Omelette Posted October 11, 2022 Share Posted October 11, 2022 I feel like I lost the spark in relationships... I have little motivation to form or maintain any relationships. I still enjoy communication and socializing. It's just that these relationships are primarily built on proximity... I can have great conversations daily with someone if we just so happen to see each other for whatever reason. Someone : "You want to come out to ___ tonight?" My thoughts are: "I will most likely have more fun at home" (In many cases this is true, I like alone time) "This person doesn't really care about me at all" (I think this is true as well, of course there is a difference between an acquaintance and a friend you have known for decades. But I find myself mentally accusing both of them of not caring about me) "If I speak to some women there, they won't like me anyways, it will be a waste of time" (I think this is partially true, but I haven't had any intimacy or relationship in so long that I think there is no point in trying/ I think "trying" will repel it anyways/ I've been fine without it for so long, so it doesn't matter, I will just never date again) I feel awkward coming up with excuses to avoid events so much... I would say the three thoughts above are the strongest forces in determining this. I think I will have a bad time talking to women, so I will just avoid mixed-gender events a lot of the time. I am almost giving up on having any relationships or sex. Sometimes I wish I was gay because I think it's so much easier for me to understand men versus women... of course it's not a choice, so I try to just repress my attraction to women instead because it feels fruitless. I still avoid the single gender events because of the first two thoughts, that these people aren't even my friends, and I won't have fun. I feel like apart from familial bond, there is no incentive to form any relationships. I still do simply for ease of life, it makes it easier to get what I want with a network of connections. Why am I posting this, what is the issue if I just don't want to interact? - FEAR OF MISSING OUT I fear that as I get older there will be less and less opportunities if I do want to go out and be social. I am turning down stuff every week and questioning if that is the right choice. -FEAR OF FALLING BEHIND I fear that my social skills are declining, I will never find a partner that I think is worth spending my life with, and I won't even find someone for a casual and fun relationship. How can I get excited for socializing and putting myself out there? Why is there so much resistance to this? Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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