify about what is wanted?" Oo that sounds interesting. 🙏🙏 Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted July 30 Author Share Posted July 30 Day 6 2 x 15 minutes 2 x scale Inspection Breakfast was pretty bad Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted July 31 Author Share Posted July 31 Day 7 2 x 15 minutes 2 x scale Inspection Breakfast not good. Today I again experienced alcoholic madness. Came home yesterday from a trip during which I felt pretty great. But returning home, it started to seem that the same ol shit started returning in thought. Met the therapist for the last time and the pessimism kept growing. I just don't know what to do about it. I tried the scale, I wrote the thoughts down, I inspected. But it's just madness. The thoughts go all around the place. It's chaos. Even took a nap but still felt the same. An urge to drink. Was so ready to just go drinking. In fact I already decided so but the girlfriend stopped me. What she said didn't help, just made me more angry and frustrated. But then she started crying and I felt so guilty that I couldn't go forward with the drinking plan. Couldn't do anything, couldn't even look at her or even talk or hear her talking. So I just lied down and felt through it. I just don't know what to do about it. I know tomorrow it will be the same. And even if I get through tomorrow, it'll be the same day after that. It's really just luck whether I drink or not. I was lucky today. I might be lucky tomorrow. Cause it's really not in my power. I can't deal with the urge and the emotions. To be without drinking is just so much hard work that I can't do it. I go into total chaos. It's unfair. It's not reasonable to expect me to not drink if this is how it is. It's fucking unfair. And I just know it's going to be the same tomorrow. Despair, disappointment, powerlessness, rage, anger, revenge, blame, discouragement, worry, overwhelment, frustration, pessimism. Liberated, happy, joyful, relaxed, optimistic Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted July 31 Author Share Posted July 31 Day 8 2 x 15 minutes 2 x scale Inspection. Brekafast okay. Drank today. Tried my best. Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted August 2 Author Share Posted August 2 Day 9 2 x 15 minutes 2 x scale Inspection Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted August 2 Author Share Posted August 2 Day 10 2 x 15 minutes 2 x the scale Inspection. Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted August 4 Author Share Posted August 4 Day 11 2 x 15 minutes 2 x scale Inspection Good breakfast! Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reena Posted August 4 Share Posted August 4 On 8/1/2024 at 2:37 AM, Blessed2 said: Day 8 2 x 15 minutes 2 x scale Inspection. Brekafast okay. Drank today. Tried my best. Can you explain me what 2 × scale means exactly? Is it referring to the scale twice a day? I'm confused. I didn't understand. Thanks. Quote Mention So basically I'm an autistic INFJ BPD sigma Pisces female with anger and CPTSD issues. Wow wow. My plate looks full. I Couldn't have been weirder than that. Now I get why I'm so idiosyncratic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blessed2 Posted August 4 Author Share Posted August 4 @Reena Yeah going through the emotional scale twice. 🙂 Quote Mention I am the playful and ever-present Source, joyfully embracing every thought and emotion as part of my perfect, unfolding co-creative dream. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reena Posted August 4 Share Posted August 4 8 minutes ago, Blessed2 said: @Reena Yeah going through the emotional scale twice. 🙂 Thanks. Quote Mention So basically I'm an autistic INFJ BPD sigma Pisces female with anger and CPTSD issues. Wow wow. My plate looks full. I Couldn't have been weirder than that. Now I get why I'm so idiosyncratic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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