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I Assume People Don't Like Me


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I'm scared of making friends with people, I don't wanna weird them out. I don't wanna bother people.

"Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless."

A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture

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Inviting a friend for a coffee or starting a friendship feels weird.

"Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless."

A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture

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I get nervous just like when I am gonna ask a girl out. I think it's fear of rejection.

 

 

"Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless."

A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture

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You need to challenge those beliefs and assumptions. The more you think those thoughts and believe them, the more of that reality you will get. It will have the same consequence over and over again, until you do something differently. Coming from someone who have dealt with it and still do. 

"I am willing to try to think differently". "I am willing to challenge what i believe, maybe i will feel better than i thought around new people". Try to slowly work your way up like that. What thought could feel better that isn't going overboard like "Everything is perfect". Save for that later until it resonates more. 

 

And getting nervous sometimes is completely fine, almost everyone does. And again, what about the thought "Maybe my nervousness might not be so bad" "Maybe my meeting with that girl will be a lot better than i expected". 

 

When you sit in your room and think/ruminate about these things, that is just what is happening. You are sitting in your room thinking thoughts, and those thoughts keep you in a loop. The reality of it is only inside your mind. I imagine a cartoon with a person in a room with a huuuge speaking bubble with 76123876 words. What would you tell that person if they were saying the things you are saying?

 

Hope that was a little helpful and didn't come off as cold ❤️ only trying to help ❤️ 

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@WhiteOwl yea thanks for the reminder i get lost in the sauce sometimes.b@Phil i gotta print out that scale and tape it to my wall or something.

"Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless."

A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture

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1 hour ago, Orb said:

i gotta print out that scale and tape it to my wall or something.

@OrbThat's a good idea. That is what I did when I was very depressed. Made a wallpaper on my phone, set it to my computer wallpaper, printed it out and stuck it to my wall. 

 

Always keep the emotional scale in mind and whenever negative thoughts arise, just simply pull out a journal and self express. Use the negative thoughts as a tool for growth, self-expression and self-recognition 🙂

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@Eternal Thanks for the advice, will do! 🙂 

"Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless."

A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture

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If you're cutting onions, and you're afraid the onions might sting your eyes before you're done cutting them up, just immediately rub some onion in your eyes. 

 

If you're afraid someone will shoot you in the foot for whatever reason, what you should do is just shoot yourself in the foot first.

 

 Youtube Channel  

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On 1/22/2023 at 7:20 PM, Orb said:

I'm scared of making friends with people, I don't wanna weird them out. I don't wanna bother people.

That is instinctive, not intellectual.  it is a good thing to have.

 

Language arts is a deception waiting to happen and you have experienced enough let down to know friends are allies of those made you their enemy.  Friends won't enable doubt unless they are friends in need of constant assurances they mean something to others less in social stature than themselves.

 

Kind of goes with leaderships and fellowships.  Lead by example requires taking your own direction navigating time you coexist with everything else.  But in doing so you become labeled anti-social, selfish, greedy, arrogant, blah blah blah.

 

Freedom is given, not taken. By becoming as self reliant as possible, one unburdens everyone else from being responsible for their time evolving here now. To demand human rights to congregate to the point anyone resisting is insubordinate, traitor, blasphemy then the group won't accept life as evolving in plain sight.

 

I have complete empathy for what you descibe, and I offer what I discovered simply adapting to the moment.

Edited by solereproduction
correct spelling
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Posted (edited)

Assuming people don't (more accurately won't) like me is natural (I think) for people that have deep particular interests that most people probably don't have or share.  Because when you're in a conversation with someone, you're naturally going to gravitate toward talking about things that interest you.  It's kind of a downside to awakening that it puts you at odds with people somewhat.  What you do regularly, you can't share.  That kind of sucks and I think causes a lot of highly intelligent or highly developed people to prefer their own company.  You can work through this in many ways, don't get me wrong, but what you really want to talk about is just not going to be heard, unless you find someone who is like you.  And even then!  Relationships are inherently an act of Love because they're a compromise and a patience almost.  It's a giving and a receiving between different perspectives.  It's an allowing, even if it bugs you from time to time.  It bugs them too, right!  Relationships are a sharing, a compromising, a willingness to allow for lack of a better word.  Allowing.  Too much selfishness is like kryptonite to relationships.  Nobody likes someone who can't let them share or won't let them be heard.  That's someone or something not fit to relate; they have some problem that they usually don't even see.  It's amazing how elusive this can be to certain people, myself included.

Edited by Joseph Maynor

💬 🗯️🤍

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