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Has anyone cured their own anxiety?


DMT Elf
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If so, could you share how you did it and maybe some useful insights?

Lately I’ve been feeling like it’s controlling my life and I want escape.

It runs in my family. I don’t know if there’s a genetic component, or if it’s parent-child conditioning or what, but I’m tired of it.

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Meditation, exercise, cutting out caffeine, time in nature. Using lemon balm and ashwagandha if desired, doctor approved, etc. Taking deep breaths, doing breathing techniques if desired, connecting with the breath and actually remembering to breathe when feeling tension. Writing down and acknowledging what you want. Expression, whether this is creative as in making youtube videos, blogging/writing, or selling or putting your art out there, or the letting out kind of expression, like talking to a therapist, or expressive journaling, etc. Notice that when you are engaged and happy to have a conversation, anxiety is not present. The feeling of anxiety is an indicator that your thoughts aren't focused on what you want. A nervous speaker is focusing on not making a fool of himself. A confident speaker is passionate about what he is saying. The realization that there are no confident people, just alignment or feeling the guidance that we aren't aligned, is a healing one. We may watch someone do something they love and deem them confident, feel like we lack that, and forget that that's just one moment and they might be scared shitless of spiders. Because there are no confident people it's also impossible not to be one of them, ie there really are no anxious people either. 

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On 6/28/2022 at 11:31 PM, DMT Elf said:

Has anyone cured their own anxiety?

Anxiety is permanently rid, by knowing what it is, via the willingness to question, inspect & feel. 

It’s not a curing of something, it’s a noticing how you’re creating that experience and thus no longer doing so. 

 

A dog is a thing, so to speak. If you want to be without a dog, don’t buy one. If you already have a dog and want to be without it, you can give it to someone. 

Anxiety is different. Anxiety is not a thing, as in an object, and therefore anxiety is not mine, yours, or theirs.  That would be a belief.

(Not that dog is other than a thought as well). 

On 6/28/2022 at 11:31 PM, DMT Elf said:

If so, could you share how you did it and maybe some useful insights?

Lately I’ve been feeling like it’s controlling my life and I want escape.

“It’s controlling my life and I want to escape” is not feeling, it’s a belief about feeling. 

Aversion.

The Ten Ox Herder Pics.

 

The suffering (‘anxiety’) is the aversion. 

On 6/28/2022 at 11:31 PM, DMT Elf said:

It runs in my family. I don’t know if there’s a genetic component, or if it’s parent-child conditioning or what, but I’m tired of it.

Those are all beliefs. Those beliefs are what feels like trapped and thus escaping comes to mind. 

 

What categorically, subject wise, is the discord felt with? 

The end of the anxiety is in finding and ‘cleaning up’ the discord in the interpretation / belief. 

It is entirely possible to bring an end to, and be without anxiety. 

 

Aside, but related, look for a true desire, a want for alignment… incongruent with a habit which might have been adopted as a coping mechanism, but which has now run it’s course / is seen to no longer be serving you. Bring thoughts to mind about letting that go for a few days or so, before the change. 

 

And of course all the usual suspects… meditation first thing every morning, expression journal daily, drinks lots of water, cut excess sugar and caffeine & other stimulants. 

 

The Loophole Shake.

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for me caffeine was the alleviation to bouts of anxiety. Since I recently allowed caffeine be absent, I barely noticed the withdrawal symptoms because of replacing it with a healthier option for tea. Water is also a brain and emotion detox, can be flavored too with a slice of lemon or fruits etc.

Just want to add my 2cents here, to put in a 1% effort in something can make a difference ^^

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Thanks everyone.

 

It's interesting how everybody replying to this thread mentioned caffeine. I drink coffee most days but not every day. Maybe I'll try switching to caffeinated tea as an alternative. I've done this before, but I prefer coffee since it's so much stronger. (I guess that's the problem)

 

@Phil

Cool, I think I know what you mean here. Comes back to all the stuff you talk about. Alignment, recognizing discord, etc.. 

 

For me, the discord mostly comes down to thoughts about myself relative to where I am in life. Thoughts about how I'm not the person I wish I was, and I don't have the life I wish I had. Like not having good enough friends, not having a girlfriend, not having the job opportunities I want, not knowing if I got the right collage degree, not being healthy and fit enough, but also lacking the discipline to exercise and eat well.

I can see how anxiety might be a biproduct of all of that.

I think having more direction in life would improve the way I feel a lot. When I say I don't have the life I want, that's true, but I'm not sure I know what the life I do want even looks like. It's a tough spot to be in.

I try to envision what it would look like if I had all the stuff I wanted, and then I look inward to see what would need to change about myself in order to get that. It's emotionally heavy work, really. Self reflection and all that.. It's hard. I've worked with the emotional scale like you suggested, and I can see that I have a lot of suppressed feelings. A lot of anger. I got a dreamboard too. Wrote good shit on it.. Literally "good shit" 😁

Is the process supposed to feel heavy and draining or is it supposed to feel light, freeing, and relieving  in your view? Like, if I feel really drained by spiritual work, am I maybe doing something wrong? 

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4 hours ago, DMT Elf said:

Wrote good shit on it.. Literally "good shit" 😁

😂

 

If you are feeling vague about what you want, take advantage of it, daydream. Think about any image of what inspires you even if it makes no sense whatsoever, recall stuff you read in books or movies that stuck with you. Think like the Author of a book, not the character in the book. Only the character thinks "I need to change myself before I can have that". But the character doesn't even think. It can't even do that much. The only potential for change the character has is born out of the author's free inspiration, uninhibited imagination. "Good shit", utterly inspired. ❤️

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6 hours ago, DMT Elf said:

Literally "good shit" 😁

😂 awesome.

6 hours ago, DMT Elf said:

Is the process supposed to feel heavy and draining or is it supposed to feel light, freeing, and relieving  in your view?

100% light, freeing and relieving. The evidence is the alignment felt when reading / focusing on those very words.

 

Our true nature is quite literally being light, is always absolutely free, and is relief as it is ever-loving without condition & without any exception whatsoever. Even more so, there really isn’t a ‘process’ per se, there is aligning thoughts with what is real, the truth, or true nature, feeling, and the profound joy of the experience, discoveries, and consciously creating which spontaneously arises. This is ongoing, not a solution or a fix.  What’s discovered is the source of all healing and relief desired, is already within you, is the creator of all things, and of all sensations & emotions. The source has simply & most innocently been ‘covered up’, or, seemingly obscured. Most relevantly, it hasn’t been covered up - it continues to be covered up - and that is what will change, and that is what makes all the difference. 

 

6 hours ago, DMT Elf said:

Like, if I feel really drained by spiritual work, am I maybe doing something wrong? 

You are certainly not doing anything wrong, no. The root of the discordant momentum is a misguided ideology of ‘self-help-spirituality’ which unfortunately centers around a ‘separate self’, and thus is confusing, isolating and leads to trying to make sense of the growing intensity of discord with collective labels like anxiety. 

 

The discord arises from that you are perfect as you are and are doing everything right, and can not get it wrong... and yet have created a momentum of focusing on & giving attention to thoughts to the contrary. The discord persists only by this being ‘kept in the shadow’, just out of sight, categorically, by conceptualizing. This goes unnoticed only in an atmosphere or environment in which this is the norm.

 

6 hours ago, DMT Elf said:

For me, the discord mostly comes down to thoughts about myself relative to where I am in life. Thoughts about how I'm not the person I wish I was, and I don't have the life I wish I had. Like not having good enough friends, not having a girlfriend, not having the job opportunities I want, not knowing if I got the right collage degree, not being healthy and fit enough, but also lacking the discipline to exercise and eat well.

I can see how anxiety might be a biproduct of all of that.

What is felt as heavy & draining, is the discord of comparative thoughts. More specifically, the believing of comparative thoughts, and the not noticing these thoughts aren’t actually true or grounded in direct experience, but are (were) nonetheless being believed. The dots weren’t connecting, as to the discordant feeling, and the untruth of the comparative thoughts.  As this is noticed, this resonates & makes great sense, alignment is felt, and heavy-ness is dispelled with lightness. As the ‘draining’ is realized more & more to be the discord of focusing on & believing discordant comparative thoughts, more & more clarity, alignment and inspiration naturally arises. Very much like helium or steam. That’s the true nature’s thing, that’s what it does, it’s natural. 

 

Spiritually, the Good News is ‘the work’ is not an effort or a doing, but is an effortless inspecting & willingness to see with clarity, to ‘see reality as it is’, to accept the truth of yourself as you are, and to fully embrace & love every aspect of the person you are being. This is alignment. 

 

With fitness, just take he first step, which is willfully letting go of the belief you are not healthy or fit enough. Then take the second step. Than might be on concrete, grass, a treadmill or elliptical, doesn’t matter. Just take it. Even if that second step is literally a single foot step, take it. Then tomorrow, two steps. Taking the step changes the orientation, and that is everything, and that is the feeling,the alignment, that is what is really desired. You will be amazed what it leads to, but - first & foremost, enjoy the journey. 

 

6 hours ago, DMT Elf said:

For me, the discord mostly comes down to thoughts about myself relative to where I am in life. Thoughts about how I'm not the person I wish I was, and I don't have the life I wish I had. Like not having good enough friends, not having a girlfriend, not having the job opportunities I want, not knowing if I got the right collage degree, not being healthy and fit enough, but also lacking the discipline to exercise and eat well.

I can see how anxiety might be a biproduct of all of that.

“For me” is a habit of thought. It is like inserting a place holder of a ‘separate self’, but in accordance with direct experience, ‘for me’ is a thought, and is not, a ‘me’. The real Me is awareness of the thought, “for me”. 

 

“Thoughts about myself relative to where I am in life” is only a discordant comparative thought. There isn’t that “myself”, in direct experience there is that thought, about a myself.  You are right here right now. The “other life” which is used to derive the comparison, does not exist, and is only a thought about. It is the comparison which feels discordant because there is no truth to the comparison. It is only beliving the thought, and that is the discord which is felt. 

 

Put another way, the condition held, is that this myself and this life doesn’t quite measure up to the other myself and the other life. What’s felt is the unconditional truth / true nature… loving this person, this life, right now. The believing of the thought, is the obscuring of this love, that you are.

 

If you were not being the person you wish you were - you would not be being the person that you are being. 

You are being this person. This person is beautiful, this person is perfection incarnate, this person is strong, capable, talented, gifted, this person is literally an inexplicable miracle and is right now being loved into existence and adored beyond all measures and thoughts of comparison, by a source that this person is, which is beyond & prior to all thought. 

 

“The life I wish I had”, is not the life you do have. This is not a problem, the discord is just simply traced to it’s proper root, a comparative thought, with a life that is a thought. When the comparative thought is no longer believed, the relief is already underway and felt as such. This is alignment. This is certainly not a problem, because ‘behind you’ if you will, just prior to this experience of seeing, of hearing, of sensation, of all the tastes, of the romance, of the friendships, of every delightful thing & experience there is, which is for you - is infinity. A love which creates all that is. A love which desires to ease your mind and fill you with goodness, energy, and the clarity of knowing what you are wanting, and the clarity of the orientation to it, and the joy of the journey of it all. This love is so unconditional, that a condition about it, a comparative or conditional thought held, focused upon - veils. Can you even imagine the nature of a being so powerful, and yet so loving, so freedom giving - that a simple discordant thought is enough that it essentially yields in it’s purity of allowing? Of course you can not imagine this love, because you are this love. 

 

You are perfect, complete & whole, thus, the outer is reflective of the inner. ‘It’s’ all One. There is no separation. Thus, ‘you are attracting’. 

Allow the alignment, and you allow the friends, girlfriend, and opportunities to come into your experience. 

Allow the alignment and I guarantee you the momentum will be such that you will forget what anxiety was. 

You will try to bring it to mind, to relate, to feel it & remember, and you literally won’t be able to. 

 

Lack, and a right or wrong degree, and that you are unhealthy - this is all judgement, it is believing thoughts and the discord is felt in kind. You can not actually be conditional, but you can focus on & believe thoughts as conditions which are not in alignment, not indicative of your being. It is your being, the infinite one which these conditional thoughts are in discord with,  which be’s that which you desire. If anxiety is anything, it is your being saying allow the alignment, allow me to be it - that was the plan ‘my man’. 

 

The substance, the fabric, reality, is love, abundance. 

Thoughts are for preference. 

Not believing. 

You are thee creator. 

You are vibrationally being This. 

 

6 hours ago, DMT Elf said:

I think having more direction in life would improve the way I feel a lot. When I say I don't have the life I want, that's true, but I'm not sure I know what the life I do want even looks like. It's a tough spot to be in.

One of the insights of using the scale is that you just can’t get from ‘there’ to ‘there’. You can’t believe you don’t want, love, adore the life you have… and skip to allowing your desires to manifest. Discordant thoughts are let go on the way up the scale. This is allowing. Getting out of your own way. 

6 hours ago, DMT Elf said:

I try to envision what it would look like if I had all the stuff I wanted, and then I look inward to see what would need to change about myself in order to get that. It's emotionally heavy work, really. Self reflection and all that.. It's hard. I've worked with the emotional scale like you suggested, and I can see that I have a lot of suppressed feelings. A lot of anger.

It’s not ‘heavy work’, it’s a discordant ideology. It’s not ‘hard’, it’s impossible. A Self which never changes and appears as all change can never be changed. Trying to change yourself in order to receive something is precisely backwards.

How can you love yourself? Count the ways. For real. Get some paper and make a list. This is also alignment. So simple, so effortless, yet most powerful. 

 

There isn’t a separate self, a ‘you’ which has feelings, nor which has suppressed feelings, nor which has anger. Anger is an emotion, and any one focused on and or believing certain thoughts experiences the emotion, anger. Momentum untangles, unwinds, via continued expression, and it can take time. Orientation changes, and alignment is felt the instant the orientation changes. Alignment is felt simply in the acknowledgement of the willingness, to allow. 

6 hours ago, DMT Elf said:

I got a dreamboard too. Wrote good shit on it.. Literally "good shit" 😁

Of course you did. You’re super-intelligent. 👊🏻

 

 

 

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Yes, it is about 90% lessened from what it was. The short answer is meditation as the witness while feeling uneasy, and lots of self love and questioning of thought loops. Now I usually notice when an anxiety causing thought loop is going on, and I just simply drop the thought story when I notice it. Thoughts are not at all important, especially thoughts that come uninvited. So developing that mindset (that most thoughts are simply useless) along with mindfulness and self love practice has been practically the most powerful for me. 

 

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Posted (edited)
On 7/5/2022 at 11:07 PM, Phil said:

@DreaMT

Sounds great. With respect to the framing of ‘anxiety causing thought loops’, change the interpretation from discordant to aligned by applying perspectives rooted in appreciation, or as you said, self-love, directly to the thought / story / topic. 

Yeah you're right I know I know.. I recently realized all those thought stories and attachments of the ego are just desperate calls for Love and of Love. To Love something is to want it to continue being and to enhace its being. But the most total Love is the Love that loves the totality, all that is. So in a sense the egos Love is just misdirected, it is based on a belief that there is something that must be preserved and protected. I sense that the ego is like a loving but overprotective mother, who just loves so much it would not want to let go and wants to keep holding on to that seemingly finite expression.

 

The Love of God goes so deep, that through total commitment to an aspect of itself it can even seem to forget everything else and is able to create a seeming separation which seems to veil the Love. But through loving even that which seems to veil the Love, loving the separation the Love just expands more and more. It is Love all the way! I see now that this is what ACIM would call forgiveness, to see the Love in the seemingly Loveless or unlovable. To see everything with the eyes of absolute Love. 

Edited by DreaMT
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Posted (edited)

@Phil

I’m kinda tripping out about this, man.

 

If I’m understanding you right, I think that would literally mean that the actual problem in my life (which isn’t even really a problem) stems from my totally wrong assumption that there must be something wrong with me. So, I search for something wrong with myself just so I can have something to fix. What I don’t realize is that there was never anything wrong with me and I made it all up just to confirm the belief that there was ever something wrong with me to begin with… Comparative thought being the idea of some other way I should be. Something not right about the way I am now. It seems like it's the same thing.

 

First of all, if I’m actually doing that, that’s really screwed up on its own, but also when I think deeply about some of the other stuff you talk about, and what’s talked about in other spiritual circles, it seems really convoluted and far out to me.

 

Stuff like,

- I’m literally daydreaming all the time.

- I mistake my daydreams for reality by projecting my daydream fantasyland onto reality.

- Without the daydream, there is only boundless, infinite LOVE (of all things).

- The daydream itself is also perfect love and goodness.

- “Me and my daydreaming” is more daydreaming.

- The real me is what appears as the thought about me and the daydreaming.

- I can’t form any concept of this “real me” because of the self-reference problem.

- My true self is such perfect love and goodness that I may as well be divinity itself.

- We’re all really ONE existing together in some infinite, homogeneous, unified, singularity that’s simultaneously pure existential nothing.

- It’s actually impossible for me to do anything wrong at all or be imperfect in any way.

- Any (literally any) thought I have that feels bad isn’t true and only ONLY ONLY feels bad not because it’s true but because of how far away it is from what’s true (perfect goodness).

 

As I’m actually writing all this out and thinking about it, I’m laughing from the sheer absurdity of it all (seemingly). I swear I couldn’t make any of that up. I really wish I had specific questions to ask you, but honestly, I haven’t even got the faintest clue where to start… This stuff seems totally whack to me, man. 

 

If all of this is actually true stuff that you’ve realized directly, how long did it take for it to become intuitive? You must have been pretty mind-fucked for a while, right? If all of this is actually true, the implications are astonishing!

 

Is there really nothing other than discordant belief stopping me from having everything I ever wanted (since apparently, I already do have everything I ever wanted)? Is there even a limit to what life can be like in terms of awesomeness? How good it can get? Is it actually the case that all I have to do is stop believing thoughts that feel bad? Like if right now I just stopped believing anything that feels misaligned, nothing bad would happen, and everything I ever wanted in life would become real? And in order to accomplish this, I don’t even have to do anything? It’s possible I’m just being dense, but it sounds like that’s what you’re saying.

 

I guess I never really tried to look at it face value like this before. I think a part of me always assumed the talk of love and stuff was just a way for gurus to sell themselves... Marketing essentially.

Edited by DMT Elf
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On 7/7/2022 at 12:55 AM, DreaMT said:

all those thought stories and attachments of the ego are just desperate calls for Love and of Love.

 

@Phil  Would you say that what DreaMT is saying here is accurate? Like are all thought stories really just my ego calling out and saying "please love me"? 

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On 7/9/2022 at 11:04 PM, DMT Elf said:

all those thought stories and attachments of the ego are just desperate calls for Love and of Love.

In hindsight I do want to share something. I don’t think the anxiety actually has anything to do with thought stories, attachments, ego, or neuroticism at all. Let’s slim what you said there (above) down to this… 

On 7/9/2022 at 11:04 PM, DMT Elf said:

… Love and Love.

I think what’s going on is aversion… a tiny, nuanced, very very subtle thing is being missed, and when you recognize what’s meant by aversion… that will be the key, the difference you’re looking for. By aversion, I mean if & when the anxiety arises, there is an inclination to get away or as you said escape from it, to not feel it anymore, to be without it, to cure it, to resolve it.

 

If & when it arises I would try thinking, in a gentle, calm manor -  ‘this is what I’m feeling…it’s not good, or bad, or about anything else, it very simply and very plainly is what is currently felt. It’s a very nuanced thing I’m trying to communicate here. I don’t really mean ‘embrace it’, or ‘want it’, or ‘allow it’, or ‘being ok with it’, but just saying - that it is. 

 

Like if there was a blue car and you do not prefer the car be blue, and you were really wanting it to be red… since the car is blue… anything other than just - ‘the car is blue’ - is aversion from ‘what is’.  

 

You may or may not be aware Love is ‘What Is’ - but that kind of doesn’t matter really, because regardless - you are feeling what you are feeling. 

 

So if & when anxiety arises, just relax, breathe slowly, and say to yourself - ‘this is what I’m feeling’ a few times. 

 

‘This is what I’m feeling’… ‘this is what I’m feeling’… ‘this is what I’m feeling’. 

 

While you say that, keep in touch with feeling, and see what happens. 

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@Phil

OK, great. After that last explanation, it seems like I’m getting some better headway.

 

Is the key to the subtle nuance you’re talking about the continued emphasis on the word is? Good and bad, right and wrong etc.. are all conditions, but feeling isn’t conditional. Feeling just is.

 

So, the nuance would be to just recognize what is free from the conditions of thought. Doing so, leads to clarity, and clarity will naturally reduce anxiety.

 

Does it seem like I’m getting that right?

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41 minutes ago, DMT Elf said:

Does it seem like I’m getting that right?

Yes very much. BUT - even less… so minus adding in the ‘step’ about clarity. I’m not saying clarity will lead to reducing anxiety. I’m saying when there is the feeling of anxiety, bring the thought to mind ‘this is what I’m feeling’… and feel wether the anxiety increases or recedes… just from relaxing the body and bringing that thought to mind about it. I think it will be direct and immediate. 

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