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Posted

I stress myself a bit too much. Today a mentally ill woman came and knocked on my door and freaked out and slammed the door shut. I panicked badly. I freaked out and I began sweating terribly. I was hyperventilating.This woman is obsessed with me since 3 years and stalks me around whenever wherever she sees me. Today she knocked on my door and I have avoided her multiple times in the last few years and I feel incredibly scared and nervous. She will always ask a creepy question "are you going to work?" she will ask that question to my whole family and every time it's the same question. Nobody talks to her and everyone avoids her and considers her creepy. I saw her face today and I creeped the fuck out because I hasn't seen her in last 3 months and so it was a shock.

I have had multiple stalkers over the past 5 years. 

It has resulted in me becoming fearful, anxious, paranoid and more of a loner. I have become extremely avoidant socially. This is not the first time a woman stalked me and in the past there were up to 4 random dudes and one my second ex. 

I escape into my own world and avoid socializing. I'm mentally ill too but at least I don't knock on other's doors at unexpected hours. 

So basically I'm an autistic INFJ BPD sigma Pisces female with anger and CPTSD issues. Wow wow. 

My plate looks full. I Couldn't have been weirder than that. Now I get why I'm so idiosyncratic. 

Posted

To deal with it is to assume it’s true and must be dealt with. 


Instead of dealing with it, inspect it, dispel the beliefs underlying the behaviors & actions, since that’s what you actually want to change. 
 

Start with simplicity. Acknowledge that there are underlying beliefs. 

 

Paranoia is a secondary belief. It’s still  suppression of the guidance. It’s a rationalization (the discord felt is because of other people).

 

Stalkers is a tertiary belief. It’s a rationalization of the paranoia. 

 

All of the beliefs arise from the fundamental self judgement and the belief you know the judgment is true. 

 

Life is easier in acknowledging a belief isn’t true, as what’s wanted can be. 

Posted

@Phil it's not paranoia if you are actually being stalked. 

So basically I'm an autistic INFJ BPD sigma Pisces female with anger and CPTSD issues. Wow wow. 

My plate looks full. I Couldn't have been weirder than that. Now I get why I'm so idiosyncratic. 

Posted
34 minutes ago, Reena said:

@Phil it's not paranoia if you are actually being stalked. 

An experience of paranoia is an experience of paranoia, whether being stalked or not. Though often related, one doesn’t equate to the other. Someone could be stalked and not experience paranoia. Someone be stalked and experience paranoia. Someone could not be stalked and experience paranoia. Someone could not be stalked and not experience paranoia. 

 

There are laws against stalking (in your country) and support from the police and many free organizations as well. If you would like info let me know, happy to share. 

Posted

I tried to sleep but I couldn't sleep well because I was thinking about that woman who was chasing me. 

 

Her creepy  face kept appearing in my sleep and I felt uneasy,restles and scared. 

 

Why the fuck would you stalk someone to their door? 

 

I kept looking at the door knob worrying if it was bolted or not.

 

So basically I'm an autistic INFJ BPD sigma Pisces female with anger and CPTSD issues. Wow wow. 

My plate looks full. I Couldn't have been weirder than that. Now I get why I'm so idiosyncratic. 

Posted

@Reena

If there is interest for bodily preservation, protection, well-being, allow intelligence - learn self defensive for free via youtube etc. Allow it to be enjoyable, fun and educational too. Practice and feel into the self-evident confidence of allowing as you do. 

 

If there is interest in mental well-being, let it go (the stalking) simply because it’s discordant. Allow what arises, underlying conditioning / beliefs, to be expressed without self judgement or condemnation and or projection. If, in terms of momentum, that occurs - simply be aware of the thoughts, and don’t judge that it is occurring. This is allowing what is old and discordant to empty. Emptying isn’t a doing. Holding on, clutching, clenching, contracting is more of a doing. 

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