Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 5/10/2022 I feel like garbage, I feel like shit, I feel like I'm some going insane, I wish I could be happy again. I wish my thoughts didn't go apeshit. I wish I could talk to people with screaming and losing my fucking mind. It feels hopeless. But oh well, tommorrows another day of shit. I feel like people who think too much are insolent morons who need to be locked up. Oh well, that's how how I feel. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Author Share Posted October 5, 2022 My mind is going and going with some new crazy weird fucking concepts. The concepts fucking nuts. It feels like shit, the world is like a big shit of shit, it stinks. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Author Share Posted October 5, 2022 The primary reason why my life sucks is that I want things here and now and yet I'm certain that I can't have them here and now And that sucks . Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Author Share Posted October 5, 2022 this weekend has been pretty shit and I feel pretty bad. It feels like every time I’m happy for more than like 2 hours life finds some stupid ass way of destroying that happiness. I’ve felt like shit most of the weekend and a lot of my insecurities and depression has come back sorta all at once. I feel really sick right now and I have a massive feeling something is going to go wrong, and my anxiety keeps creating horrible things to boost that feeling and I have no clue what to do. The person I usually talk about this kind of stuff who usually can make me feel better no matter what simply by existing is asleep, and I also feel like I’m pushing him away recently. I keep feeling like he deserves better than me. He deserves somebody with less baggage somebody normal who can do basic fucking things without having a mental breakdown every 5 seconds. Idk I just feel he deserves better than me. And he could 100% get better because he’s an amazing person. My thoughts aren’t even organized I just feel like shit and I don’t know why or what to do about it. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devin Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 @Someone here want a suggestion on how to feel better? Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Author Share Posted October 5, 2022 12 minutes ago, Devin said: @Someone here want a suggestion on how to feel better? Sure.. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devin Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 (edited) @Someone here is there anything available to you right now that you like, that you would like to do, that you enjoy? Watching the sky, yoga, basking in the sun, watching birds and butterflies outside or in the park, drinking a glass of water, eating something, sleeping, working out, jog, walk, ..... There's always something I can come up with, just do that, if you can. You're not productive being negative anyways, so you may as well do what you want to do, it makes you positive for production and you're doing what you want. Edited October 5, 2022 by Devin Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Author Share Posted October 5, 2022 19 minutes ago, Devin said: @Someone here is there anything available to you right now that you like, that you would like to do, that you enjoy? Watching the sky, yoga, basking in the sun, watching birds and butterflies outside or in the park, drinking a glass of water, eating something, sleeping, working out, jog, walk, ..... There's always something I can come up with, just do that, if you can. You're not productive being negative anyways, so you may as well do what you want to do, it makes you positive for production and you're doing what you want. Yeah I enjoy most of these things . But that's not my problem . My problem is even after doing fun stuff ..I still feel like shit . I feel so overwhelmed by everything. I’m overwhelmed by university so far and I can’t seem to focus on any of my studies and I feel like a fucking idiot because I seem to be the only fucking person having any goddamn problems like this. Everyone else seems to be doing great juggling a job, school, boy/girlfriends, and sports and whatever. All my friends and everybody around seems to be doing great while I just feel like I’m fucking drowning in this shit. I want to fucking cry but I can’t even do that. I can’t even fucking cry like a normal human being. I wish I could just run away from everything sometimes. I wish I could just run away from life and responsibilities. But I can’t and I know it. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devin Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 @Someone here so you're behind in schoolwork and lacking motivation? Do you work and do school? Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devin Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 you can run away, don't, because you don't need to, but you always can, in any situation, run to what you want to do, like enjoying a simple glass of water. But you're focussing on failing, but you'll be fine no matter what happens man, because you can always "run away" to that glass of water or whatever, joy is not something you ever have to do or not do something for, it's always here with you, and joy is all you ever really need, so the University stuff and all that, however it goes is fine, it doesn't really matter Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Author Share Posted October 5, 2022 7 minutes ago, Devin said: @Someone here so you're behind in schoolwork and lacking motivation? Do you work and do school? I don't work . But I attend university. And I don't study and waste my time playing video games and smoking and eating garbage food (aka junk food). And I always procrastinate doing my assignments .so when I do go to college I have nothing to show up for . Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devin Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 (edited) 16 minutes ago, Someone here said: I don't work . But I attend university. And I don't study and waste my time playing video games and smoking and eating garbage food (aka junk food). And I always procrastinate doing my assignments .so when I do go to college I have nothing to show up for . I suggest doing the healthy things you like to do instead of the video games, smoking, and junk food. Go for a walk, make avocado toast with tomato, a little red onion, and salt, watch the sky, journal, meditate, just meditating 10 mins daily really helps with this sort of stuff. And yoga, I love yoga. When I do those "healthy" things I feel unstoppable, in complete control of everything You don't want to do video games smoke and junk food, you're brainwashed to do those things, trained The "healthy" things are what you want, that's why you consider them "healthy" You have to take these breaks from your studies, you can push yourself to study but you have to take breaks from it when you get like this. Edited October 5, 2022 by Devin Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Author Share Posted October 5, 2022 37 minutes ago, Devin said: I suggest doing the healthy things you like to do instead of the video games, smoking, and junk food. Go for a walk, make avocado toast with tomato, a little red onion, and salt, watch the sky, journal, meditate, just meditating 10 mins daily really helps with this sort of stuff. And yoga, I love yoga. When I do those "healthy" things I feel unstoppable, in complete control of everything You don't want to do video games smoke and junk food, you're brainwashed to do those things, trained The "healthy" things are what you want, that's why you consider them "healthy" You have to take these breaks from your studies, you can push yourself to study but you have to take breaks from it when you get like this. Thank you for your advice . I sincerely appreciate it . I'm actually gonna drop smoking and pick up a meditation habit daily and daily exercises too. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Author Share Posted October 5, 2022 48 minutes ago, Devin said: the University stuff and all that, however it goes is fine, it doesn't really Could you elaborate? It's not going to be fine if i drop out of university or fail exams. How am I supposed to have a good job without a uni degree? Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devin Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 (edited) 1 hour ago, Someone here said: Could you elaborate? It's not going to be fine if i drop out of university or fail exams. How am I supposed to have a good job without a uni degree? The only thing that really matters is joy; being happy, content, fulfilled; that's what you're ultimately seeking, but the funny thing is is that it's already with you. So really whatever you do isn't necessary; college, career, marriage, children. You already have joy, this doesn't mean you shouldn't do anything, you should do what you want to, but it will never bring you anything because you already have everything, so it doesn't really matter, it's just for fun And another funny twist; knowing this frees you to do what you want, frees you to study If you wind up in a "bad" job, or take easier classes at uni for a lower degree, you'll still have that joy of those small things you love, you can't lose joy. If you disappoint your parents and family, whoever, doesn't really matter, you still have joy, which is the only thing you can ever have, you already have everything Edited October 5, 2022 by Devin Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Author Share Posted October 5, 2022 24 minutes ago, Devin said: The only thing that really matters is joy; being happy, content, fulfilled; that's what you're ultimately seeking, but the funny thing is is that it's already with you. So really whatever you do isn't necessary; college, career, marriage, children. You already have joy, this doesn't mean you shouldn't do anything, you should do what you want to, but it will never bring you anything because you already have everything, so it doesn't really matter, it's just for fun And another funny twist; knowing this frees you to do what you want, frees you to study If you wind up in a "bad" job, or take easier classes at uni for a lower degree, you'll still have that joy of those small things you love, you can't lose joy. If you disappoint your parents and family, whoever, doesn't really matter, you still have joy, which is the only thing you can ever have, you already have everything Before that one needs to understand what is joy if you think it is instrumental, biological so joy is external. If you think it is somewhat related to emotions and feelings it is internal.. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devin Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 (edited) 3 minutes ago, Someone here said: Before that one needs to understand what is joy if you think it is instrumental, biological so joy is external. If you think it is somewhat related to emotions and feelings it is internal.. When you do the things you like, when you're in the moment and not thinking, just experiencing, that's joy; simple and everyone knows what it is, they just don't know it's always there Edited October 5, 2022 by Devin Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Author Share Posted October 5, 2022 28 minutes ago, Devin said: When you do the things you like, when you're in the moment and not thinking, just experiencing, that's joy; simple and everyone knows what it is, they just don't know it's always there How is it always there ? Have you ever had a bad day even once in your life ? Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devin Posted October 5, 2022 Share Posted October 5, 2022 7 minutes ago, Someone here said: How is it always there ? Have you ever had a bad day even once in your life ? Yes, I have bad days, had a lot of them, now when that happens I do what I suggested to you to re realize I can realize joy at any moment, in any circumstance. And that knowing frees me from those debilitating pressures you're under, then I can study, because I no longer need to worry about failing school and all that, I don't need to worry about anything, I have joy always at my disposal, I'm invincibile Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Someone here Posted October 5, 2022 Author Share Posted October 5, 2022 20 minutes ago, Devin said: Yes, I have bad days, had a lot of them, now when that happens I do what I suggested to you to re realize I can realize joy at any moment, in any circumstance. And that knowing frees me from those debilitating pressures you're under, then I can study, because I no longer need to worry about failing school and all that, I don't need to worry about anything, I have joy always at my disposal, I'm invincibile I wish I could have joy for free always in my disposal like you. But I don't see it in reality . I feel very limited and confided by certain things. It's not like there is a button I can press and it just washes over all your problems and give you instant satisfaction. It doesn’t work like that, imo. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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