noomii Posted August 23, 2022 Share Posted August 23, 2022 I have a difficult time accepting suffering as a part of life. Everything about life just seem to be too complex, difficult. I just want to avoid suffering completely. It seems kind of meaningless to me to inspect thoughts because until I've done that I will suffer and after that I will suffer again. I'm only motivated to improve by the idea that I'll somehow eradicate suffering completely, believing I can only be at peace/truly happy when I've done that. If it's all just an illusion anyways I don't see the point in going through suffering. All I really want is to feel truly at peace and happy now and always. I can't ignore these thoughts and just go on focusing other things because they seem to hold me back a lot in a lot I do and they just feel heavy. I currently feel a lot of fear around money/career. If I knew that living(loving) life fully is the only way, that it's the best way and that fully accepting suffering/all of life is totally worth it, I would do much better. I'm willing to question when it feels good to do it, but everything about life still feels too difficult and I don't see the meaning with improvement/effort/work/going through suffering if I'm still going to suffer no matter what I do. How can one find the willingness to truly live life fully? To truly love this present moment? What is the most effective way to let go/take care of suicidal thoughts, to let go of beliefs about suffering and to see truth? I'm aware of the responsibility I have about getting the professional help I need. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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