Mike's Journal

[Mike]

So, I just need a place to write random stuff at the end of the day - for a better sleep - might as well do it here. 

[Mike]

I'm in an odd place.

Where I see through everything going in circles, being free to choose any action I want, I face a realisation that I have all the time in the World.

Which is really freeing. 

And at the same time, it's impossible to stop it - I simply see it pass away with every second. 

I set goals I'm passionate about, but at the same time, I know they don't matter. And there's nothing wrong with it. It's nice to be a part of a lovely community and share my life with them. But I'll never be able to see life from their perspective anymore. I no longer see anyone as separate from myself and it makes it even weirder in a way. At the same time I don't feel like it's possible for me to abandon this way of living - besides - there's nothing else I'd rather do anyway. It's just really difficult not to laugh sometimes.

Achieving every challenge I set for myself, still at a young age, I suddenly reach a point when I made a full circle right to myself. Instead of chasing everything around me - all there was to do was sit down and turn in the opposite direction.

And happiness is such a natural state of being - how come I tend to forget that? 

Oh well. Sleep tight.