Devin Posted September 21, 2022 Share Posted September 21, 2022 (edited) A persistent thought I've been noticing I often seem to have is that I think people will harm me, not physically but in some way, say in business, or even by the justice system even, betraying me out of ignorance. I really haven't ever been seriously harmed in these types of ways, but I was often betrayed by my parents growing up, being manipulated, and lied to, and I've always seen injustice, dishonesty and corruption. I have good personal relationships and I don't hide from society, I dive in more than most; but I want to dissect this, I thinks it's holding me back from living even more. I often get disgusted by society and need reprieve from it all, I get so disheartened and sad about it, then I judge myself about that, asking if there's something wrong with me, feeling like a might let someone down, knowing my parents want me to do something and I'm not, I'm still letting my parents manipulate me apparently. I know I can be harmed by anyone in all sorts of ways, and that I may get harmed, but when I think about it I know I'm not likely to and I know it's worth the risk. But this thought still seems to hang around, I don't know why. In a way this reinforces something healthy I have which is a disconnect from society, it's sometimes unhealthy though because it can somewhat control me or makes me lose some control over myself I think internal family systems therapy may help with this Edited September 21, 2022 by Devin Quote Mention Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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