Interpreting additictions

[Rose]

Although they are all intertwined, I’ve been thinking of identify the root/key problem for each addiction, I would say they are as follows:

 

Smoking - fear of life itself. Since it has to do with breathing, and breathing is what is supporting our lives.

 

Alcohol and drugs - fear of being misunderstood and not understanding oneself, escaping from oneself and inner and outer judgment. In social settings it used as a bonding agent, for example. 

Gambling - belief that life is “unfair”.  Through gambling either trying to make life more fair for oneself or hoping to become one of the “lucky” statistics. 

Food addiction - desire for a quick and easy relief due to lack of pleasure and joy in life.

 

Medication - feeling out of control of one’s life.

 

Workaholism - belief that happiness lies in achievements and/or material things. Also, “postponed life syndrome” - belief that joy and pleasure must be earned and only then, after working very hard, it will be possible.

 

Porn addiction - for some reason I think this is similar to food addiction, although I am not sure here..

Edited June 6, 2024 by Rose

[Enlightened Cat]

Damn, very cool.

Porn addiction I suspect is something to do with negative/limiting beliefs around dating/women/sex. Although I can only speculate. It seems those are the only types that experience it though, IME.

It's actually almost hard for me to believe that someone can be addicted to porn, for the reason that sexual pleasure regulates itself quite well, in the sense that there is a sharp post-nut clarity that "cuts it off." I suspect a lot of it is self-diagnosed as an "addiction" or "imbalance", because it perpetuates beliefs about self-esteem and dating which are limiting, but those beliefs aren't really inherent to PMO. The mind still blames PMO for all the problems though. The porn is used as an "object" to temporarily hide the beliefs that feel bad. The unsustainable nature of this reliance on PMO is felt and perceived, and deemed an "addiction."

For example, a lot of people will report a feeling of shame after doing it, and call it a negative symptom, even though it isn't inherent to PMO at all. This sentiment would tie into my theory about limiting beliefs being the psychosomatic culprit in the "addiction."

The addiction, you could say, is not the act by itself, but only when the act is used in conjunction to "cope" with the lack of a partner or a lack of self-esteem. Addictions seem to always have that "two-part" element, where you are replacing an initial bad feeling (limiting beliefs) with a good feeling (PMO) temporarily. It is not either feeling by itself, but the relation created, which constitutes an "addiction."

Edited June 6, 2024 by Enlightened Cat

[Rose]

@Enlightened Cat it’s also challenging for me to imagine porn addiction as well. It could be that people just mislabel it.. for it to be a problem it has to negatively impact a person’s life - a person would get sick, lose a job, not be able to stop, masturbate around other people and family 😅.. idk maybe it does exist

[Phil]

@Rose

Great insights! 

 

What would you say is the overall prevailing theme which all of the insights have in common and even revolve around?

[Enlightened Cat]

18 hours ago, Rose said:

It could be that people just mislabel it

I think so too. And if it does happen, probably much rarer. 

[Joseph Maynor]

Another one is addiction to your partner in a romantic relationship.  You don't realize this one until you break up, if you've ever experienced that.  Maybe the interpretation of this one is -- fear of being alone.  That takes a lot of getting used to -- being alone.  You eventually get beyond the loneliness.  It's like you're addicted to another person.

Edited June 7, 2024 by Joseph Maynor

[Phil]

@Joseph Maynor

Emotional stability can be realized without breaking up. That actually doesn’t change the underlying situation at all. The message can even be shared with a significant other. What is in truth already the case can not in truth be said to take any getting used to. 

[Rose]

On 6/7/2024 at 7:17 AM, Phil said:

@Rose

Great insights! 

 

What would you say is the overall prevailing theme which all of the insights have in common and even revolve around?

I think it’s that people are too lost in their mind, disconnected from their source of energy and lost the ability to receive joy in life.

 

What do you think it is?

[Rose]

Another big one is sex addiction.. can’t believe I didn’t think of it first

 

I was watching this dominatrix interview on YouTube where she glamorizes her work, how she gives men a “spiritual experience” charging 10K an hour..

 

This is sad for me because the men are obviously extremely traumatized.. like with any addiction.. drowning their pain (but here literally being in physical pain and humiliation to drown their pain)

[Rose]

@Enlightened Cat what about sex addiction?

[Enlightened Cat]

3 hours ago, Rose said:

what about sex addiction?

Yeah the domination stuff is much more like an addiction since it has an unsustainable financial incentive. It's more like gambling in that sense. But the risky finances also feed into their sexual pleasure. Not to mention, I think those types are definitely harboring some self-esteem issues like "shame" which is being coped with, whereas something like porn doesn't inherently have all of that going on.

Btw, I am entirely aware that "dom" stuff comes in many flavours and sizes, I am mostly talking about the stuff that requires you to spend excessive money, like pay pigs and all of that.

Edited June 11, 2024 by Enlightened Cat

[Phil]

8 hours ago, Rose said:

What do you think it is?

Misidentification. 

[Mandy]

9 hours ago, Rose said:

Another big one is sex addiction.. can’t believe I didn’t think of it first

 

I was watching this dominatrix interview on YouTube where she glamorizes her work, how she gives men a “spiritual experience” charging 10K an hour..

 

This is sad for me because the men are obviously extremely traumatized.. like with any addiction.. drowning their pain (but here literally being in physical pain and humiliation to drown their pain)

Taking credit for giving someone a spiritual experience is an interesting thing. 

 

Law of attraction does not serve a separate self. It will only make bigger and louder what is sought to be covered up or gotten rid of. 

[Joseph Maynor]

4 hours ago, Phil said:

Misidentification. 

 

Why?  Because there's no separate self to be addicted?

[Phil]

@Joseph Maynor

It all centers around a self that isn’t present.
 

I-dent-ity. Dent is like hole. A thought which seems to be for some thing but actually isn’t.

 

Add-I-ction. Adding a thought ( I ) which seems to be for some thing but actually isn’t. 
 

That, the two selves paradigm, is confusion, and is what feels off.
 

Seeking to feel better is on behalf of the second self of thoughts, and relief and feeling better are sought in relationships, substances, states, understanding and peak experiences.

 

Even now, as what’s being said is there is no individual, there aren’t separate selves… On behalf of an individual there is a screen, an internet, electricity, a universe and what’s being said is a philosophy, existentialism, someone’s personal beliefs or interpretation or even religious or spiritual or what someone knows, realized, or discovered or what an individual might know, realize or discover. 

[Joseph Maynor]

@Phil  I feel like it's better to know what thought is than to be against thought.  The former treats thought as almost an artform -- the latter, ironically, is afraid that somehow the thought is going to throw them off course -- as if this were even possible!  This is a misplaced cause or blaming or shaming if there ever was one.  It's a sneaky way to win.  That's what Maya or Samsara is.  Every separate self engages in this to the extent it's em-bodied as a separate self.  It's seated in the body as an individual.  One can play this game, but it's still a form of game and so it creates, sustains, and destroys like all games do.  Nobody wins a streak for very long in any game.  The preserver has issues but the destroyer doesn't necessarily win over the preserver because he's also a bit of a creator and preserver in his/her destruction.   Get your popcorn out in other words with Maya!  It's predictable and always entertaining if You can appreciate it.

Edited June 11, 2024 by Joseph Maynor

[Phil]

10 minutes ago, Joseph Maynor said:

@Phil  I feel like it's better to know what thought is than to be against thought.  The former treats thought as almost an artform -- the latter, ironically, is afraid that somehow the thought is going to throw them off course -- as if this were even possible!  This is a misplaced cause or blaming or shaming if there ever was one.  It's a sneaky way to win.  That's what Maya or Samsara is.  Every separate self engages in this to the extent it's em-bodied as a separate self.  It's seated in the body as an individual.  One can play this game, but it's still a form of game and so it creates, sustains, and destroys like all games do.  Nobody wins a streak for very long in any game.

 

34 minutes ago, Phil said:

Even now, as what’s being said is there is no individual, there aren’t separate selves… On behalf of an individual there is a screen, an internet, electricity, a universe and what’s being said is a philosophy, existentialism, someone’s personal beliefs or interpretation or even religious or spiritual or what someone knows, realized, or discovered or what an individual might know, realize or discover. 

🤍

[Rose]

9 hours ago, Phil said:

Misidentification. 

Can you get  an average Joe to stop identifying with their thoughts? Or does it make sense to explain to them their addiction? 

[Phil]

@Rose

“Their addiction” would be based on there being a separate self, addicted, or whose addiction an addiction is. 

 

Anyone can meditate. 

 

Phil was as average Joe as they come. 

 

Direct experience wise, you meditate or you don’t. That’s the entirety of meditation. 

Likewise, “the addiction” is directly experienced or not. 

There isn’t “someone else” which is addicted or meditates (or not). 

[Rose]

12 hours ago, Mandy said:

Law of attraction does not serve a separate self. It will only make bigger and louder what is sought to be covered up or gotten rid of. 

Whom does the law of attraction serve? Could you please explain this?