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This is a post to just vent what it feels like to have deep childhood trauma. 

 

It feels like a fundamental sense of being dirty or shameful in the nervous system. Like when I hang out with friends/family, there's a fundamental sense of something is wrong with me. 

 

Like I am unclean and everyone else in my vicinity is clean. 

 

I am starting counseling for this and by no means am taking the victim route at all. In fact it's beautiful and exciting to see what will unfold. 

 

That inner child will be cared for and nurtured!

"Too many steps have been taken returning to the root and the source. Better to have been blind and deaf from the beginning! Dwelling in one's true abode, unconcerned with and without - The river flows tranquilly on and the flowers are red."

9th Ox Herding Picture

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