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Posted

I do not fear any delivery drivers and never have. I wrote this recollection of a my dream last night specifically about a Fedex driver, then went online and saw that a seven year old girl was recently killed by a  Fedex truck driver and it's all over the news. Is this picking up on collective mind, or is it about myself? (Ok, ok, nonduality.) Usually my dreams just seem like annoying scrambled happenings. Is it really worth writing them down, I sometimes wonder? They are so easily and quickly forgotten.This time I didn't get much personal insight, but this weird synchronicity. 

 

This is the gist of what I wrote down in my journal.

 

"I had a dream last night that a Fedex driver around my age stopped and we got talking, I got talking about wim hoff breathing with him and he tried to show me something to do when I’m mad that has to do with a breathing technique. Then he was interested in buying a puppy from my neighbors across the road, then the dream morphed, I felt a connection with him, he came into my home which morphed into not just a house but a landscape and my kids where there and then this deep suspicion of him started and things got worse and more scary. We were walking around this pond trying to evade or hide from him without his knowing, which stopped working at some point.  I got the information later on, or had the idea that I was a "have" and he was a "have not", and this is perhaps what the suspicion and his motivations and turning into someone who matched it came from." 

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Posted

The more they’re written down ime, the less they seem random and also the less they occur. At night at least. A kind of flip flop happens / happened where the messages or premonitions that came in dreams comes instead as a realer than real infinite seeing / dimensionless vision ‘in front of you’. There’s pro’s & con’s experientially. 

Posted

@Phil I finished reiki II class yesterday and we practiced using the mental/emotional symbol and asking questions during the reiki sessions. We both saw dreamlike imagery for the other. While journaling I have often seen connections of random stuff that occurs during the day, almost like interpreting a dream. On one memorable occasion, I drove by a mailbox that had a flag cover and was attracted to it in a very strange way. That week I met the man who lived in the house, and had a very strange, somewhat disturbing and very annoying interaction with him. When I got home and journaled, I realized that it was a whole lot of "stuff" coming to light (dislike and judgement I held for years since childhood) and the symbolism and synchronicity was so incredibly wild and outrageously clear. Every letting go/awakening has been marked with this.  Sometimes they are really powerful, other times subtle or in the middle somewhere. The more this is done, the quicker it is received, or processed, the less we will dream at night, is that what you are saying? 

 

Also is the so quickly changing and recontextualizing nature of dreams a message itself, the message that you create what you give focus to? 

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Posted
6 hours ago, Mandy said:

Usually my dreams just seem like annoying scrambled happenings. Is it really worth writing them down, I sometimes wonder?

In my experience I find much more value in contemplating how I felt when faced with a situation in a dream than focusing on the dream itself. The detail of what was happening in a dream are irrelevant imo, but the way it made you feel, the way it scared you or annoyed you can be used to better understand the self you are creating right now.

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Posted
53 minutes ago, Winter said:

In my experience I find much more value in contemplating how I felt when faced with a situation in a dream than focusing on the dream itself. The detail of what was happening in a dream are irrelevant imo, but the way it made you feel, the way it scared you or annoyed you can be used to better understand the self you are creating right now.

Yeah, I often use that as my guide too and usually only remember something if it felt out of ordinary. I have noticed for a while recently that there are a lot of low level annoying/frustrating dreams though, and have wondered about that lately.

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Posted
15 minutes ago, Mandy said:

Yeah, I often use that as my guide too and usually only remember something if it felt out of ordinary. I have noticed for a while recently that there are a lot of low level annoying/frustrating dreams though, and have wondered about that lately.

What is it about them that makes you call them "low level", frustrating or annoying? What about them annoys you?

4201 is my number

Posted
6 hours ago, Mandy said:

 The more this is done, the quicker it is received, or processed, the less we will dream at night, is that what you are saying? 

Congrats on the Reiki II! That’s so great to hear!

Yeah. The finite dreams stop occurring and any back & fourth or overlooking that This is The Dream fizzles out. It’s been about a decade (?) maybe since a finite dream has been experienced here. Reiki classes seem to have had a lot to do with that. 

6 hours ago, Mandy said:

 

Also is the so quickly changing and recontextualizing nature of dreams a message itself, the message that you create what you give focus to? 

Yes & no. There’s the emptying / reconciliation of all to the contrary of This being The Dream. Then as the finite dream / emptying is experience just as the body mind’s ‘waking up’, there’s an experience of what was reconciled, in a dream like manor. So there’s usually like you said, some beliefs spotted, some insights therein, and also some premonition / synchronicity (infinite mind stuff) etc.  Old “finite mind” on it’s way out… Infinite Mind being unobscurred by the “finite mind” emptying out. Hence the dreamlike imagery. Not per se there is a finite mind, and it’s emptying, more so the “finite mind” is what’s being emptied of. 

Posted
11 hours ago, Winter said:

What is it about them that makes you call them "low level", frustrating or annoying? What about them annoys you?

Hard to tell if it's my annoyance with the dreams or the annoyance as said character IN the dreams. 😶 I'll definitely be listening and writing them down every morning as I can. 

 

Last night I dreamed that my sister was getting married again, she announced it would be in Niagara Falls and as soon as I said, "Awesome, I want to see Niagara Falls!" She said that there were limited spots and I likely wouldn't be able to get one and attend. Upon waking I "remembered" that she was married about a year ago and they did it with her husband's family and we were "invited" but it was really expected that we would all attend via Zoom, (cause pandemic). I guess that annoyed me. Then the dream changed and I was mediating with an enormous crystal for some reason, and feeling kinda weird about this for some reason and she burst in the room. I guess that it was a replaying of the dynamic with her being four years older than me, and always feeling like she was kinda judging and keeping an eye on me. 

 

The other dream was that my husband had bought a second car (it was ugly, expensive and totally useless) that was not as good as the car we bought together, and I was like "we really need to sell that" and had a sense that it needed to be done now before used car prices fall and he was like, "yeah I agree but I'm not gonna do anything to make that happen." And that pretty much sums up my main annoyance with my husband's personality. Master of non action in-deed. 

giphy.gif

But here's the thing... in "real life" we DO actually have 3 cars when we really only want 2, but it's MY car that's the problem, not his. I'm really annoyed with this because my old car started breaking down and it's a chip problem because of the bandaid fix that Ford made on their faulty transmissions. But there are no chips, because of shortages, so we had no choice but to buy a new car. We can't sell the other car, it's just sitting at the garage for months, and likely many more waiting for a chip while used car prices fall. I'm intending to call Ford to get more information as to how this is fair in the least, and why I can't have a rental reimbursement or a really nice offer made on the car, because I got as far as I can with the garage but I'm being complacent. It's not that I need them to do something for me, I just need to know that I've done what I need to do to get an answer and feel heard about it. 

 

More and more lately I've been conscious that if I'm pissed at my husband for something, it's really what I'm not doing that pisses me off. Decided to forget about his weight problems and focus instead on losing the 6-10  pounds I've always really wanted to lose myself, and feel a lot better. 

 

8 hours ago, Phil said:

Congrats on the Reiki II! That’s so great to hear!

It was awesome. I took it from the guy who owns the cabin I stay at, and my time there is what sort of connected us. I asked months ago but it was his first attunement since a heart attack and a Parkinson's diagnosis, and then pandemic and he had dropped the practice for the most part, even though it's been an enormous and transformative part of his life. He was hesitant to teach me at first. I just waited for him to be ready and the timing was perfect. 

8 hours ago, Phil said:

Reiki classes seem to have had a lot to do with that. 

 

Seems on the surface like an indirect way to do things, but in practice is the opposite. I really love the symbols part of it. 

8 hours ago, Phil said:

 

Yes & no. There’s the emptying / reconciliation of all to the contrary of This being The Dream. Then as the finite dream / emptying is experience just as the body mind’s ‘waking up’, there’s an experience of what was reconciled, in a dream like manor. So there’s usually like you said, some beliefs spotted, some insights therein, and also some premonition / synchronicity (infinite mind stuff) etc.  Old “finite mind” on it’s way out… Infinite Mind being unobscurred by the “finite mind” emptying out. Hence the dreamlike imagery. Not per se there is a finite mind, and it’s emptying, more so the “finite mind” is what’s being emptied of. 

Ok, emptying makes a lot more sense, thank you. 

 

So the writing the dream down is reconciling the split between the dream world and the real world, that there seems to be two? I see that I haven't been listening, as much as I have loved and appreciated imagery and symbolism in the past few years, and appreciate a good impactful dream, I dream every night a lot but I've just been annoyed by and ignoring them. 

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Posted
22 minutes ago, Mandy said:

So the writing the dream down is reconciling the split between the dream world and the real world, that there seems to be two?

Awesome!

Yes & no. The reconciliation isn’t doable it’s happening. Like a movie with the sound muted. The movie’s happening wether unmuted or muted, but it’s nice to unmute and hear what’s goin on. 

Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, Mandy said:

Last night I dreamed that my sister was getting married again, she announced it would be in Niagara Falls and as soon as I said, "Awesome, I want to see Niagara Falls!" She said that there were limited spots and I likely wouldn't be able to get one and attend. Upon waking I "remembered" that she was married about a year ago and they did it with her husband's family and we were "invited" but it was really expected that we would all attend via Zoom, (cause pandemic). I guess that annoyed me. Then the dream changed and I was mediating with an enormous crystal for some reason, and feeling kinda weird about this for some reason and she burst in the room. I guess that it was a replaying of the dynamic with her being four years older than me, and always feeling like she was kinda judging and keeping an eye on me.

Essentially you are conceptualizing the in-person presence at your sister's wedding as some sort of exclusive thing only the worthy can go to (in the eyes of your sister) and feel hurt you weren't "truly" invited.

 

Have you ever expressed how that made you feel to your family?

 

It comes across to me as you would really want to be seen as an equal in the eye of your sister, as opposed to being seen like the younger sister. The game of trying to change the perception others have of you is indeed a frustrating, annoying one to play.

 

2 hours ago, Mandy said:

The other dream was that my husband had bought a second car (it was ugly, expensive and totally useless) that was not as good as the car we bought together, and I was like "we really need to sell that" and had a sense that it needed to be done now before used car prices fall and he was like, "yeah I agree but I'm not gonna do anything to make that happen." And that pretty much sums up my main annoyance with my husband's personality. Master of non action in-deed. 

 

But here's the thing... in "real life" we DO actually have 3 cars when we really only want 2, but it's MY car that's the problem, not his. I'm really annoyed with this because my old car started breaking down and it's a chip problem because of the bandaid fix that Ford made on their faulty transmissions. But there are no chips, because of shortages, so we had no choice but to buy a new car. We can't sell the other car, it's just sitting at the garage for months, and likely many more waiting for a chip while used car prices fall. I'm intending to call Ford to get more information as to how this is fair in the least, and why I can't have a rental reimbursement or a really nice offer made on the car, because I got as far as I can with the garage but I'm being complacent. It's not that I need them to do something for me, I just need to know that I've done what I need to do to get an answer and feel heard about it. 

 

More and more lately I've been conscious that if I'm pissed at my husband for something, it's really what I'm not doing that pisses me off. Decided to forget about his weight problems and focus instead on losing the 6-10  pounds I've always really wanted to lose myself, and feel a lot better.

Not much I can say here that you aren't already aware of... But I would say "problems" really stop being problems when you know you have done everything you can about them. Once you've made your call or planned the fix or the sale and you know the plan you made is the best you've got then there is no more reason to think about it anymore and you can go about your day. Only when you hesitate then you worry "maybe if I had done that call or this thing then it would be solved" and then you get pissed at yourself for hesitating and essentially pissed at your husband as well.

Edited by Winter

4201 is my number

Posted
49 minutes ago, Winter said:

Have you ever expressed how that made you feel to your family?

 

No, because I never felt that strongly about it at the time, except annoyance. The pandemic mixed everything up, and I didn't really want to go travel to it anyway. But I guess I'm still thinking about it. 

52 minutes ago, Winter said:

Once you've made your call or planned the fix or the sale and you know the plan you made is the best you've got then there is no more reason to think about it anymore and you can go about your day. Only when you hesitate then you worry "maybe if I had done that call or this thing then it would be solved" and then you get pissed at yourself for hesitating and essentially pissed at your husband as well.

 

Yeah, I'm finding the pattern of being mad at him, but then finding that actually I really want to do something myself quite humorous lately. And maybe annoying. 😆

 

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Posted
On 12/10/2022 at 10:57 AM, Mandy said:

No, because I never felt that strongly about it at the time, except annoyance. The pandemic mixed everything up, and I didn't really want to go travel to it anyway. But I guess I'm still thinking about it.

 

Yeah it might only be relevant to the self conception you have right now, kind of like a piece of the current puzzle even if as itself isn't particularly notable and wasn't the piece of any puzzle back then.

4201 is my number

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