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How do I stop thinking about girls?


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I find that girls tend to take up a lot of my mental thought space. I consistently get thoughts about when is she going to text back and I need to work on my game & become more attractive. If a girl does not text back after a date or a hookup, I feel bad and if she does I feel good. 

 

It is just that a lot of the time girls are on my mind, sex, dating, connection ect... to the point where I feel like it is unhealthy, I don't know why my mind is constantly thinking about girls. I would much rather be focused on something outside of that domain. It can be distracting. A lot of the thoughts I get just always seem to revolve around negative situations to do with girls which does not feel good. There is so much I could think about and it is almost like I get so distracted by the opposite sex that it prevents me from generating my own insights and cultivating a life that I want to live. 

 

Whenever I walk down the streets, I look a girl and think wow she is cute.. It is almost like my mind is so obsessed with females

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2 hours ago, Eternal said:

I find that girls tend to take up a lot of my mental thought space. I consistently get thoughts about when is she going to text back and I need to work on my game & become more attractive. If a girl does not text back after a date or a hookup, I feel bad and if she does I feel good. 

That sounds very needy and dependant. It's not a dynamic you want, especially not if you wan't to attract a partner. Try to really look at your ideas about "having game". How do you achieve it? Where is the "game" located once you have it. You need to realize that you are perfectly fine right now exactly as you are. The thing keeping you stuck is your beliefs about you needing to be different to be attractive, and that you "need" anyone. Its those beliefs you have to look at, not how to be attractive or how to have "game".

 

3 hours ago, Eternal said:

 

 

It is just that a lot of the time girls are on my mind, sex, dating, connection ect... to the point where I feel like it is unhealthy, I don't know why my mind is constantly thinking about girls. I would much rather be focused on something outside of that domain. It can be distracting. A lot of the thoughts I get just always seem to revolve around negative situations to do with girls which does not feel good. There is so much I could think about and it is almost like I get so distracted by the opposite sex that it prevents me from generating my own insights and cultivating a life that I want to live. 

Do you meditate? Its the best way i know to calm your mind and let go of thoughts. 

 

3 hours ago, Eternal said:

Whenever I walk down the streets, I look a girl and think wow she is cute.. It is almost like my mind is so obsessed with females

I know how this feels, and something i've actually tried to deal with myself recently. I saw this video and it has actually helped me, i don't know about the "guru" other than that. I try not to give my energy away to anyone i see, and i can actually feel that i preserve the energy myself. A very good trade once you realize it 🙂 Maybe you can use this video as well 

 

 

 

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3 hours ago, Eternal said:

I feel bad

Some thoughts about yourself feel bad, but you don’t feel bad. If you felt bad, there would be no difference in frequency between the bad feeling of you and the bad feeling of the though(s). You wouldn’t even notice. But you do, because there is a great, great difference.  That you’re feeling of discord is somehow related to an other is a belief. Instead of the story about how the suffering is because of someone else, tell the story about how alignment is because of you. 

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On 8/9/2022 at 1:32 PM, Mandy said:

Think about something else. What do you want to do/create or appreciate that you aren't because you are thinking so much about girls? 

@Mandy

 

Hmmm... Maybe it is my mission to get good with girls and teach other guys the same.. idk though, trying to work on it. 

 

I like bodybuilding, meditation, self-help..

 

Possible things to try include music production, comedy.. in fact I am very much interested in humour and acting, maybe make a comedy youtube channel that does sketches. 

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16 hours ago, Eternal said:

Possible things to try include music production, comedy.. in fact I am very much interested in humour and acting, maybe make a comedy youtube channel that does sketches. 

👏 That would be amazing!!! 

 

I've found through experience that rather than trying to learn self confidence before you let yourself what you like, by just going ahead and doing what you love and are passionate about all of a sudden you look back and find that you already have self confidence. When you are speaking about or doing something you really love, it's just there. It's effortless. 

 Youtube Channel  

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