Using and Finishing the Emotional Scale

[Blessed2]

25 minutes ago, Orb said:

@Phil when my money situation is improved I'll look into therapy.

 

@Phil 

 

Not to say that this would supplement for psychotherapy, but I feel that a worksheet, something to help get your pen moving (expression) would be a pretty great addition to the tools that are shared on the AoB website.

 

Something that I like about ACIM is the Workbook - section. Rather than having just the "theory" - part, it keeps you coming back & centering focus day after day.

 

Maybe just a few questions & affirmations etc. one might do every day when waking up to set the focus for the day could be very beneficial. Like training wheels for expression.

[Orb]

Tried meditating for 1 hour. 

 

But the thoughts are so loud, can't tell if focus is lost in thought or if that's normal. 

 

Feels claustrophobic 😞

 

Stopped after 15 minutes. There seems to be a learning curve to all of this. I thought ive been meditating these past few years, ive had spiritual experiences, yet im still always lost in thought, I feel like a fraud. 

 

Right now Overwhelment is felt. 

 

Now Frustration/Impatience/Irritation can be allowed to be felt. It is pretty frustrating to be caught up in thoughts during meditation, there is impatience to get all the "work" done as quick as possible. There is impatience in regards to money coming in the bank. It is pretty irritating. 

 

The path is frustrating, the ups and downs are frustrating. 

 

Now Pessimism can be allowed. There doesn't seem to be much hope for the future. There isn't any creative juice in the tank right now. It all seems hopeless. This scale doesn't really work for people who are OCD. The path is hard. The scale is so annoying. Like wow the word annoying was just said, does that mean frustration is felt now? This makes it so fucking annoying, it's like walking on egg shells. If pessimism is being expressed I have to make sure no thoughts come up with words like "Frustration" because if a thought arises with the word frustration that means frustration is felt? God this is so annoying. 

 

Clearly now frustration is felt once again. It just gets so annoying at the pessimism stage, because pessimism is annoying. 

 

Okay, time to express pessimism again. 

 

Pessimism is allowed now. everything seems dull, lifeless. There's no juice in the tank. 

 

Boredom is allowed. Just bored right now. Not doing much, it's easy to use smart phones and music nowadays so boredom is often avoided temporarily, but it is being expressed now. 

 

Boredom, boredom, boredom. 

 

How can an emotion like boredom be expressed? lol

 

It's a lifeless emotion. 

 

Okay, dipping toes into pessimism, back to boredom. 

 

Wow it's sooooo boring to use the scale. 

 

Contentment is allowed. 

 

At least this body is here in good health and this moment is here. Whatever stresses arise in the mind cannot overcome the simplicity of this moment. 

 

There's no need to be jumping with joy just yet. Feels good enough to just feel "Okay".

 

Thoughts of being broke arise but this moment overcomes that, thoughts of mom being upset arise but this moment overcomes that. 

 

The point is to just feel okay. 

 

Thoughts arise like " how the fuck are a specific type of thoughts supposed to be sustained all day long?"

 

This thought is let go now, it is forgotten, it is forgiven. 

 

Thought doesn't have to be sustained. Thoughts arise with no effort, it's the resistance to them that feels like effort. 

 

Overthinking can be let go, spider webbing can be let go, they are forgotten and forgiven. 

 

A pleasant feeling is arising, feels like a tingle in the chest area. 

 

Thought identification leads to an ever expanding story, the path towards Love is the entire story shrinking, basically forgetting and forgiving all discord. 

 

Forget time, forget work, forgive it all and forget it. 

 

When Love appeared as This was any effort needed? Was there any work? Not serious questions to be answered. 

 

If the whole universe operates flawlessly with no effort or individual will, then none is needed either in this experience. In fact it seems the illusion of will does the opposite. 

 

Okay, things are quieting down now. 

 

Hopefulness can be allowed. Let's move up a little bit by considering the good feeling what ifs. 

 

What if everything works out? What if every seeming issue in this experience resolves itself? What if Love is closer than previously believed? Success is a possibility. every thing wanted is a possibility, there is a possibility that it will all work out. Can feel vibration raising, speeding up, life is louder by the millisecond. 

 

In hopefulness, possibilities are considered. The stars shine brighter. Things can work out. Love can take care of everything without any personal will. 

 

Optimism is allowed right now. 

 

Everything IS gonna workout. This conviction comes from the truth that Love is all there is, so whatever is, IS. It's all gonna be okay. There's no need for any separate self to work or figure anything out. Inspiration is more than enough fuel for this tank. The money will come in, the woman will appear, the food will appear inside the fridge. The bank account will have 40k in it. Everything IS working out! There's no need to think about any process, Loves taking care of it already. 

 

Time to allow aligned visions inside this vortex, lets do it!!!

 

-A beautiful family and a cat and dog

-A beautiful house in St. Petersburg 

-A beautiful house in Orlando

-A healthy body that operates efficiently, a good looking body too

-Smelling the grass during Bicycle rides, feeling the cool sweat and the great music playing

-Having a big house with a small waterfall that sounds beautiful in silence

-Taking 5meo dmt with very close friends in the big house in a special room for psychedelic trips

-Having 40,000 dollars in the checking account

-Driving and experiencing the sunset and wavy chill music in the car

-Feeling nostalgia for the younger years

-A building dedicated to universal worship of God/Love/Self/No-Self for all beings to go to and pray/meditate

-Amazing sexual experiences

-Sipping amazing coffee on a balcony on a big house with friends

-Enjoying cardio

-Great open houses with good turnout

-Having great friends from all spiral stages

-Forming connections with many beings

-Donating large amounts of money to effective charities

-Sipping on Cacao

-LSD, Shrooms, DMT, 5MEO DMT Experiences

-Enjoying No Mind

 

All of these visions are going to unfold! Love is on it already! Vibrationally the beauty and Love are felt right here, right now. It's not a matter of luck or chance, but it WILL happen, in fact is already IS! 

 

It's all working out, Love is on it. Its all working out, Love is on it. Body has quieted down, sensation in the body feels smoother, less rigid. 

 

It makes sense now! As Creator-Creating-Creation, there's no rules to be followed when it comes to acknowledging and expressing emotion, because as the creator whatever emotion is expressed is that and that alone lol. 

 

Inspiration is coming up to finish the scale, to keep on milking these beautiful visions, to tap even deeper into the magic of this. 

 

This one is ready, this one is ready to fall on the knees and start crying from all the Love, bring it on Love! 

 

Enthusiasm/Happiness/Eagerness are allowed. 

 

Now it feels like when Goku powers up to super saiyan in DBZ. The knowing that all is working out already is felt, now its just EXPLODING and INCREASING MORE AND MORE!!!!!!!

 

Feel the heart beating with so much Love and Enthusiasm. Just letting the entire system explode with joy and love. 

 

So much excitement, like the transmutation of fear/anxiety. 

 

Heart Is pounding with excitement. Just letting excitement take over the whole system. 

 

So much excitement felt from head to toe, a face mask can't stop this from infecting others! 

 

Feeling the enthusiasm shooting out of  this body and infecting the whole moment. 

 

[Orb]

A large majority of density/weight in the body has disappeared. 

 

Thought is so hyped up right now its awesome! WOOOOHOOOOO

 

Realized that emotion doesn't stop specific thoughts from arising, but rather it shifts the "approach" to discordant thoughts. 

 

Any discordant thought that arises will be burned alive by this excitement and become part of the fire!!!

 

EVERYONES WELCOME TO THE PARTY!!!!!!!

 

So much enthusiasm felt, it's like a massive implosion. 

 

Is this one ready for passion? It already feels like its gonna explode into a million pieces!!!!

 

Passion is allowed. There is passion for health and vitality in this body. There is passion for serving my brothers and sisters. There is passion for Love. Passion is burning bright. 

 

This body feels tired from all the excitement. 

 

Gonna love this thought to death!!!!

 

I Love you! 🔥

 

Vibrationally hugging discordant thoughts is so nice. 

 

Thought arises "If passion is so intense, how come nothing is being done still?" 

 

Hold the thought captive, and Love it!

 

You are forgiven thought, be free!

 

Everything is unfolding! Passion is this moment!!!

 

Passion is the sun coming up and down, the moon coming up and down, the beings brought forth into vibrational reality everyday, passion is behind all interventions, passion is behind all of this!!!

 

Passion is behind supernovas, behind healing!

 

Allowing the universe/Love to flood into this body, to fill every corner and heal it!

 

Allowing Clarity, Empowerment, Joy, LOVE!

 

Love is allowed. 

 

Love is the boss. 

 

For every discordant thought that arises, Love fills it and absorbs it. 

 

For every moment, Love IS. 

 

For all seeming choices, Love IS. 

 

It's time to listen to Love, to listen even more. The highest form of Love is Listening to Love! Bowing down to your own true nature, instead of taking the credit for it!

 

Isn't it beautiful, Love is the boss but never takes credit for it, NEVER!!! 

[Orb]

Pulled out a Abraham Hicks Book that has been collecting dust for a while lol. 

 

I'm feeling charged up!!! Woohoo

 

Can feel the momentum of conscious creation beginning forreal now! 

 

Just experienced "pivoting" and it works! 

[Orb]

I read the Abraham hicks book and it is a great read! Read about a 1/5 of it and it's good. 

 

All is working out, I can always pivot if any discordant thoughts arise. Many seeming "issues" came up in the form of discordant thoughts, when the pivot technique was utilized the issues completely disappeared, this is life changing stuff honestly. 

 

Got a letter in the mail saying that there's a chance I may have to pay whatever the other driver isn't able to cover from the car crash a couple months back. 

 

Discord arises, time to pivot. 

 

What's not wanted is paying for the other driver or getting a lawsuit. 

 

What's wanted is Peace, Ease, Prosperity, Financial Abundance, Abundance, Beauty. 

 

Focusing on the wanted. Focusing on wanted feels so good, like life is a gift, the fact that I can always feel so good is amazing, the fact that I am this good feeling on top of that is just insane in a good way. 

 

Time to feel into the wanted. 

 

What's wanted is conscious creation, this whole life is a gift, there's so much fun stuff to allow, so many incredible experiences awaiting. So much goodness to be tasted. 

 

The car situation is gonna work out just fine. 

 

What's wanted is to fill the day with a bunch of fun tasks! What's wanted is to feel deeper inspiration more and more and more each day. 

 

There's a discomfort in the stomach due to drinking too much apple cider vinegar lol. What's wanted is a healthier amount next time 🙂. 

 

I want financial abundance, I want 40,000 dollars in the bank account. I want to own a house and eventually rent it out to tenants. I want to have a bunch of houses that I can rent out to tenants in the future. I want a beautiful girlfriend that I can have amazing experiences with and we can share our dreams with each other. 

 

I want safety, I want wealth, I want health. 

 

Tonight I will read some more of the "Money and the Law of Attraction" book by A.H, I will then meditate for 20 minutes, then I will lay on my bed and enjoy the softness of the sheets/pillows and have restful sleep. 

 

Tomorrow morning I will wake up refreshed, meditate for 20 minutes, then I will go for a walk and take a small dose of kratom and sip on some matcha green tea, then I will read the law of attraction book and journal here. Time will be taken to deliberately create and plan out the rest of the day tomorrow morning. The day will be filled with tasks that are fueled by the inspiration to create "the vision".

[Orb]

Let's get some positive aspects going. 

 

What are some difficult topics? 

 

-Work Ethic / Productivity

-Socializing

-Substance use

-Impulsivity

 

Work Ethic / Productivity: Its great because it's part of attracting, productivity can certainly be enjoyable. Im sure it feels great to get a bunch of tasks completed and feel the relief of knowing you completed at least a single step forward for your dreams. Working is Playing. It's how adults play, there's many fun games to play, and I can get paid for it too! First comes alignment, then that inspires Productive work! This is what creating is all about! Productivity feels joyful! It feels empowering!

 

Socializing: Socializing allows me to connect with others, it helps me feel that no matter what im facing im not alone. Socializing allows me to be more connected with myself since there isn't an inside or outside. It feels great to laugh and joke with others and to just be around others. So many perceived issues can resolve themselves when I surround myself with other people. Socializing is amazing, it is part of what creation is for too!

 

Substance use: Substance use is innocent and okay! It's a way of shifting the vibration of this body because I didn't know any other way when I was younger. Im using my training wheels still which is substances, I trust in the universe, I trust that with little steps I can eventually take the training wheels off! Substance use doesn't hinder creation either! It's totally fine in this experience! I want health! I want health and vitality. I want to feel the goodness I am!

 

Impulsivity: Impulsivity just means I have a strong spirit! I have a very hyper strong spirit, Ive just been putting this energy into unwanted areas, what if I can flip it over? What if I put all that energy into what is wanted? I can!

 

I don't have to do this perfectly. The momentum of allowing has begun already. Everyday I get better and better at being in alignment with Source. 

 

The "goal" isn't to be perfect, it's just to be in alignment for a little longer than the day previous, just to have a whole day where I feel okay. 

[Orb]

I have sat down many times and have tried to get to the bottom of this. 

 

Is this thought true ^?

 

I won't let any thought swoop me in. Thoughts are sneaky, they really seem like what's going on here. But all of them are just...thoughts. 

 

What happens when every thought that arises is no longer believed? Maybe nothing lol. 

 

Well in this moment right now I feel okay, but I don't really see what Jesus was talking about, how is this heaven?

 

That's just a thought. 

 

So Ramana Maharishi sat in bliss to the point where pests would eat his skin and not feel it because he recognized the separate self and beliefs are just thoughts?

 

That's just a thought. 

 

The separate self and the beliefs held are connected. The knower needs the known. 

 

If the known is gone, the knower is gone. If the knower is gone, the known is gone. 

 

I want the truth. I want to bask in the truth. I don't care if its self referential its aligned and that comes first! 

 

Im defending all that I know about myself. Because I can't actually make a separation between "me" and everything I know. 

 

If everything I knew faded away, I would no longer be. How do I know im here, and that im a person? I know it based on the knowledge of what is known about me. 

 

I know where I was born, my height, my preferences. These are inseparable from me. 

 

So I don't want to let go of everything I know because then I would be letting go of myself essentially. 

[Orb]

I can't stop trying to figure out liberation! Arrrrgh

 

That is a thought. 

 

But what the fuck, That is a thought is a thought, and that thought is believed, how can it be known if there is actually such a thing as a thought. So saying that is a thought would be falling for another thought. and this is all one thought. what the fuck. I hate this. Ooo that's a thought, that's a thought is also a thought. 

[Orb]

There's a weight being held that I don't even know Im holding. 

 

I think im tired of hearing answers, im tired of people telling me that im doing this wrong or that im not going all the way, im tired of there always being some extra thing I have to accomplish or inspect, its getting so annoying. Im tired of everyone telling me the right practice to do to be happy. 

[Orb]

How can I do anything about suffering if im just a figment of imagination? What the hell am I even doing here, im just wasting all my time!

 

The self referential story is coming up. It's so delicious, so tempting to entertain it, to get lost in it. This time I will not get lost in that story. 

 

I'll just acknowledge that anger is felt. Im fucking angry!!! 

 

Im angry at how enlightened people say that this is the easiest thing ever when it clearly isn't. Im angry at everyone! Discouragement Is felt wahhh im so discouraged. 

 

Blame is felt, this goddamn scale is the cause of all the problems, the solutions have created the problems! Arg

 

Worry is felt, there's worry for everything h my god so many ways to get it wrong. Im worried im gonna just quit the game because it's so fucking annoying and confusing. I want to disappear (ego), I want to die (ego), I want to just stop completely. 

 

 

[Phil]

22 hours ago, Blessed2 said:

 

@Phil 

 

Not to say that this would supplement for psychotherapy, but I feel that a worksheet, something to help get your pen moving (expression) would be a pretty great addition to the tools that are shared on the AoB website.

 

Something that I like about ACIM is the Workbook - section. Rather than having just the "theory" - part, it keeps you coming back & centering focus day after day.

 

Maybe just a few questions & affirmations etc. one might do every day when waking up to set the focus for the day could be very beneficial. Like training wheels for expression.

Great idea. 

[Orb]

I got uber eats, pretty excited to make some money! Excited to get in alignment more and more! 

 

I can do it!