heartdominance Posted June 1, 2023 Share Posted June 1, 2023 Today I received the question:"How do you choose a woman? Are there criteria for an ideal woman for you?" Purely intuitive. The woman that asked me this question today I have absolutely zero interest in. She is very beautiful. Being beautiful isn't special (its quite a commonality, I guess if she were the only beautiful woman her value would be perceived as much higher), its not an ability you've worked particularly hard on other than having good genetics moreover if you are working hard on it, it means you're a brainwashed zombie that I still love because you're just a little kitty that needs looking after, however I have no interest in you as you provide me zero stimulation. It doesn't mean I need mental stimulation, sometimes quite the opposite, again I said its purely intuitive, call it consciousness connection, consciousnesses merging into one symbiotic telepathic flow of undeniable whatever I don't care. This is something that CANNOT be faked like some women try, if I'm a dude that's always analysing the present moment it means I'm analysing all of my internal permutations and comparing it constantly with the outside world and continually updating my perception of the character of reality (not just you) it means that I am switching object permanence on and off all the time and continually moving to a more evolved picture, unless of course you have me in some kind of spell, which is always more possible post that consciousness connection however I've learned from my experiences in many instances here, thrown forgiveness powder into the washing machine and now its all in the dryer and I'm simply waiting for the right amount of time until the psychological permutations clothes dry then i'll put em back on and get on my merry way continually learning and updating my perception about life so that when its time for me to leave this proverbial abyss called universal life I've done what's right and true relative to the core makeup of my being (not a failing society) at its highest frequency and my state of growth, thus paid my dues to this universe, upon my return from the place in which I came post physical life here which all has a rubber stamp of "who cares its happening and has happened already anyway cool let's do it", enter Jimi Hendrix "Purple Haze". Rules for this journal: there will be no sharing of photos there will be no sex stories this is purely a practical dot point journal where I learn more about myself after say the 100th entry after synthesising those first 100 or however many entries were in that area. Maybe 'after' the 100th entry I'll have a long list but hey most things like common sense will cancel out so many obvious things you would put in the list. I mean, do I really need to say that you should not want to be a psychologically conditioned puppet that is totally warped relative to the times of your culture having little to any integration on the last few centuries? Don't worry I don't either but I have a lot more than most thankfully for you heh. Much love. But that's not black and white either, nothing is per se, I'm not much of a hog though when it comes to building a beaver dam for a gal that is super, super "makeup conscious" like I'd rather a woman that wears absolutely zero makeup, I have to ask the question regarding why you're wearing so much makeup as it means you have only had experience with guys and a social circle that are just superficial zombies which is exactly what I try to escape the majority the time hahaha but seriously, that's coca cola I'd just drink on a strict diet, I don't want anything that is analogous to that and there are so many interesting creative examples of that which I don't want my two beaver fangs for these logs of philosophical life to entertain. I've even linked this journaling space to a dating profile and I find it just so fucking hilarious that I've done that ahahaha. The world is not flat, just,.... wakeup with me and everything I promise, will be all good. Peace out, much love. Oh, and that means there's a possibility she might read this, if she is, darl, don't get offended, getting offended means that right now in your life you're not quite ready for a truly, truly deep and intimate relationship, that's Cosmopolitan don't want the egg shells magazine 101 babe, do the Wim Method, self-enquiry work, and heck, if you're super open minded there, I'm super open minded so why on earth would you even get offended by my initial reaction? If you can show super open mindedness that isn't faked, that is just who you are and want to be because you're in alignment with your core purpose in life, heck darl that's precisely the psychological environment that is going to create the consciousness connection that I'm talking about, but you should want that to naturally occur too and if it doesn't occur naturally you should just be like "oh it wasn't meant to be" and move on, you should be happy that you're not following something that isn't true like so many people do which is why the Jerry Springer show as I talk about haphazardly in my Book I, II, III and whatever journal. And please for the love of God don't get damn jealous, Christ, you're living your existence, you have your own UNIQUE trajectory, and this is for any gal, who cares if I'm not the one, just go and enjoy and whether I'm in alignment with you I'm in alignment and if I'm, I'm not and that's okay and I still love yah and if you can love the rest of existence with me too, in absence or connection, all power to us both Oprah Winfrey style babe, we just don't want to be on Doctor Phil in two decades time or less, probably less, talking about our failing marriage because we didn't follow the signs early on. Okay hun, I've finished the coca cola that I was talking about above, for this particular phenomenological expression here, the clothes are out of the dryer, and I'm ready to leave the laundromat. Stay dry babe. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartdominance Posted June 1, 2023 Author Share Posted June 1, 2023 Template following: Clear title Date and time Clear example Clear lessons Brief analysis Method of loci on experience that I build on more and more each time 1. INTUITION (as per the previous post, slightly further elaboration as an established point) Date and Time: June 1st , 12pm - Visit to a Magic Store (love em) Found my way into a "Witch, Warlocks, Magical Stones, Smells and Sounds" store. Really enjoyed and appreciated the well organised thematic architecture as I always do for such stores and the feelings they impress upon me. Complimented the lady who I seemed to easily workout was her handy work, observant of the bias I had where I was automatically partially categorizing her as a knowledgeable woman on such things while simultaneously observant of the first discrepancy I noticed in the store that would bring suspicion to such a thing. The music itself was not compatible with the design and purpose of the store. Intuitive polite questioning from me immediately alerted to me however that yes I was right, there were gaps missing between the purpose of the store and her purpose there. Aka, she wasn't a hardcore but further than this, neither was the most knowledgeable person there that actually had an ego around the issue. However, I complimented his ego on the knowledge he did have because I was emotionally sensitive to the reputational relationship he had with the two women that worked in the store. Upon further questioning though, his ego did become confronted when he quickly realised he wasn't able to intellectually keep up with me, emotionally sensitive to his ego usually feeling smarter than others I pulled back, made room for a gap then politely left the store after shaking his hand and sharing names. There were many, many, like hundreds of intuitions even I was having while in the store, and I felt that the woman as well felt that and because she had an ego about looking bad at her job she put her guard up as, but its a waste of time to go into them all I will just add it to method of loci then remember to prompt myself with the associations when I re-read this sentence. Lessons: Always follow your intuition Don't be an idiot and follow your intuition when you don't have experience in such things Continually update your understanding on how to advance your intuition which includes many important categories which require enormous self-discovery and introspective research such as awareness, emotional intelligence, phenomenology, contemplation, psychism and otherwise one of the most important being energy awareness, processing (the most difficult one I've struggled with as per my recent noted breakthroughs in yesterdays post in my Book I, II, III, IV journal) For today's example, looks can be deceiving Message to the ladies: You can do everything right and get absolutely no where with me (not that I am hitting on anyone here yal just know I have no filter so don't take things I say too literally) because you're too outcome dependent instead of developing the intuition where you are centered in your core and speaking from your core where a woman would be if she was truly devoted as she should be if she were working in such a store. An example of how a woman can do everything right and get no where: Meet Jane (her name has been changed), she's an extremely beautiful woman, she's intelligent, she's clearly an organised and disciplined woman with a strong sense of responsibility that are all positive qualities that I am attracted to however my intuition says she's just not right for me so I'm not even going to bother responding to her at all. This is her profile description, perfectly fine, reasonable, absolutely nothing wrong with it, she's true to herself relative to her inner truth up to this point in her life and she should be very proud for all of her accomplishments in life up to this point. I am just not interested though. And its not because she has a child as I'm a very giving, family oriented guy that's even thought about adopting if the conditions to do otherwise for example were impossible. "Hello-hello!) I still came here and I'm glad about it! :) My name is Jane (name removed), I'm # years old and I work as a graphic designer in a printing house. I'm not used to sitting still and waiting for a miracle, so I have another job that brings money - I work as a photographer. No, no, I'm not one of those women who work 24/7 and don't pay attention to anything else in this life) I do both of my work very easily and efficiently, it doesn't take me much time and effort, but for that I I get decent pay. I have been living alone with my son for 10 years now, so I cannot afford to let my child live in poverty. He is quite an adult and independent boy, but like any parent, I will help him as long as I can do it. In my free time, I go in for sports, learn languages (English and French), go to the cinema, theater, roller-skate or ice-skate, mini trips to viken ;)) I can talk about myself for a long time and interestingly, because I have lived an interesting life not 20 years old, but I am sure that it is better to get to know a person personally, and not from a " questionnaire" that a person fills out. I will be glad to text or email anytime, because my laptop is almost always near me ;)" This is her email to me, trying to engage me intellectually, however the reason why I'm choosing not to respond is because I don't feel she's truly spent much time understanding what I've shared, I just feel like she's just formed a category in her mind about who I am off some loose points at an abstract level but hasn't really tapped into her intuition about how to engage with me. Again, like her profile a PERFECTLY reasonable email, there's absolutely nothing wrong with it in fact some would be impressed however intuitively, I trust my being informing me that she's not truly centered in who she is in the way she's communicating. "Often we have illusions about how and where we should find love. We create perfect scenarios and expect them to come true. But it is when we stop actively looking, when we simply open ourselves to the world and trust our feelings, that love can suddenly appear to us. Sometimes love comes into our lives through someone we didn't even know we had. It may be a friend, colleague, neighbor, or just a stranger who happens to be there at the right time and place. And in that moment we realize that this is the feeling that changes our idea of happiness and fills us with energy, and what do you believe?" I don't need a woman to be intellectual at all, actually now that I've processed this, as much as I follow intuition, I want to be with a woman who is really intuitive and is super self aware here as it means she's developed enough experience to really engage with me in a way that is going to be compatible with the love I need as much as I too am also learning to become compatible with her so that I can give her the love that she needs that describes why we're even coming together for a relationship in the first place. And intuition isn't something you SAY you have it is an ACTION, it FLOWS as unconsciously as blood flows, and just as blood flow can be controlled, it looks totally unnatural in the moment and is going to just come across as weird when you're really trying to control your blood flow just as it would when you're TRYING to control your intuition and imagine it at its full heights here. So, very simply. Intuition for her (a woman that is compatible with me), intuition for me. DONE DEAL! No, I'm not saying she's not intuitive, she's obviously worked out in her intuition that I'm a guy she should email, though she's not tapping into her intuition to truly communicate with me WHERE I AM and most importantly, WHERE SHE IS. Much love. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartdominance Posted June 1, 2023 Author Share Posted June 1, 2023 (edited) Invulnerable Jerk Sings Amazing Grace (just created now off the cuff, hope yal enjoy) And no I'm not some invulnerable jerk ha, actually if I'm to be honest I don't know how vulnerable I am on a scale of 1-10, compared to most people I know, you know, I'm pretty confident about being more vulnerable than most just because I'm confident that I'm in tune with what's real within (more than most) and that's all I really try to do when I talk and then grow from those experiences; and remember yeah, I don't have much of a filter. Ha my father was wayyyyyy worse than me haha I love that good hearted bastard and miss him greatly! Here's Amazing Grace from the Invulnerable Jerk anyhow, I've got a lotta work ahead of me, did it in one take, looking forward to where I'll be in 100 days or somethin aye. It's really just energy work (as per all journals I've created so far and their contents along with what's connected to all else so far expressed on this site) for me I feel, that'll be 50% of my singing and general music progress. At present, I just don't really care that much about stereotypes regarding peoples automatic reactions and mostly I feel that I enjoy avoiding people that fall into stereotypical reactions, I'm looking for those deeper vibes within myself and only really want to vibe with what resonates from my centre. That's just where I am in my life right now with the passing of my father 3 months ago and its not black and white I'm still learning how to dive into and swim in the depths of the grey to workout the alignment of the path I walk in this life. I really love this song, even if its great compared to others I haven't yet reached the heights I need to reach. Sublime is inevitable but its nothing to hoorah about its really just an appreciation of excellence really, I don't really care about validation outside the dopaminergic fun of things and its better if things live in silence anyway as it helps me regroup my energy in a space that enables me to see the truth within more clearly. I'll be sharing this in the other journal at the end as previously described I'll be ordering my thoughts there. Edited June 1, 2023 by heartdominance Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartdominance Posted June 3, 2023 Author Share Posted June 3, 2023 2. CHARACTER(I said no pictures, this here is as far as I will go) The woman from this journals first post messaged me this yesterday (02/06/23) after I ignored many of her earlier messages as I express there in my first post above: “What a strong character you must have to ignore a beautiful girl who wants to talk to you after what we've shared so far. (Hello?)” (After days passing and still more messages, I still haven't responded to her. Past our initial conversing I just realised it wasn't going to work and there wasn't the moral obligation for me to give her anymore attention as I would have if I did go past that point with her) All written very quickly, still a lot of valuable stuff here. Lots, lots more stuff to infer from this one. This journal isn't as formal as the others, at least certainly not all the time. A lesson for all the gentlemen or those who haven't yet realized the path there yet... She’s honestly one of the most beautiful women I have ever laid eyes on, her face is honestly remarkable and definitely zero digital photoshop/masks/or-whatever-they-use-these-days but gentlemen, you want to be able to call your potential wife a lady as she becomes the mother of your children. The character of a woman reflects the kind of man that she can support me in being and becoming, always remember that men. There’s the popular adage, “Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are", "Tell me your friends and I’ll tell you your future” and other ones like “You're the average of the five people spend the most time with" --- #My father has a remarkably similar personality to Dan Pena however my father comes across as far more ethical based on what I've heard about Dan just in passing without putting on my scruples on much [ as I just haven't had much time to research the guy really ]. Well let me tell you something, if your friends predict your future your wife predicts what’s going to be written on your gravestone. She’s as influential as your parents on your character and more than this, she has much greater control over your ambitions than both your parents and friends (unless you’re in partnership with any one of them), which means she has the power to both destroy your ambitions and your life both directly and indirectly. Granted, she’s choosing an admirable man to hit on, however she does not mirror the attributes that are going to help maintain the present and potential future greater strength of this man nor would I be mirroring her potential strength if I gave her any attention based on this kind of behaviour. There’s other messages from her as well however this one is most pertinent to discussion, I’ve ignored and will continue to ignore them all. I have absolutely zero interest. Yes, of course I did initially, and I got a good look at myself when I tried to force myself to imagine the positive possibilities with her, however I then actually decided to learn to listen to my intuition as I have expressed and well, life has me moving in a more intelligent direction now as I should be. I had a moment of weakness that I have and will continue to now turn into a moment of strength across all my potential dating choices now. And gentlemen, this isn’t even a case of “you can look (and masturbate) but you can’t touch” or “well one night stands right?!?! I'm a player yeah!?!?! I'm learning to be a player for my future wife yeah?!?!?!?”, in order to truly live a life where you’re chasing the depths of your potential you must slowly overtime build a deep understanding of how every decision you make affects you and when I say “affects you” I mean it cognitively, psychologically, emotionally and in all ways energetically as an opportunity cost. If you’re “pro porn and proud” will it also means you’re “pro missing out on the better alternate life” you otherwise would be living if we subtracted all those past related decisions around porn and analogously, then inserted all of the better decisions you made by just contemplating the further seconds required to make the better life decision that led to a better life including finding that dream gal that measured up and in measuring up you also measured up to her because you also made those intelligent decisions that made you attracted to her in the first place, you see? If you didn’t make those better decisions, you wouldn't measure up to the woman you truly want deep down that complements your life rather than just complements your sex drive. Physical attractiveness is like candy or any other addictive substance, they put em out in the front of every well marketed store, sometimes for free to get you addicted first before they’ll even charge you so you build unearned positive associations about them that invariably leads to the destruction of your life like a pack a day of smokes that we don’t yet have nicotine patches for other than developing our prefrontal cortex. Lung cancer is kids you shouldn’t have had, a mortgage and a woman that you’re trauma bonded with where neither of you have properly earned one another’s respect for one another to genuinely want to be lovingly responsible for the other. Don’t just look for the red flags in women as is highly popularised by ironically highly incompetent males for Christ’s sake look for the green lights you should be following in your own to truly be compatible for the woman you’d deeply want to green light and have the respect of for her to green light you. Take this in deeply (to be) gentlemen. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartdominance Posted June 3, 2023 Author Share Posted June 3, 2023 (edited) 4. NO PLASTIC SURGERY OUTSIDE OF CORRECTIVE SURGERY A DIFFERENT WOMAN'S MESSAGE TO ME: "The thought of our passionate encounter makes my heart beat faster and my nerves tense with anticipation. I long to feel your hot kisses and gentle touches, so that our passion turns into a whirlwind of unforgettable pleasure." I feel bad for this woman, like genuinely bad for her so really, sincerely I have genuine empathy for the fact she received bad liposuction. I get so many messages from women who have had plastic surgery, unless that same woman strives to build an intimate connection and not merely equate sex as the means of discovering intimacy all she's going to get from our encounter if I were to hypothetically play along is the sexual encounter which potentially brings momentary intimacy followed by my departure if we don't have or are genuinely building a strong foundation around genuine deep consciousness to consciousness intimacy of mutual understanding around everything that drives the highest symbiotic connection between every aspect of our interacting nervous systems. There's nothing wrong with plastic surgery at the surface level, however in order to build a strong connection with me that is beyond me simply appreciating you like a puppy on an emotional level, say the purpose for us conversing and me sharing my own inner dialogue in a free spirited way, you've gotta be unplugged, wanting to be unplugged or working towards and genuinely intrigued as to how to get there more and more otherwise you're just going to have a lot of ego backlashes and then blame ME for those ego backlashes when I've done literally nothing wrong other than just express myself honestly, truly and in integrity with my true self and any empathy that I legitimately owe to the situation. Getting plastic surgery shows that you're zombie sheep, a cardboard cartoon cutout just shipped straight out of the factory called cultural brainwashing. That's all. Brief elaboration on "Unplugged": TRUE LOVE OF THYSELF. Edited June 3, 2023 by heartdominance Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartdominance Posted June 3, 2023 Author Share Posted June 3, 2023 (edited) And just to add to the previous post up to #4 now: the law of correspondence is always at work in our relationships, as I was talking about character towards the bottom of #3 where I was going into "GREEN/RED LIGHTS AND FLAGS" right, well for every true adjective (i.e. gratitude, appreciation, courage, more) that describes what's needed for TRULY IN DEPTH relationships just like the following the law of correspondence is also at work there. TRUE LOVE OF THYSELF = TRUE LOVE OF THY OTHER and thus in return WHAT LEVEL OF TRUE LOVE WILL BE RETURNED TO YOU FROM THEM WE CANNOT, UNDER ANY CONDITIONS BE TRULY LOVED BY ANOTHER, PERHAPS VERY MUCH LOVED, BUT NOT AT THE TRUEST POSSIBLE DEPTHS LOVED UNTIL AND OR THE DEPTHS OF THAT TRUE LOVE WE CAN RECEIVE IS ABSOLUTELY BY EVERY STRETCH OF THE IMAGINATION DEPENDENT ON HOW MUCH WE TRULY AT THE DEEPEST DEPTHS CAN, DO AND HAVE ACHIEVED TRUE SELF LOVE THIS IS WHERE COMMUNION IS NOT ONLY POSSIBLE BUT ITS THE BARE MINIMUM REQUIREMENT FOR ACHIEVING ITS TRUEST LONG TERM DEPTHS Its the meaning and purpose of marriage rather than just being a modern zombie who gets married "for the heck of buying a brand new Jerry Springer TV darl!" TRUTH < === > TRUTH Edited June 3, 2023 by heartdominance Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartdominance Posted June 3, 2023 Author Share Posted June 3, 2023 (edited) i just gave all my readers flawless logic (combined with all previous insights including about the process to follow on how to seek truth aka see Life Wisdom journal) to love themselves with such incredible intensity haha I feel like people almost feel guilty about loving themselves more or just subtract guilt if its not that or a part of some combination and insert any other or set of negative psychological nouns they've been brainwashed to feel to avoid the kind of true self love that equals nothing less than the power that lights the sun hahaha, wouldn't it be great to feel that all the time? that's what this journey is about, one small insight at a time, genuine desire to want to know how those insights work to get there, and yeah that meaning translates into our subconscious finally understanding that TRUTH about itself and more than this getting there to a level of depth where ones consciousness sees that it CANNOT BE ANY OTHER WAY when the lights finally start to turn on and then you really are rolling around in that fire being the light that creates the life and achieving that/the purpose of consciousness I talk about in the *** Life Wisdom *** journal ME GIVING YOU A LICENSE TO BE THE HIGHEST SINNER IN EXISTENCE BY MAKING A PACT WITH THE DEVIL THAT IS NONE OTHER THAN ME [ the opposite to this obviously, merely exemplifying the brainwashing that's at work in culture where this is what I see people genuinely believe when it comes to entertaining that level of self love and its in part because of parenting styles right, especially when love has ever been conditional "mom/dad/brother/sister/brother/etc gives me a hug when I do x duty for them" or create whatever variation you want of this] It's pretty sky high once these extremely simple yet profound truths are realised it feels so complicated but all it is, is the subtlest, purist most simple action of consciousness simply lighting up circuits in response to realising and understanding a truth in awareness that's all that's going to happen in the process of any enlightenment lol its literally not going to be more complicated than that its just sophisticated energy movement and metamorphosis to higher intelligence through awareness where intelligence here is just "organised multidimensional awareness" literally anything less than our highest possible enlightenment is literally just to that degree less ordered energy aka less organised multidimensional awareness where every dimension is a dimension of understanding of our awareness and our awareness on that understanding to create that dimension and its awareness that facilitates the knowledge that leads to the natural metamorphosis of energy towards higher dimensions that mirrors what we say in sheep like conformity LOOKS like higher enlightenment so simple, so pure, so (beautiful)... well, its (enlightenment which is more instead "degrees of enlightenment and in what direction and dimension) what we say is the highest form of beauty when it comes to our experience and expression of consciousness Edited June 3, 2023 by heartdominance Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartdominance Posted June 3, 2023 Author Share Posted June 3, 2023 (edited) so let me just spell out the last few posts leading from #4, especially the previous post ------ THAT ***FLAWLESS LOGIC*** AS STATED IN THE POST JUST PREVIOUS IS: (Your personal affirmation now) "The world needs me to truly love myself as deeply and as intensely as possible if I want to be loved and love to the truest most intense depths imaginable." As above so below ladies, as below so above gents Guess what happens the more this insight is integrated? The irony is the less you actually need that love from the outside but the more boundaries you have for ensuring it is only the purest form of love including the love you you naturally show towards (that) world the geometry of true consciousness and how it interacts with true meaning in its and these natural transformations aye Edited June 3, 2023 by heartdominance Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartdominance Posted June 4, 2023 Author Share Posted June 4, 2023 (edited) 5. TRUE SELF (as per the above) (and true self equals the highest possible depths equivalent to all that stuff I talked about regarding true love) Just one of the standard messages I get that clearly shows she's read my profile but isn't being herself not only that, she asks me what subjects I'm interested in even though she already knows and just wants to pretend that she hasn't read my profile so she asks me:"I am an inquisitive and intellectual person who appreciates deep conversations and new knowledge. I want to meet someone who shares my love of learning and intellectual growth. What topics are you interested in?" (she's perceiving me as an intellectual but I'm really not, I'm more a creative if anything or more me just trying to become the truest expression of consciousness, and nor am I a philosopher, though due to peoples life experiences this is how they take, interpret and make these things from their appearances) Just the intuition that she's not being her true self. Will not reply. Moreover, this kind of pretending behaviour or anything else at work here that is potentially something worth contemplating as it could cause a future relationship issue, it reveals that she's going to be showing that behaviour in the future and the relationship by various geometries. If this is how she starts a conversation with her potential future husband then this is how she will pretend with my mother (who I plan on reuniting things with as I talked briefly about in the book, etc journal). In what other ways does this however minor deceptive behaviour reveal itself in other ways? I've learned my lesson to not be a 'fixer' in a relationship as well, meaning my brain can generate an enumerable amount of scenarios that get my heart saying "yeah maybe that could work!" but you have to not be mapping from a persons circumstances rather you need to be mapping from the level of TRUE ALIGNMENT they are with those circumstances. Meaning, what level of truth is present in their lives on a scale of 1 to 100? How about love i.e. self love? And it doesn't matter if they're not totally symmetrical which should be our goal, meaning if truth is 80 love is at least 80 or above as an ideal, rather what the goal, is just as much truth there, so that can be the precursor of generating that symmetry to higher and higher levels We all struggle, I get peoples struggles, don't mess with my math too much or become too literal aye I have to learn the lesson my father missed before they hatched me (as I talk about in the Day 1 entry at the beginning of page 2) I'm a natural rescuer but I have to learn to have practical boundaries around my heart. If she had of instead messaged me something like, "Hi my name ______, I'm a little nervous about beginning this conversation but I liked what you said about this subject on your profile, I enjoy intellectual topics too (again, as I said I don't even care if the woman is intellectual or not I care about if she is natural or not) by the ways here's a stupid meme for humor would be good to hear back from you." Either we're ready to be vulnerable and speak it out or we wait until we're in a position to speak from a place of strength, either way we're both making sure we're speaking from our true selves as it then becomes a true relationship that actually aids our growth because that's what a relationship directly facilitates, that is, true growth, regardless as to how silly and non-intellectual we're being, as long as its true, truth invariably leads to REAL LIFE and not fantasy stuff (i.e. procrastination/distractions). Which is why I'm stopping this journal until after November 1st as stated in my Book Journal recently. But.... #5 wraps up this journal for now, didn't want to end on #4 (just like barfing out bad culture like its a sickness from too much alcohol/culture / cultural food poisoning ) and better to encapsulate the posts that followed from that So yeah. True Self. There's no complaining here, I mean, I'm not even really invested anywhere, just seeing how this stuff flies. I don't even message anyone anymore. I feel that maybe hey, maybe instead of going to study in Switzerland, ETH Zürich I actually do go to say Oxford uni for PhD just to find a gal even if she is a bit too much Oxford-culturalised. It's all just... I got a set of projects this year. They gotta get done. And for questions like that, its all just open-ended and I'll be much more creative about it after November 1st. its difficult to find a woman who's self aware of her being enough that she lives outside of indoctrination, ability to be socially influenced, brainwashed and so on and so fourth. Especially, especially, especially when it comes to gender roles, how they're attracted to men and how they screen men, so on and so fourth. Both men and women are terrible, and I hate the fact that women are so fucking terrible because then there exists a subset of the male population that everyone knows about where they literally practice all day and night dreaming about how they manipulate them and so on. I feel like I'm increasing my odds by going to Oxford/related but then the critical thinking question is, what are all the ways in which I'm decreasing my odds? This is where intuition after November 1st is really gotta be much more honed like I think I'm much further along compared to a few months ago, like more than ever I now realise I just have this incredibly amazing intuitions that just turn out to be spot on that in the past I didn't think it was even possible for consciousness to interpret things in that hyperdimensional way in order to generate those intuitions but now, its like my post regarding chatgpt in the Micro Lessons journal I will be as always regardless as to what happens, just be infinitely open mined in every conceivable way with every step I take towards accomplishing my goals between now and Nov 1st. number 6. that's definitely going to be: 6. Ego Aware / Self-awareness as that's really what I'm looking for in many ways but its just so difficult to come by because in all "spiritual communities" i've visited they're not ego or necessarily even self-aware its more, they're just evolving or have evolved into a new space but I'm gonna wait until after Nov 1st and let's say i hypothetically become famous with my music even though I'd really only be doing that because my father would have some disappointment there and even though he's passed and I still make my own decisions of course, like im seriously totally unplugged my heart, just as I am a rescuer, lives from a fucking place of deep honor and that's in all my relationships, so when a gal or my dad, mum, brothers right they live there or I give em a spot you know, i do my best to keep it a campfire for good story telling including too in this case the lives we've shared and progress updates inside this life and the next but you know, im still watching the world and see where it goes if i make that choice, everything there is hyper-strategic "get the shit out of the way" done / simultaneously prepare for the opposite of success that is world changing and instead just a "campfire" of fans that I have the same respect for "what is the impact i'm making in this moment, what is the impact that I want for the future? what does the past tech about this? who's the gal that's right who's gonna be the right support here. " so some are like, "oh you're too picky" or some immature, myopic citing like this and its like nah, its just alright you're a coach and you're figuring what teammates are gonna pair really well with one another for training, that's literally all this is, pairing up right with the teammate which is gonna be the right support for my life and my needs and vice versa, not just someone that's *merely supportive*, my step mom for example who was with my father until passing was an amazing wife for my father, they just fit well together, she was INCREDIBLY supportive of him, however the WIFE that suits me, wouldn't be good for my father and the WIFE that suited my father god bless his heart and his ability to have a great marriage for over 20 years, doesn't suit me until November 2nd puttin this to bed Edited June 4, 2023 by heartdominance Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartdominance Posted June 4, 2023 Author Share Posted June 4, 2023 (edited) and just so you don't think I'm like ignoring everyone, very coincidentally given directly above / last few posts I just got this message from a gal asking me two questions. firstly, after you read this post you'll realise why im so picky. When someone where I get a little "tick" by the heart/intuition, I'll invest with something like the following, there's just no way otherwise that I'd be able to devote the same attention and care to every message I received, and even saying "sorry im not interested/anymore" or some variation here, I'm not morally obligated and its not even necessarily a polite thing to do, actually its partly impolite to want it because you're asking for someones energy when they do not want to give it which is spiritually a bit morally corrupt when its certainly not owed after reading her candid profile description below, i responded with what follows from the questions mentioned after her profile description here: Profile Description - "I am a kind and peaceful woman, I like creating coziness around me. I am a tender and a little romantic woman who is ready for marriage and creating a family! I`m one of many single women, who still believe in people's sincerity, honesty and in real love. I must also admit that I'm romantic. I am interested in many things, so I have a very rich inner world and I am a creative person. In the books, I find peace, experience and wiseness of ages. I believe that we need to develop ourselves in different ways – physically, intellectually and as a personality. So I try to read as much as I can, watch different educational videos and study in different ways. Also I develop myself physically – I like running, swimming and riding a bicycles." simple straight to the point not overly trying other than expressing herself not trying to appear intelligent unless she's just doing it naturally feels like a true self expression describes true self which has at least some partial symmetry to my own And her questions to me were: How do you deal with situations in which you feel guilty towards other people? Is it possible to quench or satisfy the thirst for love and passion of a person, or is it an eternal desire that continues throughout life? written on the fly i casually wrote a "don't confuse the map with the territory" blueprint, but reflective of "true self" by not holding back like the other woman did, and if a guy player is like "well bro you're coming off way too interested" to me its like "dude im not trying to make this work im looking to see if we could be a team so just fuck off please you're a brainwashed zombie" to a player it looks like ive put in a lot of effort, im just free styling though, we're all different what looks like effort to someone is nothing to someone else other than the true expression of what's just flowing from the heart. if she doesn't reply, that means reality is informing me that we're not a good fit, the same too if I get a sense from my intuition regarding her reply that we're not for whatever reason, this is just letting nature be nature bro this isn't about manipulating reality to get a certain outcome. you're all like trying to be a player to appear cool or chill or whatever, well this is my natural chill so fuck off "The heart is a telephone that is constantly calling our minds. Sometimes we listen, other times we don’t and if we’re wise, the heart turns from being a mere telephone to an ethernet connection. Starting with awareness, we identify the rhythmic musical patterns that makeup the structure of the concert between composer, being our true self, and the orchestra we’re trying to not only handle but recreate the universe through this power of potential our spirits have been asked to occupy our attention with in this 3D materialistic plane, the beating of the hearts electrical activity in its connection with the rest of our beings. Guilt, like the rest of our emotions, is the dye in the purity of emotions created by that electrical activity in connection with our past experiences. Like a glass of water, we are forced to drink our emotions but we are not forced to learn how to handle or mature their various effects to a really high standard. Regarding guilt specifically, I handle the feeling with direct experiential action that would ameliorate the condition that relates to he guilt. If the situation is irredeemable, I would seek forgiveness on a spiritual plane and listen for answers on how to approach this this situation through the heart no matter the answer I get. Lets say I hypothetically don't receive forgiveness but I have experienced and processed the emotion in a healthy way while still feeling I want to do more because there is some lingering guilt there, then I would use the emotion to redeem the habits of my behaviour that led to the action so that future actions that caused the guilt are automatically avoided. I wouldn't say, just give lots of money to charity like some fools do. Only when we learn to listen to the heart, understand the heart and master its patterns can we truly act and live from it to its full power. When a westerner accepts this interpretation of the heart they may then struggle with whether the heart is meant to live in proper service to the mind or the other way around, I assure you however, that when you reach this level of intelligence capable of empowering the heart in this way through the mind, it is certainly the mind that is to live in service to the heart and never its opposite. If the heart can learn to tame the mind, well, there’s just no telling the kind of great being this sentience can become. In answer to your final question based on this, it is certainly the balance between accepting reality and coming to terms with the deepest truth of the self in so much as we have the awareness to both understand to this level to accept to this level or however great level we may be challenged to as it challenges different sides to the balance between acceptance and taking action." see yal november 2nd Edited June 4, 2023 by heartdominance Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michaelunity Posted June 7, 2023 Share Posted June 7, 2023 (edited) Repost: deleted to combine + add my last insight at the bottom. It's a great, great binder here it really, really is. And you can't help but give a plus to women that go out of their way to make sure you know that they're not only real but they're also invested. I promised I wouldn't reveal faces, for the rest I couldn't resist its just too adorable. Received this today along with a long erotic letter. Two shots of vodka are better than fucking one hun. I'll be back on this account July 1st. Yeah, that's when I'll be sharing that cover song listed on my first post on this account. This is because I'm sharing the cover song at the same time as I share it with my brothers, no sooner. Patience. Wisdom. Timing. Dominance. This journal and all the others with the exception of my music journal as shared in my first post on this account are all scrapped now. 6. Trust What the hell are you doing falling in love with someone that you don't even trust? That has betrayed you countless times just because they had ego backlashes and never wanted to take responsibility in any sense of the word (as well as partially in their own words, though each to their own how they judge off the cuff expressions, they said they weren't necessarily very loyal people). Go back into your childhood and figure out how that was ever possible. I mean follow your intuition sure, I mean sure as well empathise with the fact that they're just ego backlashes, non-resolution to cognitive-dissonances and more, but for the love of god what are you doing not having boundaries on your own psyche, heart and mind? INFLUENCES: I was bred to be courageous, from a young age I was skiing down the most difficult ski runs you can imagine at 7 years of age with only about two seasons of skiing under my belt, plus I had a mother I grew up with who had ego-backlashes after ego-backlashes, massive control tendency issues and it would seem like she'd go out of her way to misinterpret the things you said because of her own trauma. I love my mom deeply, I love the related woman and even women deeply, however how much of this is simply rooted in my own childhood trauma by allowing myself as an adult man to fall in love with women where they don't at all follow simple trust boundaries to build a sense of strong stability and security as the foundation for an increasingly deeper relationship? I'm also a super open minded guy, like if you know someone that's your number one person for open mindedness, I'm probably maybe three times more open minded but it has major drawbacks that I simply haven't adequately learned from and moving forward must take more responsibility for many of my weaknesses that stem from my early childhood experiences. I'm a healthy dude (now), I can bond incredibly deeply, build long term relationships and seek connections that are founded on a strong existential foundation, however I have to really be self-honest here with respect to my own emotional boundaries that need work and that because I haven't worked on them adequately enough, I'm not the only one that experiences suffering in this regard as my own lack of emotional boundaries mean I'm allowing future scenarios to take place whereby I'm not making healthy decisions over who I choose to be in strong connection with. I only want connections with those that respect extremely healthy boundaries and as much as I am taking in all the wisdom of my father's life I will also be studying all the life wisdom of my mother's life who thank god hasn't passed away yet and for the remainder of her life I will work to build a healthy relationship with under the boundaries of my own wisdom and intelligent empathy there. As I have mentioned in the past, I plan on buying her a home next year that is better than her present one, something that she can be truly happy in. Arguably you could say "well you have to have healthy emotional boundaries here", and in one sense you're absolutely right however I have the personality where in this case once I've already thought about the emotional boundaries and have adapted myself to them I have a freedom of motion that I give myself in relation to my decision making here where in this case its not going to make me poor emotionally, cognitively or financially by giving something purely out of love and its not going to make me rich in either area there either as I'm just giving out of love without any expectation of return as I know it will bring at least some partial happiness. I have to go easy on people somewhat though, because that's what I feel like I've been battling with my whole life, just other peoples bullshit, ego's, hangups and just their general inability to be self-aware enough to comprehend proper measurements between relationships and the continuity of ground for peace. This is life called humanhood and I'm learning every step here I guess. What's worse here in this equation is when you're in a relationship dealing with the ego of a person where trust hasn't been earned yet and unconsciously your ego is triggered by that and then you become the "bullshit, ego's hangups" for someone else's stuff that they then create a comment on for some random spiritual website about how they're "battling other peoples bullshit" heh. So, this as we all know was the essence of my first lesson listed in my Life Wisdom journal and is thus the perfect mirror and perfect way to finish up this journal. As I stated in that journal, TRUST is THE MOST important thing whether its trust towards ourselves, trust towards others and their trust towards themselves and others inclusive of you. This very thing creates so, so many issues on planet earth and arguably the majority of human problems its utterly ridiculous quite honestly that regardless as to how high someones IQ could be for example they're just totally incapable due a shielded ego when it comes to simply just incrementally assessing a social situation and determining intelligent means for building trust, assessing trust or departing empathically from a social connection where its been adequately determined that a situation is not a good fit for that chemistry whether in business, romance, family or otherwise. These are sensitive, sensitive mechanics as well because so much of our intuition is utilised during this process and therefore as I have repeated so many times needs to be honed in as clever "fact-checking" ways as possible so that you are on the other side of wisdom in the positive as often and as deeply as possible so per unit of time you're the "wise old man or woman" far earlier than you ever have to be. Great way to end this journal to have that direct mirror to the beginning there on the other journal. Edited June 7, 2023 by michaelunity Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michaelunity Posted June 8, 2023 Share Posted June 8, 2023 (edited) And now after the above woman did it without me even asking I'm just now openly asking every woman now after this woman following through quickly. That will be my rule from now on, if a woman wants to keep me engaged she has to get semi-engaged with me, its a serious site after-all. I really want to show her off beauty and too the women above because that's of course why they love entering beauty pageants so its only prosocial relative to biology.... But... I can't violate my own ethics... her hands though... She has beautiful hands that I've done my best to capture. Haha, for realz though. This is the second woman though in a row, the first two women that write the letter A and just letters in general kind of *off* (that's something to be suspicious about tongue in cheek). I'm pretty sure the digital age has definitely left its mark on our writing ability we're now all writing like medical doctors who for whatever reason are apparently notorious for bad hand writing haha. Okay yeah as stated, this is the end of this journal now, I just found it humorous. Checkout, the previous post for the last main personal lesson for me to follow from now on. A more specific niche lesson for me within trust is sure keep my eternal infinite openness but instead of feeling guilty or having my hero/saviour/rescuer complex activated instead use that as my means to engage with the self, enjoy exploring its own independence in consciousness and in a healthy way enjoy being creative with my own boundaries. Once I've closed that gap which opens up unhealthy vulnerabilities in my own now former attachment style, I'll now no longer fall in love solely based on my own empathy because I find that's also a big blindspot for me. That empathy, that world of another that I have the potential of falling in love with, must be compatible with the respect of wisdom and I won't entertain relationships with women anymore where there isn't that maturity or they're in a healthy way pushing for that maturity where there is just this intrinsic understanding that we're both human beings living out our lives so there is a mutual respect for our own paths, regardless as to what dynamic we wish to create inside the independent context of our relationship. A woman gets a lot by being with a guy like me. I love the unknown and I'm incredibly open moving forward in my dominance of uncharted territories all the time, so she gets to come along for that ride where I am perpetually her dominant lover raising her up, where along the way she can be my support and companion in nurturing those adventures and learn so much along the way as well as enhance my consciousness and teach me what worlds she has truly chartered and believes she can enhance my world with. I never needed a relationship. I want children, family, all that jazz that I would build my own entirely new advanced paradigm on, but I don't need a relationship unless its truly fitting and in the past, my own childhood programming has kept me from pursuing relationships that were in alignment with pursuing my own growth because I just love looking after wounded animals. It's not that I don't like looking after wounded animals anymore, because I really do, its just I gotta have better boundaries not even towards the woman as I think that's wrong, the boundaries need to simply be maturely about the wisdom on what makes a good relationship and what doesn't and simply saying, "yeah right now I don't think / or I think this is a good thing based on the conditions of what would make a good relationship" rather than just getting involved with one another because you have deep feelings for them. Wisdom and love, there's like this cool venn diagram right where there's an obvious overlap in the context of a relationship where its like, okay where love and wisdom overlap, awesome let's lock in a relationship but as the wisdom decreases, so too does the probability that the relationship will destroy our lives the more amount of love there actually is. That's the mind fuck there that really, really, really, really fucking makes me look like an utter dumbass hahaha. Anyhow, I'm learning, I'm dominating, I'm envisioning my life and pursuing my deepest purpose, things are getting real good for me again. Much love (to everyone here)... But... hahahahahahaha.... Much wisdom. (as we have now learned) Maturity. So important. So if there were a 7th lesson for this journal it would be that, however there will not be a 7th lesson as this journal has now... The end. As stated in post just previous. Back on this site July 1st. That's when the cover will be released as stated releasing it at the same time I share it with my brothers. (It's a big moment, I'll have to make sure I've got it down pat heh as they're my brothers and in our dynamic we like to make sure we're striving for excellence otherwise we definitely make the other one know about it heh, we've got this thing underneath the surface where we'd be too embarrassed (haha) to show anything that didn't reflect the mastery dad taught us to strive for and left this example in his legacy for us to remember). Edited June 8, 2023 by michaelunity Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michaelunity Posted June 8, 2023 Share Posted June 8, 2023 Oh and get this, the darl above is such a sweetie pie. I just logged in to the site and I see three messages from her (she hasn't sent me an email like the other gal yet... Wait, I'll quickly double check [there's a lot, so I don't pay too much attention its just a quick scan on originality, depth of humanhood (mostly unless intuition says otherwise) then moving on if it isn't there aka "the struggle of life is real folks let's not pretend (haha)" which is exactly what a woman gets by being with me, a whole lotta life stuff she no longer needs to worry about as I'm handling it if it isn't there): "I'm sorry I don't have any regular paper . haha so can we talk?" "Michael ?" "Are you there?" And now of course I feel obligated it wouldn't be right otherwise I'll give her a chance of course. Now I'm in the frame of where she's activated my sensitivity after that (taking the picture she did above along with her message where she's like worrying about what paper she used which shows that she's sensitive to how I respond), realising that she took a moment to be vulnerable which my nervous system then automatically empathises with after compliance and now its like, me mediating my nervous system to ensure it stays on the side of wisdom heh. This is what I've been preaching here as well for both sexes on this site, self-awareness to self-knowledge to self-wisdom (SA-SK-SW) there should be a continuous feedback loop here between the three that you genuinely, genuinely enjoy the inward world of developing within yourself outside the influence of others. And yeah she did send me an email, in fact she sent me two I totally forgot about: (1) "As I sit here thinking of you, my heart swells with love and admiration. I can't help but wonder, how emotional are you on a scale of 1 to 10? Do you feel deeply, cry easily, or wear your heart on your sleeve? Or do you keep your emotions hidden, revealing them only to me? I adore every facet of your personality, and I long to know more about your innermost thoughts and feelings. So tell me, my love, how emotional are you? I am eager to hear your answer." (2) "Imagine walking into our cozy home after a long day of work. I smile at you and invite you to a specially prepared room for relaxation. There you will find pleasant music, fragrant aromas and subdued lights, creating an atmosphere of complete tranquility. You sit on an easy chair or lie down on a comfortable table for a massage. I heat the gentle oil in my hands so that it pleasantly warms your body. Then I start massaging your shoulders, feeling every tension and annoyance you've been through all day. My hands slowly slide over your back, dissolving all fatigue and tension. I apply the perfect pressure to relax your muscles and allow you to fully rest. Each touch is filled with care and love, and I try to convey to you all my tenderness through these soft movements." So she's got a really sweetie pie nurturing nature where she's clearly signalling that she would be homemaker wife kind, which is a great trait to have don't get me wrong, I'm pretty flexible on any trait really (almost) it just depends on how everything balances out." Because she's showing a lot of interest I'm just going to take things back a notch slightly. I feel that she's cognizant of the fact that there's a lot of women on the site and that I could be talking to, she's done this to "get in" so to speak which is definitely fair considering like I'm not going to reject her from that I'm naturally much more open now however for now... I'll just take a step back and see how she handles the stress of waiting for me to respond... Not to hurt her in any way, however just to see if there's any insecurities there that maybe she may hide behind potential people pleasing tendencies. The latter here I'm screening for, and well, I'm learning to screen better just in general in light of the greater wisdom I realise I need to acclimatise to in accordance with reflections in the previous two posts. I won't look down on her or negate her if she does have insecurities that create those tendencies as opposed to them being completely natural, its just a step by step thing for me, completely flexible, adaptable and nurturing the side of me that pivots more gently, intuitively and subtly in situations, taking in greater perspectivism as opposed to feeling the need to immediately ensure that when that empathy is activated in me, I don't need to immediately just give in to that side to me. With the realisation that it doesn't always show me the truth of a situation, instead, it only shows me an aspect of truth to the situation and that I need to generate more perspective so that I arrived at balanced truth which encompasses the perspectivism of multiple aspects of my nervous system as opposed to just immediate intuitive truth. What I will do instead because I realise I am a bit more mature with respect to that feedback loop, SA-SK-SW, is I will simply guide her down her path of self-realisation with respect to me and her self-discovery process in terms of realising the truth that she wants to experience and understand with me in a way that positively reinforces the development of her own maturity which as a man this is what you need to learn how to do and the same for a woman but in a different way to the man to ensure there is complementary status in the relationship in this developmental sense. At the same time though of course, I'm also balancing this approach with what I stated about pivoting. This sweet woman's just on the cusp of about thirty years of age. Just had to end with this brilliant wisdom that I think will light up those neural networks for those that may have some gaps in this area as I did when I was a younger man but have had to basically just teach myself in light of my own very original consciousness experience I've found I have, which is cool its all good there in terms of the difference. If you think of maturity in terms of a spectrum of ways in which we can mature on the scale of total maturity we should be aiming to reach in terms of consciousness growth you want to see that final number you think you have as the intersection of the most important areas across that spectrum and there really are so many ways that are beyond regular imagination in the sense that you would probably characterise regular culture like a little baby in terms of its level of maturity. This is a great way for those that have noticed how unknowingly to myself at the time I've briefly elaborated on what would have been lesson number 7 for this journal as stated in the previous post, which again, I won't go into more in depths of as this is my final goodbye for this journal and as stated, I'll be back here July 1st to post the song. Thank me later both gentlemen and ladies, this is a pretty fine tuned understanding that if you are wise and brave enough to develop, you're going to turn into someone that we would all benefit learning from. Best wishes. Back July 1st on this site. Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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