Conditioning from a young age

[Blessed2]

Something is coming up...

 

I was watching a video about how it seems that the far-right gets to young men and boys quite easily... Stuff like Andrew Tate etc. It might be that these people and ideas "talk to" young men and boys better than other sources. They might take in account the way life seems like to young men.

 

So I started thinking back to my childhood, when I was about 9-15 years old. I wondered what used to be important to me? What was the central themes at that time? And... one thing that really comes up is that I used to see constant competition with other boys at that time.

 

Who's 'the shit' and who is a loser. Who's popular. Who's the coolest. Most powerful. Most brave. Who's the daredevil. Who wins the fight. Who has the best jokes. Like a constant competition for the #1 spot. You were on the top, or out. And there was bullying, leaving out from the group, humiliation etc.

 

At some point the competition seemed to be pretty much forgotten, but I don't think it has really been let go. I was never on that #1 spot. I was one of those 'losers' you know. It might have left some marks. Beliefs and thoughts.

 

I still notice the same competition within myself, just in a different way. And of course there is feelings of insecurity, shame, unworthiness.

 

I wonder if other men here have had a similar experience? Do you remember that this sort of competition was around when you were a kid?

 

 

[Phil]

Seems to all start with a collective conditioning, the belief in matter. Then the competition is believed to be seen, and believed to be within some thing, and for that thing there seems to be a plurality of feeling and no guidance.