Orb Posted September 2 Author Share Posted September 2 This months off to a slow start, but as it is with sales. At any moment I can get a call for a high line item and make big bucks. Im feeling more of my Self. I am feeling the nature of the spheres. Recognizing I am not either of them fundamentally. My nature is a mystery. All the bills will be covered this month, and for that I experience significant relief. Theres no distinction with sitting on the cushion and operating in daily living. Mindfulness is always the case. When thoughts arise they are allowed to arise and pass. As is the case with the "external" world, all is silence appearing as aliveness, and the same mindfulness applies. Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orb Posted September 2 Author Share Posted September 2 I have not exercised consistently, I like that empty stomach feeling and I know that if I work out early in the morning I will have to eat. But I do feel better when I exercise in the morning. I let go of kratom for a few days and then went back to using it. My meds are very helpful though. I experience an anxiety response around certain people, particularly people that I hold high regard for. As I feel into my nature more those will fade away. Interestingly enough, it's been a very long time since Ive experienced doubt regarding my nature. For many years there was always this sense of inauthenticity or "what if this isn't it?", it occurred to me yesterday that I have no longer experienced that for a long time. I realized that theres never really an enlightenment moment as previously believed for a long time. Only more clarification. But perhaps there may a significant relief from beliefs held that fade away. Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orb Posted September 2 Author Share Posted September 2 Can't wait for that paycheck! It's fucking crazy lol I'll be able to pay rent and my car and still have a ton left. I'm gonna save 80 percent of it. Things I'll do with the 20 percent: - get a new gym membership - buy a bunch of GOL powder - buy healthy satiating vegan foods Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orb Posted September 3 Author Share Posted September 3 Just checked my compensation report and im excited. This month I haven't had any sales YET, its only the 3rd of the month but its time to get this month off to a great start! Im moving out in exactly a week and can't wait for it. It's gonna be great to have my own space and get my own groceries and stuff. My diet will be simplified. I want to live well below my means and save up as much as possible. Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orb Posted September 3 Author Share Posted September 3 Im so FUCKING EXCITED AHHHH. Stuff im gonna do when I get paid: - Im gonna start the 90% loophole shake and have at least 1 big vegan meal & take creatine daily! - Im gonna get a better gym subscription and start working out! - Im gonna buy nicer clothes that are still affordable, my co-workers fuck with me because I show up to the store with beaten up shoes with broken shoelaces, faded pants with lint all over them, and I still made 3 times what those mofos made! Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orb Posted September 3 Author Share Posted September 3 Im gonna eventually buy a bike rack for my car and purchase a superior bicycle. Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orb Posted September 3 Author Share Posted September 3 Im gonna buy a Ninja portable blender, 3 tubs of GOL Meal replacement powder, Matcha, and bananas and almond butter. Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orb Posted September 3 Author Share Posted September 3 And im gonna start going to the gym with my change of clothes and showering/changing there. I hope the waters as cold as possible. And im gonna buy a lock too! Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orb Posted September 5 Author Share Posted September 5 Can't wait to buy that fucking blender! Those matcha infused loop hole shakes are gonna be nice 😎 Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orb Posted Tuesday at 08:29 PM Author Share Posted Tuesday at 08:29 PM GOD I FEEL SO FUCKING HORRIBLE! I'm so angry, I feel so alone, so lonely. I feel so afraid. I can't be myself, I don't know how I'm supposed to express myself. I feel like a fake persona. I don't know who I am supposed to be!!!! Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orb Posted Tuesday at 08:32 PM Author Share Posted Tuesday at 08:32 PM I got blocked by a girl again. Trying so hard not to give up. Today's the day I'm moving out, I moved 99 percent of my shit inside my car, all that's left is my mattress. I feel so horrible fuck this stupid vegan diet. My veins in my head are aching and all I've been having today are loophole shakes. What the hell 😢😢 Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orb Posted Tuesday at 09:27 PM Author Share Posted Tuesday at 09:27 PM Deep down everything's gonna be okay. Quote Mention "Mediocrity is gone. Mind is clear of limitation. I seek no state of enlightenment. Neither do I remain where no enlightenment exists. Since I linger in neither condition, eyes cannot see me. If hundreds of birds strew my path with flowers, such praise would be meaningless." - A Comment on the 8th Ox Herding Picture Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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