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Wild Abandon


Mandy

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What if no one was behind this? What if nothing was providing this, no one to thank, no one to blame? What if there were no beginning, no ending? No antagonist and no protagonist? What if you were not the one that expresses, but the expression, what if it all were expression that never becomes expressed, never completes or refines itself because it already is empty without blemish or lack? 

 

Expresser, expression, expressing

 

Thinker, thought, thinking

 

knower, known, knowing

 

Awarer, awared, awaring 😂

 

 

 

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Being open to the possibility of something isn’t a concept. It is the first, & foundational spark to discovery. Nobody realizes anything,  nobody reaches a state, there is just the profound beauty of being Absolutely Open. 
 

Only considering the possibility can unlock the veil on our Boundless Potential. 
 

When we question we can drop the quest, the whole search for an anything, & be with Infinite Curiosity.
 

That first spark I just spoke of, it is really the acknowledging of that there is no beginning or end to What We Are. 
 

None of this is a noun, as in an expresser, or expression, it is all Verbing.

Everything is inging:
Creating,

Thinking,

Knowing,

Awaring,

Expressing.

 

All the -ings are the same movement, Expressing. 
It is veiled by itself expressing all these different terms for the movement of Source expressing itself, which is what Source is, Expression Expressing Itself. 
 

😂 Neither/ Not-Two.

 

When awareness shines on a knot/ noun it is seen it was always The Verbing!

Emotional Guidance / The Life-Force Flowers.

Into Flow. 
 

🌺

 

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On 1/26/2024 at 3:07 AM, Mandy said:

What if no one was behind this? What if nothing was providing this, no one to thank, no one to blame? What if there were no beginning, no ending? No antagonist and no protagonist? What if you were not the one that expresses, but the expression, what if it all were expression that never becomes expressed, never completes or refines itself because it already is empty without blemish or lack? 

 

Expresser, expression, expressing

 

Thinker, thought, thinking

 

knower, known, knowing

 

Awarer, awared, awaring 😂

 

 

 

 

Uuuuuu I like this!

 

There must be an effortless way.

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What do you want?  The freedom to be weird. The freedom to be misunderstood, not Miss Understood. I want to go for a walk by the river. I want light. So funny, that time I tried to worship it. Lost in translation. "time I tried" It's like everything is filtered through this attempt at communicating so I'll be understood and liked.

 

Hi! I'm Miss Understood. I don't have time to get to know you, because I'm too busy trying to be Miss Understood. I have to have every hair in place, my sash hung just you can read it, lipstick is perfect. I'm too busy checking how many insta followers I have, or my face in the mirror to decide whether I even like you or not. 

 

Decide. I could never do that any way.

 

I decided it was a problem that I can't decide. How does that work, you ask? I'll tell you, I'm Miss Understood. 

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I just want to sit down and cry from frustration. 

 

Just have the fight. Have the balls to just have the fight. Or maybe you just don't give a rat's ass. Maybe you know you'll lose. 

 

I want a conclusion, I want a resolution to this. Give it to me. 

 

"I don't remember you." I HATE you awareness. I fucking loathe you. You don't answer, you don't respond, you don't react. You don't do anything. Leave me hanging here. I tore the hanged man card in half. Cause I'm not a man, motherfuckers. It's just not for me. 

 

Ok, so now it's getting funny. 

 

 

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Nostalgia. It was just the lining up of such perfection.

( It was such a mess. )

 

Yeah, it was. A beautiful mess. Embarrassing.

(You're only thinking of yourself) 

 

That's the only tragedy isn't it? Goat songs. Paradise. Clarity. Maybe I should just get the tattoos. I don't want a tattoo. 

(all about you) not two

 

It's pretty interesting though, maybe not me, but how it is all about me. Entertaining angels. I still hate them sometimes. I'm sick of this roller coaster life. Ride, I meant to type, not life.

 

Life.

 

LIFE.

 

LARGER THAN LIFE.

 

Can't get away. 

 

I didn't come here to help uphold a façade, I came to point out the falsity of it. 

 

I keep dreaming that I find this whole section of my house that I just forgot about. Was wondering what it kept meaning. Came across this quote "Your heart is a palace but you live in your head. You own a vast mansion yet you sleep in the shed." -Collete O' Mahoney

 

"If the flesh came into being because of spirit, that is a marvel, but if spirit came into being because of the body, that is a marvel of marvels. Yet I marvel at how this great wealth has come to dwell in this poverty." - Jesus

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Too pessimistic to write appreciation stuff. Feels like all I do is work and be lazy and never get ahead. That doesn't make sense at all, but it's what I'm thinking, so it must be true. 

 

Always looking ahead, never getting there, like the insight while running up the hill. 

 

FUCK. I want what I don't want. I want a new roof and some goddamn fucking gutters. I REALLY want some fucking gutters, cause the water is stripping the paint and this isn't working anymore. There, I said it. 

 

I keep messing myself up by thinking everything is limited. 

 

Yeah, that's kinda the whole me game. 

 

Are you "no shit Sherlock"-ing me?

 

Yeah. Except it's slightly different, it's "no shit, no Sherlock", and it's not for you.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

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No shit, no sherlock. 

 

There's nothing you can judge as bad or unwanted, and no one to figure out what that is. You can however, speak what you want.

 

I want PERFECT timing. I want to experience perfect timing and synergy. I want perfect timing with those who are asking, rather than trying to compile or labor to give them the answers as if they are in need and not also powerful blessed creators. 

 

               

 

 

 

 

 

 

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