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How I Feel...


Eternal

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Another day that I am laying in bed wasting my time doing nothing at all. Not even knowing how to express myself on this journal, everything seems so forced. I feel a sense of emptiness. I am way to much in my head to the point where I don't even know what to say. I experience unhappiness on a daily basis a majority of the time. 

 

"I say tomorrow is going to be different" but that never happens, every day repeats itself. Like it is groundhog day, over & over again with this damaged ego identity. It feels like I am just wasting my existence doing nothing with my life. I tell myself, I need to introduce productive habits but it never happens. I think negatively a lot with a victim mentality. I know what need to be done but nothing every seems to get done. I seem to enjoy being complacent & lazy to the point where I don't even really know what I enjoy in life. I don't even know what to do for a career. It gets to me mentally & emotionally being under my family still with a bad financial life. I should of grown up by now.... 

 

Why do all these negative thoughts constantly come up to my surface, anyway I am going to switch off now as I don't want to journal when I feel like I cannot even express myself properly

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I have a bit more time to post now. Sorry that you aren't feeling well. It's hard to say without knowing you if this is something you can pull yourself out of by setting some goals and motivating yourself or if it's much more serious and you require therapy. 

 

What do you think?

You're a thought. Do you think a thought is going to occupy 'no thought'.

The 'changeless' can be realized only when the 
ever-changing thought-flow stops.

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12 hours ago, Faith said:

I have a bit more time to post now. Sorry that you aren't feeling well. It's hard to say without knowing you if this is something you can pull yourself out of by setting some goals and motivating yourself or if it's much more serious and you require therapy. 

 

What do you think?

I think I require therapy as it’s been ongoing for a while, trying counselling next week. 
 

I just don’t seem to get any kind of satisfaction out of living. Maybe I need to get back on SSRIS, I really don’t want to though. 
 

But I feel like I am just wasting my life

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1 hour ago, Eternal said:

I think I require therapy as it’s been ongoing for a while, trying counselling next week. 

 

Ok, yes, sounds like that would be a good idea and I'm glad to hear you have something set up. I had suffered severe depression before in my life on/off and many times saw therapists. 

 

I like your username. Maybe use it to remember you are bigger then "this life". 😉 

You're a thought. Do you think a thought is going to occupy 'no thought'.

The 'changeless' can be realized only when the 
ever-changing thought-flow stops.

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