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the transience of emotion


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So, about "conscious creation"...

The idea of "living the dream" is really pointing to living now joyfully, usually believed to be in some future. And so in living this desired life, it has always been associated with that feeling of "I'm on top of the world", "I'm really LOVING this experience", "this is amazing" - Enthusiasm, Passion, Love.

 

So I've concluded that if I want to live the dream I should focus more on the feeling of the experience rather than on trying to change the experience to what I believe will bring good feeling.

 

So now something I've came to realize is that emotions are very transient.

There doesn't seem to be a staying for a long time at Enthusiasm, before it cools down to like Contentment, or maybe even Boredom and Frustration.

And the thing is that projection also plays here - when feeling Angry, all thoughts are of anger nature; when feeling boredom, all thoughts are of boredom nature; when feeling contentment, all thoughts are pretty peaceful of contentment nature. But now I've had many many times that I'm vibing very deeply to some crazy music that I'm on love with, and then as soon as attention shifts to "my messy room" or "my lifestyle" - the emotion ain't staying no positive no more.

 

Being in that great emotion of Enthusiasm doesn't make me immune to experience the thought (and it's feeling) of my messy room and shitty lifestyle. Emotions switch real quick. So I basically can't really experience the "life of my dream" when the only time I experience it is when listening to music. But then when I get off it, there's none of that inspiration to do something like clean my room or plan for a better future.

 

 

Also, as a side note, I went today to experience perhaps the scariest psychological horror movie I've ever experienced in the cinema - got me screaming out loud almost every jumpscare, breath heavily, cursing those damn creators of the movie (hated for real), almost shed a tear on the right eye, and really prayed for that movie to end already at some point. Not a single moment of rest. Really a psychological suffer, and high on adrenaline even hours after the movie has finished.

And so I wondered, why did I want to experience this intense fear? I could've decided to watch something lighter like a comedy movie, or to just simply stay at home listening to great music.

But why did I willingly choose to experience fear?

Why choose fear over love?

The need to relax and relieve after this movie is real...

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Emotion is how thoughts, beliefs & interpretations presently feel. Though thoughts can imply there is, there is no middle man or sep self in time. 

 

11 hours ago, fopylo said:

But why did I willingly choose to experience fear?

Scrutinize that assumption / claim in comparison to direct experience presently; thought, perception and or sensation?

Emotion, fear, is how thoughts, beliefs & interpretations feel, not a thing a separate thing (chooser) chooses. 

 

11 hours ago, fopylo said:

Why choose fear over love?

“Chooser”; thought, perception and or sensation?

 

11 hours ago, fopylo said:

The need to relax and relieve after this movie is real...

EMotion is how thoughts, beliefs & interpretations feel. 

“Needer”; thought, perception and or sensation?

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@Phil

12 hours ago, Phil said:

Emotion is how thoughts, beliefs & interpretations presently feel.

Right.

 

Sorry, I just realized I didn't leave any questions here. What I meant to ask is how can I consciously create when emotions like Enthusiasm doesn't really "leave a trail behind" to transition it to good feeling thoughts even when for a split second I look at the room? Feeling good is momentary until something in the environment changes.

12 hours ago, Phil said:

Scrutinize that assumption / claim in comparison to direct experience presently; thought, perception and or sensation?

Emotion, fear, is how thoughts, beliefs & interpretations feel, not a thing a separate thing (chooser) chooses. 

Right. When the thought of watching a horror movie came up it felt good, but then on the experience of watching the movie there were too many things that emitted the vibration of fear. Scary on my life. Fear was greatly felt, and I didn't like it all the time.

 

12 hours ago, Phil said:

EMotion is how thoughts, beliefs & interpretations feel. 

“Needer”; thought, perception and or sensation?

Oh come on man... This was just an expression (little humor)

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22 minutes ago, fopylo said:

Sorry, I just realized I didn't leave any questions here. What I meant to ask is how can I consciously create when emotions like Enthusiasm doesn't really "leave a trail behind" to transition it to good feeling thoughts even when for a split second I look at the room? Feeling good is momentary until something in the environment changes.

What are the thoughts about the room, by which lower than enthusiasm is felt? Bring em into the light. 

 

24 minutes ago, fopylo said:

Right. When the thought of watching a horror movie came up it felt good, but then on the experience of watching the movie there were too many things that emitted the vibration of fear. Scary on my life. Fear was greatly felt, and I didn't like it all the time.

Fear is an emotion - how thoughts, beliefs & interpretations feel. There aren’t “things emitting the vibration of fear”. The experience isn’t coincidental. It’s likely you want to realize it’s just a movie. If it wasn’t scary it wouldn’t be a horror film. The scarier it is the better. It’s fun because it’s just a movie. 

 

28 minutes ago, fopylo said:

Oh come on man... This was just an expression (little humor)

😝 Sorry. 

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@Phil

1 hour ago, Phil said:

What are the thoughts about the room, by which lower than enthusiasm is felt? Bring em into the light. 

"This room is a mess", "Unliveable place", "I'm an unorganized person", "I'm too lazy to tidy it, too much of a hassel now...".

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@fopylo

Mystery solved right? 

 

It’s not perception (“when I look at the room”) nor “until some thing in the environment changes”. 

It’s the sep self of thoughts - knowing and judgment. The “one who knows” This is not perfection. The “one who is separate and can judge This”.

Of course it feels off and makes it seem like goodness, perfection is momentary - but it’s only fleeting transient thought which makes it seem so. 

 

"This room is a mess" - frustration.

"Unliveable place" and "I'm an unorganized person" - discouragement and or insecurity.

"I'm too lazy to tidy it" - insecurity and or guilt.

"Too much of a hassle" - discouragement.

”Emotions are transient” - blame. 

 

11 hours ago, fopylo said:

how can I consciously create when emotions like Enthusiasm doesn't really "leave a trail behind" to transition it to good feeling thoughts even when for a split second I look at the room?

Acknowledging the emotion felt is the other-than self referential thought loops. Enthusiasm is how some thoughts feel as well, presently only. There’s no time actually passing, no actual need for a “trail left behind”. 

 

It’s about conditioning coming up and out. It’s not about a room, or controlling thoughts or emotions. 

 

The illusion of choice can be seen through by recognizing that ‘all choices’ stem from the same underlying source, and are not actually separate independent decisions but appearances within a single unfolding.

 

Observing that the thoughts about making a choice and the options themselves arise spontaneously without personal control helps dissolve the illusion.

 

Letting go of the idea of agency and recognizing that everything simply "is," without anyone actually making choices, allows for the clarity & liberation of choice being illusory to emerge naturally.

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@Phil

4 hours ago, Phil said:

"This room is a mess" - frustration.

"Unliveable place" and "I'm an unorganized person" - discouragement and or insecurity.

"I'm too lazy to tidy it" - insecurity and or guilt.

"Too much of a hassle" - discouragement.

”Emotions are transient” - blame. 

Thanks. It's not always so obvious what is the emotion. Kind of wonder though, what is meant by "guilt"?

 

4 hours ago, Phil said:

Acknowledging the emotion felt is the other-than self referential thought loops.

Right, this is in hindsight. There is the feeling of Enthusiasm (by the thoughts) and then the thought arises "my room" out of nowhere, which feels off.

 

4 hours ago, Phil said:

It’s about conditioning coming up and out. It’s not about a room, or controlling thoughts or emotions. 

 

What is conditioning, presently?

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46 minutes ago, fopylo said:

Thanks. It's not always so obvious what is the emotion. Kind of wonder though, what is meant by "guilt"?

For sure. The scale is just a tool to make it simpler, clearer & easier. Like all tools, it ‘eats itself’ inevitably. One way to look at the scale - consciousness, reality - is the top line… and a thought comes up, of conditioning, and an emotion is felt. Emotion is guidance ‘back to’ consciousness, ‘back to’ the nature of consciousness - the top line of the scale. 

 

Meaning isn’t meant by guilt. Guilt isn’t about meaning. It’s how a thought or thoughts feel. Emotion is guidance for thoughts.

 

Behind the thought by which guilt is felt, is a thought of misidentification. Like the doer not doing enough. The judge judging what was said, as if ‘where you were at’ so to speak, wasn’t, isn’t, perfection unfolding. As if there’s a ‘you’ who’s fault some thing is, or who’s at fault for some thing. A subject object thought, and, attachment. As if consciousness is finite and “in” the thoughts, or a separate entity as in “who” thoughts are about, while in fact consciousness is appearing as (thoughts). The illusory self of “self improvement” is the same illusory self of guilt. 

 

This - which is not a separate thing seen by a separate someone - is readily clear meditatively. Like a stirred muddying puddle coming to rest and naturally being clear. 

“Adhering & abandoning, adhering & abandoning… - meditation, or, meditative clear-seeing - is simultaneously an emptying of conditioning, misidentification, entangled in sensation & emotion, and seemingly entangled in perception. 

 

Illusion can be let go, but can’t be solved. Expression is letting go. A journal - any fucking journal 😅 😂 is fine! A chalkboard. A piece of coal and a paper napkin. A paint brush and a canvas. A finger & the sand. It doesn’t matter. What’s worthwhile is expression, release, relief - the true nature fills in. This page or that - who cares! It doesn’t matter - you - consciousness - matter. In a verb sense. As in are appearing. Mattering. 

 

46 minutes ago, fopylo said:

Right, this is in hindsight. There is the feeling of Enthusiasm (by the thoughts) and then the thought arises "my room" out of nowhere, which feels off.

To allow the cork to remain floating - the enthusiasm - simply appreciate, rather than degrade or demean - your room. “Your room” is being provided to you freely. You are not an entitled spoiled shithead as thought might have it. The simplest of the simplest ‘remedy’ is - thank somebody already! Appreciate! “Hey mom - fucking THANKS for looking out for me since day one - holy shit have I taken all this for granted. I thought I was actually experiencing imperfection! 🤯”. It’s not “from nowhere”. Well, it is from nowhere, but it’s from some underlying conditioning. 

 

46 minutes ago, fopylo said:

What is conditioning, presently?

Less than three minutes - no need for overthinking or conceptualizing. 

 

Less than ten minutes - no need for overthinking or conceptualizing. 

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@Phil

On 10/22/2024 at 6:56 PM, Phil said:

One way to look at the scale - consciousness, reality - is the top line… and a thought comes up, of conditioning, and an emotion is felt. Emotion is guidance ‘back to’ consciousness, ‘back to’ the nature of consciousness - the top line of the scale. 

Cool.
 

On 10/22/2024 at 6:56 PM, Phil said:

Behind the thought by which guilt is felt, is a thought of misidentification. Like the doer not doing enough. The judge judging what was said, as if ‘where you were at’ so to speak, wasn’t, isn’t, perfection unfolding. As if there’s a ‘you’ who’s fault some thing is, or who’s at fault for some thing.

Thanks for the clarification. The question was with the intention to be more aware of the emotion of guilt during the day. Coming to think of it, I experience quite a lot of guilt, all the time trying to make sure I look good in front of my higher ups, and always feel like I'm not doing/good enough and harming them indirectly.

 

On 10/22/2024 at 6:56 PM, Phil said:

The illusory self of “self improvement” is the same illusory self of guilt.

Why guilt? Explanation? I would think focusing on self improvement comes from suppressing insecurity and trying to "solve" it by looking into self improvement.

 

On 10/22/2024 at 6:56 PM, Phil said:

A journal - any fucking journal 😅 😂 is fine!

🤣🤣🤣

 

On 10/22/2024 at 6:56 PM, Phil said:

A piece of coal and a paper napkin. A paint brush and a canvas. A finger & the sand. It doesn’t matter. What’s worthwhile is expression, release, relief - the true nature fills in.

How would you define "expression"?

 

On 10/22/2024 at 6:56 PM, Phil said:

To allow the cork to remain floating - the enthusiasm - simply appreciate, rather than degrade or demean - your room

It's very hard man. It feels really off/discordant and not honest. There's a good feeling to enthusiasm, then room - discord, and then gaslighting myself so to speak.

 

On 10/22/2024 at 6:56 PM, Phil said:

The simplest of the simplest ‘remedy’ is -

Why is that?

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1 hour ago, fopylo said:

Thanks for the clarification. The question was with the intention to be more aware of the emotion of guilt during the day. Coming to think of it, I experience quite a lot of guilt, all the time trying to make sure I look good in front of my higher ups, and always feel like I'm not doing/good enough and harming them indirectly.

1 hour ago, fopylo said:

Why guilt? Explanation? I would think focusing on self improvement comes from suppressing insecurity and trying to "solve" it by looking into self improvement.

The “self” of being more aware, of a lot of guilt, the one perceived by others, which is or isn’t doing good enough, is the separate self of thoughts. The “self” which is not present. Self improvement is about improving this “self”.

 

1 hour ago, fopylo said:

How would you define "expression"?

See for yourself.

 

1 hour ago, fopylo said:

It's very hard man. It feels really off/discordant and not honest. There's a good feeling to enthusiasm, then room - discord, and then gaslighting myself so to speak.

Start smaller with appreciation & notice how taxing, exhausting, disconnective and completely unnecessary judgement is. Just be aware of it and let it pass. Consider what’s wanted - creativity, enthusiasm, etc, and question if judgement jives with what’s wanted. 

 

There seems to be some confusion about gaslighting. 

Gaslighting: Manipulate (someone) using psychological methods into questioning their own sanity or powers of reasoning. 

 

2 hours ago, fopylo said:

Why is that?

There isn’t a thought based conceptual ‘why’ answer. Appreciation is your true nature. It’s about how it feels, not concepts. Dot connecting wise, it’s the top of the scale. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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