Rose Posted January 28 Share Posted January 28 (edited) I think that as we grow and try to become more accepting of ourselves, it’s natural that we want to separate ourself from people who are too judgemental of us. It’s a lot of work to try and silence the inner critic so, at the early stages, I think it’s best to separate yourself from the outer critics or limit their presence. I think it will be very hard to try and understand the outer critics, understand that they have their own ego, their own shit and biases. The inner critic will just use their feedback as proof that I am not good the way I am and keep destroying us from the inside. What do you guys think? Edited January 28 by Rose Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy Posted January 28 Share Posted January 28 It's more effective to gravitate to the kind of people you want to be around than to try to avoid the ones you don’t. Or give what you want to get, tell someone they are awesome, doing awesome, encourage them. Quote Mention Youtube Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted January 28 Share Posted January 28 There’s an interpretational difference between -what people should do- (a knower which knows what is right)… and -a guesstimate of probability- (in recognition no one actually knows): Should: 1. Used to indicate obligation, duty, or correctness, typically when criticizing someone's actions. "he should have been careful" 2. Used to indicate what is probable. "$348 million should be enough to buy him out" -What people should do- is not ever going to come from anywhere except - a person / people (presumptively). So which person is the one that decides, determines and dictates - what people should do or how people should be? See how it’s a passing of the buck that could never end with anyone? Three cups; no peanut. Put another way, if everyone were to tell the person to their left what they should do or how they should be, it’d inevitably go full circle, and the person to your right would be telling you what you should do and how you should be. 11 hours ago, Rose said: I think that as we grow and try to become more accepting of ourselves, What about ‘as discordant beliefs are dispelled the truth shines radiantly, dispelling fear, suffering & limitation’. 11 hours ago, Rose said: it’s natural that we want to separate ourself from people who are too judgemental of us. In this light perhaps isolation or the carving out & separating of a self in terms of relationships & connection is in & of itself (the idea or notion) discordant with very good reason. If ‘us’ is considered to be humans, the entire population… then what would ‘we’ separate from? 11 hours ago, Rose said: It’s a lot of work to try and silence the inner critic so, at the early stages, I think it’s best to separate yourself from the outer critics or limit their presence. If there is no inner critic, can ‘it’ be silenced? Is there any effort (work) involved in being, or put another way, awareness self-aware of feeling, such as the feeling of breathing ‘in’ the stomach? Truly, is not all of the work and effort to the contrary? How does hindsight clarity arise, disappear, and foresight arise? 11 hours ago, Rose said: I think it will be very hard to try and understand the outer critics, understand that they have their own ego, their own shit and biases. It simply isn’t possible. But try try try, effort effort effort, work work work - to see that it isn’t. 11 hours ago, Rose said: The inner critic will just use their feedback as proof that I am not good the way I am and keep destroying us from the inside. What do you guys think? Assumption is a weird phenomena. Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joseph Maynor Posted January 28 Share Posted January 28 (edited) Should we stay away from people or not? I think the answer to this is yes and no. There are pros and cons to relating and pros and cons to being alone. I really appreciate my alone time. I also appreciate relating too. I like a bit of both. it's like a veggie goes good with a meat in a dinner. You want a little contrast, a little variety. You want a little herbaceousness in a savory dish. a little dessert with the main dish maybe, or a salad before the main dish. I think it's important to have some relating time and some alone time too. Then you kinda have the best of both worlds. Edited January 28 by Joseph Maynor Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted January 29 Share Posted January 29 Perhaps the inclination is in fact not to avoid or stay away from anything or anyone, but to allow the mind to sink into the nature appearing as, and therein illuminate and dispel the presumption. Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James123 Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 @Rose after enlightenment, you actually become lonely and that's totally normal. You could have friends who can understand you or on the path. Including me, I have friends but no one can understand me. Therefore, really really I have no friends. Just my wife (who is in spirituality). Quote Mention "It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteOwl Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 13 minutes ago, James123 said: @Rose after enlightenment, you actually become lonely and that's totally normal. You could have friends who can understand you or on the path. Including me, I have friends but no one can understand me. Therefore, really really I have no friends. Just my wife (who is in spirituality). Why can't anyone understand you? Can't you have friends who are not "on the path"? Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteOwl Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 On 1/28/2024 at 5:54 PM, Phil said: such as the feeling of breathing ‘in’ the stomach? Now that sounds like sensation to me? Is there a feeling of breathing or sensation of breathing? Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteOwl Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 (edited) On 1/28/2024 at 5:54 PM, Phil said: Is there any effort (work) involved in being, or put another way, awareness self-aware of feeling, such as the feeling of breathing ‘in’ the stomach? As someone who is trying this pretty much most hours not sleeping. YES! The pull away from that simple "activity" is strong. edit: "The pull away from that simple "activity" is strong. " There is no pull actually. Just focus on more thoughts 😕 Focusing on something else than thoughts does seem to require attention/work though. For me and probably many others also, the tedency has been to think all the fucking time. Edited January 30 by WhiteOwl Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 1 minute ago, WhiteOwl said: Now that sounds like sensation to me? Is there a feeling of breathing or sensation of breathing? Yes, sensation. Sometimes I use sensation & feeling interchangeably, like awareness & consciousness. But ‘sensation of breathing or the breath in the stomach’ is actually more accurate, thank you. Sensation is of the body, or, the actual experience of the body... and then even more accurately, awareness is directly aware of the thought (‘body’)… and directly aware of sensation (the tingly-ness, pain, warm or cold, etc, many different thoughts point). Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 10 minutes ago, WhiteOwl said: As someone who is trying this pretty much most hours not sleeping. YES! The pull away from that simple "activity" is strong. As ‘someone who is trying’ is noticed to be an experience of thoughts… and attention is (gently) returned to the sensation of breathing… does awareness of thoughts seem like an activity anymore? Strong or otherwise? Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteOwl Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 6 minutes ago, Phil said: As ‘someone who is trying’ is noticed to be an experience of thoughts… and attention is (gently) returned to the sensation of breathing… does awareness of thoughts seem like an activity anymore? Strong or otherwise? No 😂 Jesus christ.. Its like thoughts go unnoticed making it seem like something is not "working" Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 @WhiteOwl 😂 Laughter really is the best medicine. Thoughts are like the set up and that thoughts are thoughts is like a punchline. Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteOwl Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 7 minutes ago, Phil said: @WhiteOwl 😂 Laughter really is the best medicine. Thoughts are like the set up and that thoughts are thoughts is like a punchline. Couldn't help it. I get caught in the "Remember to breath deeply to avoid getting stuck in thoughts" 😂🤣"Fuck its not working, the pull is strong". Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 @WhiteOwl 🙏🏼 “the pull is strong” 😂 😂 😂 Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James123 Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 55 minutes ago, WhiteOwl said: Why can't anyone understand you? Can't you have friends who are not "on the path"? Who can understand that I am nothing, have never born and now is before so called birth? Of course, People on the path are/ can be my friends. Such as you Quote Mention "It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteOwl Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 1 minute ago, James123 said: Who can understand that I am nothing, have never born and now is before so called birth? Of course, People on the path are/ can be my friends. Such as you I don't like that thought or idea. Why not be friends with people not on the path also? Thats not all there is to it, is it? Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James123 Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 3 minutes ago, WhiteOwl said: 5 minutes ago, James123 said: I don't like that thought or idea I know, ego hates it. 3 minutes ago, WhiteOwl said: Why not be friends with people not on the path also? Thats not all there is to it, is it? Therefore, I can not have friends. Even your quote, you can see. Quote Mention "It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteOwl Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 2 minutes ago, James123 said: Therefore, I can not have friends. Even your quote, you can see. I am not getting you. I was hoping not living from an ego would make you able to appreciate and enjoy people actually and make good connections/friends. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
James123 Posted January 30 Share Posted January 30 12 minutes ago, WhiteOwl said: I am not getting you. I was hoping not living from an ego would make you able to appreciate and enjoy people actually and make good connections/friends. İ was hoping that too But After enlightenment nothingness hits till your bones, wipes you out. Quote Mention "It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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