Omelette Posted August 10, 2022 Share Posted August 10, 2022 There are quite a few posts that are similar to this. Quite frankly it feels bad to ask because I know there are a lot of women in this community helping out, and possibly some may even come to try and help me on this post. Here are some beliefs/feelings I have around women: I judge women for choices they make in relationships and sex. I see many of them choose partners I deem "less than" me for various reasons, and I feel anger and jealousy I started viewing a lot of women as "stupid" because I think they choose partners based on emotional whims ( realistically I could say the same for men). I think this comes from a sense that I deserve them more I judge other men and also myself because I wonder why can they get what I don't have? I feel hopeless in relationships I don't know why I am not having success finding casual sexual partners. I don't know what isn't good enough about me and it is driving me insane. There is nothing physically wrong with me. I feel a lack of confidence though, I have become a lot more shy for no real reason the past few years. Sometimes I actively avoid women, not so much from fear but because of this hatred building up, I see no reason to be around them. I feel foolish when I am in this mood and a women acts kindly towards me, but I also believe that the woman does not care at all about me, only acting because society socializes women to be more cooperative. Sometimes I get the feeling like I should just completely disregard this part of life. It isn't like I will never find someone to have sex with or date, but the feelings of the whole dating process seem to cause me more grief compared to the reward of sex. I have to change to be successful with women I am not successful now, therefore to be successful I must do something like: be more confident, speak louder, improve body language and eye contact, go out more, etc, etc. Why even try in life? I wonder what am I working towards? I have these ideas in my head that even if/when I become successful with women, I just want to treat them how I feel that they treat me now. I feel that I am treated as expendable and dismissed, so I will feel justified in doing the same. This is only somewhat related, but in life sometimes I will do something like stop an addiction. I will go back sometimes because of the thought "Why does it matter if I'm addicted?". I don't feel like I can get what I want from life regardless, so it feels like a way of rebelling against the universe almost through the destruction of my body. Since I am not getting what I want, regardless of whether I meditate, lift, volunteer, eat healthy, etc., or drink alcohol in a dark room and eat chips all day, why should I even try? I feel bad regardless. This could probably be another entire forum post. I feel as though I have expended more effort than 95%+ of the people I'm around but achieve the same or less results, it just makes me want to give up. Why is something so simple like feeling good or having a sex life unavailable to me? I really don't know what to do. I look at the scale for instance, I feel jealousy and the thought is "I am jealous because I am not getting sex". Now I just want the feeling and thought to go away, how do I express it? I lost so many relationships because of this feeling of hatred... I simply ignored or blocked a lot of women because I think they are responsible for how I feel, and I am angry that I'm not getting what I want. I was never like this until I spent a lot of time alone during the pandemic and started reflecting on my relationships with women. I legitimately want to scream because of how frustrated this makes me. I ask myself am I seeking validation or sex, and it is a mix of both. Regardless, I am making strides in many areas of life but regressing in relationships. I sometimes feel like I hate being around people now. I hate watching people have fun around me, yet I don't even want to join them because I judge them as stupid. Stuff like parties just makes me depressed now. I ignore invitations because I think I will not have fun anyways, these people don't care about me, the women around will just act a way I don't like, etc. When a woman talks to me now I'm either feeling anxious and shy, or I feel anger so I just give blunt and short responses and try to end the conversation. If I were ever to even get a partner now I would probably end up leaving them or cheating on them just because I feel bad about myself. Yet, I think that I am lacking because I don't have said partner, so I continue feeling bad. I wrote a lot but I'm mainly hoping for advice just overall to help get rid of these feelings and start attracting more women to my life. Every tool I have tried I must have been using wrong because this feeling has taken over. There is a large rise of men making this sort of anti-women content. I think most of it is dumb to be honest, and I am guessing most followers are like me, frustrated men. Whether or not I tell myself "I love all women", "Some women are good, some are bad", "I hate all women", results are the same for me though. Guys recording themselves for an hour speaking about how much they hate women seem to be doing a lot better than me with them though, so maybe I'm the dumb one. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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