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Nahm Banned Me For No Reason or was a mistake

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Hey guys and Nahm, I believe there was a mistake.  Somebody banned my account @Solipsistic Consciousness.  I went on and it said it was banned for multiple accounts.  But I only had that one account until I got banned.  Then, I made this one.  There was no warning or anything.  I was instantly banned for no reason, which was a shame.


I think Nahm banned me on purpose because I reached out to Cupcake or Preety saying that her favorite member Emerald on the Actualized forum was back.  I told her she was welcome to come back since Emerald is now active on that other forum, so I do not see how this could be bannable as it does not go against the rules.


I honestly think this was a misunderstanding.  I probably should have just private messaged Cupcake to let her know that her old friend on the other forum was now back instead of making that info public.


If this issue could be resolved, I would greatly appreciate it.




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@Solipsistic Consciousness  





I will never go back to Actualized.org. 


I'm married to this forum and I'll be here. 


Sometimes people take each other for granted and only miss them when they are gone. 


I always feel like I am not of much value to people when I'm living and breathing. People usually miss me when I'm dead and suddenly I'm valuable again, it's a strange phenomenon. It reminds me of Kurt Cobain. They're always famous after they're dead and gone. Suddenly everyone misses them. But nobody cared for them when they were screaming in pain. I think this is human nature. We're never satisfied with what we have but we think it's valuable when we lose it. 


A similar phenomenon happened with all of my exes. I would get messages from them after they had dumped me long ago. They would complain about me incessantly and once I was gone, they would write me how much they miss me. They would want me back. I would suddenly mean something to them. It's almost like - hate me first, love me later. Most of my exes were narcissists using me for whatever needs. 


I think it's just another plot twist in the narcissist mind game. They first show disdain and contempt for someone who shows them respect and decency. Then they take them for granted, treat them like dirt. When the person is gone, they miss them and want them back because they feel powerless without someone to bash and mistreat. 


There's a saying - distance makes the heart grow fonder. 


When I'm away from people, they like me a little more. When I'm closer to people, I'm a nobody. 


This post reminded me of —


Distant telephone calls from people who want me back. I hear familiar voices, a crack in my voice, a quiver in my throat. Tears rolling down my cheeks. Why now? 



I wonder if humans are even ever capable of true love. Or all of it is just narcissistic love. Love of the ego. Love for the ego. Love by the ego. 



Cherish what you have and value others more than yourself. Don't be so proud, we're just a speck of dust, mere mortals who succumb to lust. 


Everyone should feel loved. Love does not measure, does not count, doesn't carry standards, doesn't treat one child as a golden child and the other as unwanted. 


Love is not love when you don't love them for who they are but love them for the purpose they serve. 


Love does not pawn people as objects of purpose and value, sorry that's elitism. 


True love is loving weakness and giving to those who need. True love is empathy not adulation. 




Edited by Cupcake
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At this point I should just label all narcissists as trolls who are trolling me with their fake love and just be done with them. And their gaslighting. 


Goodbye narcissists. You won't have luck in having me. Your mind games won't work. I'll be with those who truly respect me and want me, who truly wish to understand me and want to create harmony with me. 


Rest can kiss me Goodluck. 



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Regarding Emerald, I  am her subscriber. I can reach out to her on her YouTube whenever I want. I don't need Leo's precious elitist forum for that, you know the one of a kind forum(chuckles). 


Tell Leo that I'm married to Actuality of Being and Actuality of Being is my husband, he can talk to my husband if he wishes to, Lmao. 


I'm glad I am out of Leo's dictatorial regime, he can have fun enslaving people under his cult. 

He labels people like me as "offenders." 

For a persecutor everyone is an offender, just like for a hammer, everyone is a nail.. 


Tell Leo that I'm very happy in my new place, he might be sick with worry, a truly caring person that he is after all. Ease his worries. 



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@Solipsistic Consciousness the people who are looking for me you can tell them that I'm Cupcake on Actuality of being Forum. 

People seem to be looking for me on this thread. Tell them so their curiosity is satisfied and finish this lame chapter. 





And if they want to contact me directly, they can use my Snapchat contact name which is in the signature below. 



Edited by Cupcake
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On 2/12/2023 at 8:06 PM, Phil said:

@Solipsistic Consciousness

Hi & sorry about that! It’s fixed. There were 20 or so blocked IP addresses from someone creating multiple accounts and your IP was almost the same and added mistakenly. 

@PhilThank you so much! Much respect from me for fixing that and giving me my account back! Thank you so much!

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31 minutes ago, Solipsistic Consciousness said:

Nahm is Phil.  Nahm was his name on the Actualized forum, which was where I knew him from.  He gave some good advice to me there and here of course.  I am glad I am here.

Lmao.. 😃 @Mandy has been living under the rock for so long.😁🤣 Can't believe it. She was wondering where Nahm went.

Jokes aside, she knows Phil, ahem Nahm. 


Edited by Cupcake
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