How do I determine what is wanted?

[Eternal]

In unconditional love everything is great because that is who I am. 

 

There is no better or worse in doing anything as it is all the same. 

 

I still don't get how do I go about what is wanted and what is not wanted? 

 

I know Phil mentions preferences, but I still can't seem to figure out how exactly I know what I want or what I don't want as I feel the same all the time. 

[Orb]

@Eternal if someone gave you a plate of poop and a plate of delicious yummy food which would you choose? boom, thats preference. Its just simply choices made, but theres no chooser. 

[Orb]

@Eternal Love is Unconditional, so preferences are unconditionally allowed as well.

[Phil]

19 hours ago, Eternal said:

In unconditional love everything is great because that is who I am. 

 

There is no better or worse in doing anything as it is all the same. 

 

I still don't get how do I go about what is wanted and what is not wanted? 

 

I know Phil mentions preferences, but I still can't seem to figure out how exactly I know what I want or what I don't want as I feel the same all the time. 

If unconditional love is infinite, what does it know? 

[Eternal]

1 hour ago, Phil said:

If unconditional love is infinite, what does it know? 

@Phil

 

It knows Phil...

[Phil]

@Eternal

Belief isn’t per se preference, though belief & preference are (both) thoughts. Like apples and oranges are both fruit, yet experientially feel and taste differently. A belief is a thought, believed. Belief obscures truth. Preferences arises as to what can be, arising of & as truth. Belief doesn’t create, preference is creation. Eating an orange is not challenging. Eating an orange with a mouthful of apple is challenging. When focus isn’t on beliefs, preferences can & do arise. 

 

 

If one is at a loss for preferences, one is certainly not at a loss as to what isn’t preferred.

One can express and clarify this by writing & seeing a list, on paper, of what isn’t preferred. 

The opposites, preferences, will naturally arise upon looking at the list. 

[Someone here]

20 hours ago, Phil said:

Belief isn’t per se preference, though belief & preference are (both) thoughts. Like apples and oranges are both fruit, yet experientially feel and taste differently. A belief is a thought, believed. Belief obscures truth. Preferences arises as to what can be, arising of & as truth. Belief doesn’t create, preference is creation. Eating an orange is not challenging. Eating an orange with a mouthful of apple is challenging. When focus isn’t on beliefs, preferences can & do arise

I think he was asking how to distinguish between what he prefers vs what he believes he prefer? 

I also am wondering the same thing . you will never be perfect in anything. You can get as close as you can to perfection in something, but perfect is a concept.. it doesn’t actually exist. Therefore, you can continue striving for goals and continuously seek ways to improve yourself regarding it, or you seek another goal. There’s plenty of stuff to do in this world, especially nowadays where you google nearly anything for an answer and travel across the world in under a day.

I've always been aware that seeking goals and achieving them can never make me feel fulfilled.  Once you acquire a certain amount of money ..you crave for more ..and more ..and more ..and it never ends . Yet I'm always tempted to chase after fleeting pleasure thinking it can make me happy .but always disillusioned.  Why is  that ?

[Phil]

9 minutes ago, Someone here said:

Why is  that ?

Unwillingness. 

[Someone here]

9 minutes ago, Phil said:

Unwillingness. 

Care to elaborate? Unwillingness to be happy? 

I think the sole purpose of human existence is to find lasting happiness. That's what we all want indubitably. But it cannot be found in chasing after external things .then again I can't find it internally as well(I don't find anything inside me ,so to speak ,when I meditate. I find pure emptiness).  So that's why I like to convince myself that there is nothing to do and nowhere to go . I almost brainwash myself with this mantra . 

 

[Phil]

@Someone here

Imagine you are roadside with a flat tire and you call me and ask what to do, and I tell you to use the spare tire and the tire jack, and you are unwilling to. If you were in my shoes, what would you say next?

[Someone here]

13 minutes ago, Phil said:

@Someone here

Imagine you are roadside with a flat tire and you call me and ask what to do, and I tell you to use the spare tire and the tire jack, and you are unwilling to. If you were in my shoes, what would you say next?

Lol.

Well Idk .I would say then your trip isn't gonna get fixed ,sir.

. But I'm NOT unwilling to understand you. Dude ,you haven't even made your point yet as a response to my question. Did you even read my question or tried to understand where I'm coming from?

[Phil]

@Someone here

Someone Here: “I’m broke down roadside and I got things to see, people to meet, experiences to create!”

Phil: Use the tire jack & spare tire. 

Somewhere Here: “No! It’s about my understanding & your understanding and you’re not even understanding where I’m coming from! You’re not actually answering my questions! You’re not making your point! You’re not listening to what I’m saying! You’re not understanding me! You’re not helping me!”. 

Phil: Ok. 

[Joseph Maynor]

How does one determine what is wanted?  It's a feeling or some might call it an intuition.  The Third Eye.  Divine Guidance.  Feeling is intelligent paradoxically.  We tend to assume feelings are of the body but feelings are loaded with intelligence.  It depends on how we're defining feeling, but keep it very broad to avoid reducing it to some lesser concept.  Intuition might be a better word to point to it.  Insight is another good word.  Channeling is another one.  Channeling both received and created insight.  People underestimate feeling.  This is a big trap on the path in my opinion.  I try to rectify this by exposing this issue for contemplation when I can without forcing anything down anyone's throat of course.

Edited February 7 by Joseph Maynor

[Phil]

Simplest way: 

Write a long list of what you don’t want. 

Then a list of the opposites. 

[Joseph Maynor]

11 minutes ago, Phil said:

Simplest way: 

Write a long list of what you don’t want. 

Then a list of the opposites. 

But we need guidance in the moment too.  That's a sense.  We can name it whatever we want.  We might call it higher intelligence.  I don't know, the words are all limited too.  Insight is a good word.  Writing down what you want and don't want is good for human concerns and developing the human in my opinion.  That's good too.  I think most people do a bit of both. 

Edited February 7 by Joseph Maynor

[Phil]

@Joseph Maynor

Guidance is a given. It’s nondual. 

[Blessed2]

Hold up.

 

Isn't "wanted" (desire) really just a thought that feels good?

 

For example, a desire to watch a game of soccer... Is a thought about watching soccer, and the thought stands out as feeling good.

 

"I want" is then the comparison between the thought "watching soccer" and a thought that does not feel good (unwanted), like let's say, listening to classical music.

 

"I want to watch soccer. I don't want to listen to classical music." = Thought about watching soccer feels better than thought about listening to classical music.

 

How is feeling then, guidance to what is wanted? How could that be the case, when wanting itself is... Feeling?

 

@Phil

 

[Phil]

7 minutes ago, Blessed2 said:

How is feeling then, guidance to what is wanted?

Watch soccer. 

 

7 minutes ago, Blessed2 said:

How could that be the case, when wanting itself is... Feeling?

Like this. 🙂

 

[Mandy]

Just sit down to write or journal. Ask yourself questions and see what comes up. Alternatively go for a walk in nature alone and ask yourself questions and see what comes up. 

[Joseph Maynor]

On 2/7/2024 at 9:09 AM, Phil said:

@Joseph Maynor

Guidance is a given. It’s nondual. 

 
I agree.  Guidance is a given and it is nondual (although my use of this word encompasses more than is usual).  To label it is just a pointer.  I like the words Third Eye, insight, higher feeling, intuition.  Playing with pointers is fun and something entertaining to do.  It's playing with thoughts basically.  Some people like to do this activity more than other do too.  Guidance is a voice that comes out of nowhere.  To become able to hear this is key.  It's the highest intelligence.

Edited February 16 by Joseph Maynor