Mandy Posted May 19 Share Posted May 19 On 5/17/2024 at 1:58 PM, noomii said: Yes I like animals Ever notice how they are so easy to love? Quote Mention Youtube Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noomii Posted May 21 Author Share Posted May 21 On 5/19/2024 at 11:09 PM, Mandy said: Ever notice how they are so easy to love? Yeah, thank god they don't talk like us Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy Posted May 22 Share Posted May 22 On 5/21/2024 at 11:10 AM, noomii said: Yeah, thank god they don't talk like us Or thank God we don't expect them to. Quote Mention Youtube Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noomii Posted June 4 Author Share Posted June 4 I feel so stuck. The only peace I feel is in sleep but my sleep pattern is so fucked up. Last night I dreamed I was in a circle with people and then a gorilla raped me 🤦♀️I thought just before he attacked me that I have to just surrender to it but then when he tried to rape me I just panicked in fear and screamed until the people tried to stop it and then I woke up. I think the dream had something to do about how I felt despair and out of control before going to sleep. I also dreamed there was a bear charging at us and I ran to one of the toilets with only a thin wall around and I told the girl that was with me what she has to do because otherwise we will be attacked and I felt worry about her not doing that, then the bear disappeared. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted June 4 Share Posted June 4 The universe is not against you. The universe is for you. People aren’t trustworthy or not, they’re illusory. With daily morning meditation less and less luggage is picked up during the day & so there’s less and less to check in and less and less picked up. Exercise is also a direct drawing upon Source. 🤍 Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noomii Posted June 4 Author Share Posted June 4 3 hours ago, Phil said: The universe is not against you. The universe is for you. How to see that the universe is for me? Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy Posted June 4 Share Posted June 4 @noomii Do you trust instinct or intuition? Quote Mention Youtube Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noomii Posted June 4 Author Share Posted June 4 10 minutes ago, Mandy said: @noomii Do you trust instinct or intuition? I don't know, both Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted June 4 Share Posted June 4 3 hours ago, noomii said: How to see that the universe is for me? With some brevity, what are three ways you’d like it to? Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noomii Posted June 5 Author Share Posted June 5 15 hours ago, Phil said: With some brevity, what are three ways you’d like it to? To feel just the way I want to feel, to be loved just as I am and to experience all that I want right now, at all times 😬 Last night I dreamed about seeing a polar bear on my walk home. I ran to a neighbours house for shelter and tried to close the door but then it came inside and I ran to another room and tried to close it but it came in there too. I think there was a brown bear too. Then I tried to hide in another room and I put in a lot of effort to keep the door shut. I asked for help from people in the house but they didn't seem to care. Not sure but these repetitive dreams are probably fear of failure that I believe will happen if I let go of control. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy Posted June 5 Share Posted June 5 There's a connection with large animals that symbolizes something deep in the psyche, that no one in my opinion has succeeded in describing very well, a bad explanation being penis envy, and a better one the Chariot theme in tarot. https://www.thetarotguide.com/the-chariot/ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/how-train-your-boyfriend/202012/why-some-girls-and-women-love-horses-so-much Quote Mention Youtube Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted June 5 Share Posted June 5 1 hour ago, noomii said: To feel just the way I want to feel, to be loved just as I am and to experience all that I want right now, at all times 😬 That’s beautiful. The astounding thing is, source is so good - that’s actually already the case. What you’re wanting is actually already actual. 1 hour ago, noomii said: Last night I dreamed about seeing a polar bear on my walk home. I ran to a neighbours house for shelter and tried to close the door but then it came inside and I ran to another room and tried to close it but it came in there too. I think there was a brown bear too. Then I tried to hide in another room and I put in a lot of effort to keep the door shut. I asked for help from people in the house but they didn't seem to care. That which one is fearing is hard to nail down, isn’t it? Thought ‘says’ it’s this, oh no now it’s that, now it’s something in a future, now it’s what might happened, now it’s that I’m not X enough, etc. The amazing thing is when one looks right at that bear, it isn’t a bear & never actually was. True effortless may be wanted, and is also actually already the case. Not caring about anyone might be wanted - and is also already the case. Not caring about what a thinker thinks might be wanted to and yes, that is already reality, already actual, already the case. Reality, source, Self, etc, is so good - thoughts could arise endlessly about just how good source is, and never ever will any thought even come close, because reality is that good. Infinite Goodness. 1 hour ago, noomii said: Not sure but these repetitive dreams are probably fear of failure that I believe will happen if I let go of control. There’s a bit of a paradox at play there. You’re in control, but your focus is on failure & fear…? Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noomii Posted June 8 Author Share Posted June 8 On 6/5/2024 at 3:52 PM, Mandy said: There's a connection with large animals that symbolizes something deep in the psyche, that no one in my opinion has succeeded in describing very well, a bad explanation being penis envy, and a better one the Chariot theme in tarot. https://www.thetarotguide.com/the-chariot/ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/how-train-your-boyfriend/202012/why-some-girls-and-women-love-horses-so-much Sorry I struggle a lot with reading now so I didn't read the links fully, might go back to it later. I don't get why you mentioned penis envy, I don't think I've experienced that. I can relate to the key meanings in chariot reversed card except for coercion. Where does the tarot card explain what large animals symbolizes? Was there something specific you wanted to say with the link about horses? I no longer have the same interest for animals as I did as a child. I used to ride horses for a while and had my own bunnies until I lost interest. I have often felt worry around especially warmblood horses that I feel have a specific energy, which usually makes me feel more worry and insecurity. Horses also feel what you feel and is affected by that. I prefer the giant coldblooded horses because they feel very relaxed. In the same way, I love men that feel relaxed and confident, simply because it makes me feel better and more relaxed. I feel very turned off by insecurity that I feel in men I'm with, maybe because it makes me more aware of the insecurity I already feel (that I don't want to feel). I dream about horses regularly. The other day I dreamed I was going to lead a white horse on the road without halter, I was holding her by the neck. Then I felt worry that she would run away, so I tried to put on a halter but it didn't go well. The horse felt worried. Then a car approached us on the road. I felt worry and the horse turned around to the opposite direction. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy Posted June 8 Share Posted June 8 @noomii It's not the penis that's being envied it's the perceived confidence, which is actually just the lack of self doubt and insecurity. Horses are the Chariot, they were the first means of more powerful transportation humans utilized, which is why engines are still measured in horsepower. You want to know that you have the strength and sureness to get where it is you want to go, but it's your own strength and sureness that you're scared of. Not that that's you, or says anything is wrong with you, and that therein is the strength and sureness. The confidence and sureness wanted from a male is simply lack of self doubt or insecurity. It is where it is not, like the value of a bowl or a home is in the space, where it's not. Yoni envy. 😂 Express the jealousy. Quote Mention Youtube Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted June 9 Share Posted June 9 On 6/5/2024 at 9:41 AM, noomii said: To feel just the way I want to feel, to be loved just as I am and to experience all that I want right now, at all times 😬 If a thought arises to the contrary, let it go. Quote Mention YouTube Website Sessions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noomii Posted June 10 Author Share Posted June 10 On 6/5/2024 at 5:50 PM, Phil said: That’s beautiful. The astounding thing is, source is so good - that’s actually already the case. What you’re wanting is actually already actual. That which one is fearing is hard to nail down, isn’t it? Thought ‘says’ it’s this, oh no now it’s that, now it’s something in a future, now it’s what might happened, now it’s that I’m not X enough, etc. The amazing thing is when one looks right at that bear, it isn’t a bear & never actually was. True effortless may be wanted, and is also actually already the case. Not caring about anyone might be wanted - and is also already the case. Not caring about what a thinker thinks might be wanted to and yes, that is already reality, already actual, already the case. Reality, source, Self, etc, is so good - thoughts could arise endlessly about just how good source is, and never ever will any thought even come close, because reality is that good. Infinite Goodness. That resonates but is not seen. I don't feel ready or willing right now to investigate direct exprience or contemplate. On 6/5/2024 at 5:50 PM, Phil said: There’s a bit of a paradox at play there. You’re in control, but your focus is on failure & fear…? Am I in control of everything? If I was really in control of everything then I think I would have a very different experience. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noomii Posted June 10 Author Share Posted June 10 On 6/8/2024 at 8:57 PM, Mandy said: @noomii It's not the penis that's being envied it's the perceived confidence, which is actually just the lack of self doubt and insecurity. Horses are the Chariot, they were the first means of more powerful transportation humans utilized, which is why engines are still measured in horsepower. You want to know that you have the strength and sureness to get where it is you want to go, but it's your own strength and sureness that you're scared of. Not that that's you, or says anything is wrong with you, and that therein is the strength and sureness. The confidence and sureness wanted from a male is simply lack of self doubt or insecurity. It is where it is not, like the value of a bowl or a home is in the space, where it's not. Yoni envy. 😂 Express the jealousy. It doesn't really feel like I'm jealous of a males confidence or maybe I'm just not aware of it? More likely that I feel jealousy about women because I see them as a threat and competition Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy Posted June 10 Share Posted June 10 4 minutes ago, noomii said: It doesn't really feel like I'm jealous of a males confidence or maybe I'm just not aware of it? More likely that I feel jealousy about women because I see them as a threat and competition A threat and competition for what exactly? Quote Mention Youtube Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noomii Posted June 10 Author Share Posted June 10 Just now, Mandy said: A threat and competition for what exactly? Love and attention by men Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy Posted June 10 Share Posted June 10 @noomii Are men the source of love? Why is love and attention wanted or expected to come from men specifically? Quote Mention Youtube Channel Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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