fopylo Posted October 6, 2022 Share Posted October 6, 2022 It has been some time ever since I wrote something, and I feel I must put it here already. Not too much happened, but I might start to forget... So about the birthday topic I was talking previously (I believe I made a post on it/ wrote on my journey here), I eventually gathered a birthday party at my house inviting friends from different paths of my life which was really cool: Friends from home/school, friends from camp, and friends from the military bootcamp. It was a very cool gathering imo and also they seemed to be mingling well. It's as though different parts of me just came together in this house, since each friend reflects a different side in me. I was actually very anxious before the meeting and acted very neurotic and cleaning my room, hiding stuff and making sure everyone was good. So yeah, that was quite a win. The next night I felt very terrible and vomited in the morning (a day and a bit after the party). I felt terrible. The worst sleep of my life. I thought it'll pass but it was terrible and didn't go away (this stomach ache). Perhaps I should go to the doctor. I've started studying already for my upcoming course. Quite a lot to study. About a week ago I did a backflip on my cousins' trampoline. I didn't think I'll be able to, but it just gets me closer to believe that I could one day do amazing things physically. I've fasted for a full day (more like 25 hours) for Yom Kippur. It's a Jewish day for the renewal of the new year and to cleanse yourself from all your sins. I don't really believe in that (in religion) but I still took it as a challenge. It ended up being very difficult also because I was still feeling sick. In case you don't know, the fasting includes no food and no water for 25 hours. Sometimes also more limited screen time. I wanted to also ask what do you guys think about fasting and all that. Tried meditating today after a few days of not. It was quite hard. At least harder than what it was. It's as if I forgot how to meditate suddenly, or rather, created beliefs about meditation in that time being of not doing the practice. My sleep schedule is fucked up bad, again. It is 4:15 and I'm even not that tired. I'm supposed to take the dog at like 8:00-9:30. It's either I go to bed now and force myself to sleep for like 4-5 hours and then take the dog and then go back to sleep, or to pull an all nighter (hoping to stay awake at like 7:00, and take him for a walk and then go to bed). Kinda fucked up. Perhaps there's value in coming back here and writing. Perhaps there's more work to be done. Perhaps I took some steps back. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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