Seeking empathy is not playing victim.

[Reena]

We must uproot this attitude that seeking empathy is victim playing. Learn to draw the line. Stop calling people victim if they need real help. If you don't get it, then you don't get it. 

Learn to point that harsh judgemental nasty finger of yours back to yourself. 

 

Stop creating a repulsive unempathetic un-gentle environment. There's already too much of it. We don't need more of these fuckers. 

I have tremendous rage against people who rally against empathy and malign empathy as some victim mindset. 

 

It doesn't take much. 

 

There's a famous saying applicable to such fuckers - "if you can't say anything nice,don't say anything at all." 

At least you do some good by keeping your mouth shut. 

 

There's currently a culture war in the West around these ideas with liberals advocating for more empathy and humanness and conservatives always preaching tough love. It's very infuriating. 

 

If someone is deeply suffering, nobody has asked you to show them empathy or your so called "pity." But at least don't be a nasty asshole to them with your patronizing preaching. 

 

Enough with "you're playing victim" bullshit. Don't hurt someone who is already wounded. 

Learn to be polite instead of a judgemental loser. 

 

 

[Phil]

Offering empathy is empowering as it is a drawing upon feeling, which in a progressive path sense is an orientation of allowing truth, the fullness of feeling, wholeness, and thus a fostering of feeling-connection and feeling-compassion. The outward allowing of expression is an inward trajectory of alignment.  

 

Seeking empathy is disempowering as it is a seeking of fullness, wholeness & completeness of feeling from others via validation, which is a denial of the already ever-present fullness of oneself.

 

It is seeking of the fullness of feeling in the activity of thought, akin to believing unconditional love is my purpose. (Aversion)

 

The seeking of empathy manifests as a two fold identity based conceptualization;

That of a separate self which gives or receives empathy.

And that of love, the true infinite self, as; empathy.

 

This is the ‘product’ of believing false comparative thoughts & often sounds like:

‘Some people have empathy and some people don’t’.

‘I’m an empath or more empathetic than most people’.

‘I’m not an empath or more empathetic than most people’.

‘It’s just how I am / it’s just how some people are’.

‘Some people are too empathetic’.

’Some people are not empathetic enough’. 

Or the materialist’s approach, ‘empathy is genetic’. 

 

Humbling as the recognition of beliefs may be, these example’s are of a reinforcing of separate-self beliefs about identity, as opposed to a dispelling of separate-self beliefs about identity. The fundamental underlying belief in separation is that I am the knower that knows these thoughts are true.

 

Alignment with/as well-being can not be found outside of oneself. Conceptual rumination on empathy can be reoriented inwardly, discovering the depths & truth of self-worth. 

 

In terms of direct experience or ‘walking yourself back to yourself’, the validity of what beliefs are based on can be questioned. As in, the a priori or presumed foundation of such beliefs can be questioned in terms of if the beliefs are based on direct experience or presumption (the activity of thinking & believing).

[Mandy]

16 hours ago, Reena said:

 

 

There's a famous saying applicable to such fuckers - "if you can't say anything nice,don't say anything at all." 

At least you do some good by keeping your mouth shut. 

 

Learn to be polite instead of a judgemental loser. 

What if all bullies are just people that never got empathy and so they believe they are entitled to refuse to give it? And it's a chain of pain that continues on. Only you can break the chain now. 

[Reena]

1 minute ago, Mandy said:

What if all bullies are just people that never got empathy and so they believe they are entitled to refuse to give it? And it's a chain of pain that continues on. Only you can break the chain now. 

Well that's not my forte. I'm not Mother Mary or Mother Teresa. I got my own self to care of than be slaughtered mentally for some random ass bully to be his punching bag. 

[Mandy]

@Reena Strength is built through practice. Treat others as you would like to be treated and see what happens.  

[Reena]

@Mandy I'm not treating others bad. Defending oneself against abuse and disrespect is not a bad thing, it's supposed to be a good thing. It's calling having self respect and when that is eroded it impacts self esteem terribly. Maybe you need to brush up on some basic human psychology knowledge.

Tell your words to a black man when he faces racism and let's see how he responds. 

 

[Phil]

@Reena

Is your advice applicable to you as well? 

[Reena]

@Phil where's advice? 

[Reena]

@Phil you can show empathy to the oppressed. You can't show empathy to the oppressor. They are mutually exclusive and people play stupid games like Devil's advocate but even that is lack of empathy. In simple words - "don't be an asshole." 

You have to go through intense mental pain to understand my words. 

 

[Mandy]

22 minutes ago, Reena said:

In simple words - "don't be an asshole." 

You have to go through intense mental pain to understand my words. 

 

Sweetie, this is NOT an example of empathy, it's the opposite. 

[Phil]

51 minutes ago, Reena said:

@Phil where's advice? 

“We must. Learn to. Stop calling. Stop creating. We don’t need. If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all. Don’t be.”

 

50 minutes ago, Reena said:

@Phil you can show empathy to the oppressed. You can't show empathy to the oppressor. They are mutually exclusive and people play stupid games like Devil's advocate but even that is lack of empathy. In simple words - "don't be an asshole." 

You have to go through intense mental pain to understand my words. 

“You can. You can’t. Don’t be. You have to.”

 

As a thought experiment; if you were in Germany at the peak of Hitler’s reign and had the chance to kill him likely saving thousands if not millions of people - would you?

[Reena]

15 minutes ago, Phil said:

1 hour ago, Reena said:

@Phil where's advice? 

“We must. Learn to. Stop calling. Stop creating. We don’t need. If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all. Don’t be.”

This is not advice. This is opinion. It's called making a statement. 

[Phil]

@Reena

😅 Do these opinions & statements apply to you as well?

[Reena]

@Phil yep. 

[Phil]

@Reena

The op is downright transformative read in that light. 

[Reena]

@Phil yep 

[Joseph Maynor]

Is seeking empathy playing the victim?  It can be.  It just depends.

Edited February 6 by Joseph Maynor

[Phil]

Would an infinite being seek empathy?

[Reena]

@Phil normal humans aren't infinite beings. We are just normal people with normal lives. 

[Joseph Maynor]

9 minutes ago, Reena said:

@Phil normal humans aren't infinite beings. We are just normal people with normal lives. 

 

Don't poke his shadow too hard.