Dealing with boredom

[Someone here]

Lately I'm dealing with extreme boredom and listless state of being . The days are alike. The nights are alike .same fucking routine I go through every single day .and it's mixed with a bit of anhedonia. I don't feel pleasure that much when I eat my favourite ice cream .even smoking ..yup .even my biggest joy of life from smoking is lost .It doesn't get me that high anymore. Also porn is becoming boring . The same fake boobs with the same fake moans .it's fucking disgusting at this point. 

I went to my mums house last night  and we got talking about what we remember about my childhood. I remember waking up early Christmas mornings and hearing the birds singing outside..I used to lay there for ages too excited to even get out of bed. Then when I finally did..there’d be a pillowcase at the bottom of my bed stuffed with presents. I miss my childhood. It was pure heaven .I was happy for no reason at all.  But as I get older. Things are becoming more of same old same old .nothing  is exciting. Or worth the fuss .

 

[Mandy]

Aww, everyday is Christmas, and you're still a kid. Why not get a job somewhere or take extra courses? It will automatically make leisure time seem like way more a treat. 

[Someone here]

@Mandy I'm too lazy for that . I barely able to get out of bed in the morning and go to college .

[Mandy]

@Someone here Have you ever listened to Mel Robbins? You might find her really helpful right now. https://www.youtube.com/@melrobbins

 

 

[Someone here]

14 minutes ago, Mandy said:

@Someone here Have you ever listened to Mel Robbins? You might find her really helpful right now. https://www.youtube.com/@melrobbins

 

 

Checked her content quickly. Seems very promising and exactly what I need now .

Thanks mandy .

[Mandy]

@Someone here You're welcome. 😊

[Phil]

19 hours ago, Someone here said:

I used to lay there for ages too excited to even get out of bed. Then when I finally did..there’d be a pillowcase at the bottom of my bed stuffed with presents

Given that you knew the pillow case was there before you looked, and knew what presents were in it before looking in the pillowcase or unwrapping them, and already knew what it would be like playing with them… what exactly was so exciting?

 

[Someone here]

6 hours ago, Phil said:

Given that you knew the pillow case was there before you looked, and knew what presents were in it before looking in the pillowcase or unwrapping them, and already knew what it would be like playing with them… what exactly was so exciting?

 

Idk .I was still innocent. Few pennies from my dad was enough to make me happy . I would buy a chocolate bar and call it a day .

But nowadays I really need to do some extreme shit to feel okay .like looking at porn for hours on end.  Smoking like a mofo .etc. 

I notice there is an inverse curve between my age and my happiness levels. The more I grow up..it becomes harder to be fulfilled. 

[Phil]

7 hours ago, Phil said:

Given that you knew the pillow case was there before you looked, and knew what presents were in it before looking in the pillowcase or unwrapping them, and already knew what it would be like playing with them…

 

Did you in fact actually know all that? 

[Someone here]

13 minutes ago, Phil said:

Did you in fact actually know all that? 

 

7 hours ago, Phil said:

Given that you knew the pillow case was there before you looked, and knew what presents were in it before looking in the pillowcase or unwrapping them, and already knew what it would be like playing with them… what exactly was so exciting?

 

No . 

[Phil]

@Someone here

Maybe there’s a relationship between innocence, knowing, not knowing, excitement, boredom & pessimism.