What is Blame?

[Serenity]

Today, I found myself deeply reflecting on the emotion of "blame" and realized how it fundamentally involves judgment.

 

Blame seems to be a process of assigning fault, where judgment plays a crucial role. It involves framing something or someone as "bad" or responsible for problems and suffering, effectively turning them into a scapegoat. This judgment component is powerful because it not only identifies something or someone as the cause but also rejects or condemns them.

 

In exploring this, I see that while many emotions involve some form of judgment and influence our perspective, blame stands out for its intense focus on assigning fault. It seems particularly strong in its judgmental aspect, as it targets and externalizes responsibility in a way that can be both damaging and simplistic.

 

Self-blame is the act of holding oneself responsible for perceived negative outcomes or so called personal failures. It's a form of judgment where we turn the lens inward, attributing fault to ourselves rather than external factors.

 

Recognizing self-blame involves noticing when you're harshly criticizing yourself or assuming disproportionate responsibility for problems. It's often accompanied by feelings of guilt, shame, or inadequacy.

 

On the other hand, scapegoating involves projecting blame onto other people or external circumstances. It’s a way of deflecting responsibility from oneself or a situation by unfairly blaming others. Scapegoating simplifies complex issues by focusing blame on a convenient target, rather than acknowledging the broader context or shared responsibility.

Of course, all of this is done from the perspective of a sep self.

 

@Phil Any correction or addition? Also, any perspectives on how to heal a pattern of self-blame and how it is tied to worry?

 

 

Much love 🤍


 

[Phil]

Your post brought to mind the guy who looks at a city from above and draws it entirely and perfectly from memory. It’s like if he asked about a distinction of the city, it’d almost strike me as odd because he’s literally drawing it out perfectly, as are you with blame. You got it. It’s clearly being clarified perfectly already. 

 

What comes to mind additionally…

One small but critical ‘step’ in between emotions and perspective is interpretation. It’s the interpretation which is based on a misunderstanding of emotion, and it’s the misinterpretation therein that does or does change, and then this is reflected in perspective, which is already change / changing in any case.

 

Put slightly different to be as clear as possible, as misinterpretations are aligned the alignment is reflected in the manifestation, which is synonymous with perspective. Just like there could be endless interpretations or misinterpretations of experiential reality, there can be endless interpretations about perspective, while the nondual nature of perspective remains unchanged.

 

This highlights the worthwhileness of alignment / consciously creating, as the worthwhileness of de-contextualizing, without re-contextualizing, or ‘seeing’ what is - without adding ‘the empower’s new clothes’ upon it. Similarly, the old ‘when you are knowing & understanding, you actually don’t, and when you aren’t, you are’. 

 

8 hours ago, Serenity said:

Any correction or addition? Also, any perspectives on how to heal a pattern of self-blame and how it is tied to worry?

Your explanations of blame externalized and internalized are fantastic & clarifying. However, the theme seems to be that there is responsibility, whether there is separation such as someone responsible or not, and the conclusion seems to be focusing on an appropriate or reasonable amount of responsibility. Maybe you’re drawing out that blame is an emotion, it seems like it but idk.

 

If not, in the best, best, infinitely bestest way this can possible be heard - responsibility, the underlying principle or vehicle of externalizing or internalizing in reasonable or rational degrees, is also a house of cards with respect to blame being an emotion. It’s truly how some thoughts / interpretations feel, and nothing more.

 

There is no one responsible, nor anything no one is or could be responsible for, and there is no actuality to responsibility. Response-ability is a subjectively beautiful half step, as it highlights & emphasizes presence, spontaneity & a less obscured reality of creator-ship. 

 

8 hours ago, Serenity said:

Of course, all of this is done from the perspective of a sep self.

Again, it seems like you’re already clearly articulating this, but idk and don’t want to presume. So there’s the ol two cents. In short, the other-than the conceptual separate self route, is the acknowledgment of the emotion actually felt. As it is, said emotion dissipates ultimately no longer playing out reactively in actions & behaviors, allowing for response-ability and the more stark, intimate and immediate reality as the creator.

 

As the creator, it’s readily clear that self-blame, like self-hate, self-loathing or existential loneliness are more or less misnomers with respect to the true nature of consciousness. Self-love, self-care, self-compassion, and even self-empathy are all self hyphenated denoting the possibly presumed two is in fact already one & the same. It is because this is the case that blame can’t possibly be, truly in any way, indicative of source. It’s an absurd and inherently “unsolvable dilemma” because it wasn’t / isn’t true in the first place. Already. It isn’t true presently. 🤍

 

Wonderful thread btw. You’ve obviously been introspecting, questioning & shining the light on the direct experience of blame. Much appreciated. 🙏🏼 

 

One more distinction, if it’s clarifying… 

Thought wise, “I’m this… this or that is mine… I experience this or that thing or other, etc, etc” - these thoughts are appearing, are apparent, and are not inherently illusory. 

 

Believed, are misinterpretation, which feels slightly discordant, and this does influence and shape perception / experiential apparent reality, and this aspect is illusory (but does shape experience, which is apparent). This was discussed in the video I posted today, if interested in a bit more in depth explanation. Using this as an example of this, ‘video I posted today’ is vibrationally apparent, yet isn’t illusory. 

[Reena]

Your exploration of blame is insightful and thought-provoking. You’ve accurately pinpointed the judgmental core of blame and its destructive potential. Distinguishing between self-blame and scapegoating is crucial for understanding its various manifestations.

I agree that self-blame is often linked to worry. It can create a constant state of anxiety as we anticipate negative outcomes. To heal this pattern, I believe cultivating self-compassion is key. Challenging negative self-talk, practicing mindfulness, and setting realistic expectations can also be helpful.

It might be interesting to delve deeper into the root causes of self-blame. Are there specific beliefs or experiences that contribute to this pattern? Understanding these underlying factors could inform more targeted healing strategies.

Additionally, exploring the role of power dynamics in blame could offer further insights. How does blame often serve to maintain or shift power imbalances?

 

Let's explore further: what iz the root of blame and self blame. 

Great choice! Let's delve deeper into the complexities of blame and self-blame.

Potential areas for exploration:

Root causes of self-blame:

Early life experiences: How do childhood experiences, such as parental criticism or neglect, shape self-blame patterns? Do you think these impact? 

Cultural and societal factors: Do certain cultures or societies foster self-blame more than others?

Personality traits: Are there personality types more prone to self-blame?

Cognitive distortions: How do negative thought patterns contribute to self-blame?

The role of power dynamics in blame:

Interpersonal relationships: How does blame shift power dynamics between individuals?

Systemic blame: How is blame used to maintain or challenge power structures in society? For example how would contextualise blame in matters if systemic racism. 

Victim blaming: How does blaming victims perpetuate inequality?

Healing Self-Blame: I'm more focused on therapeutic interventions. 

Therapeutic interventions: What therapeutic approaches are effective in addressing self-blame?

Self-compassion practices: How can cultivating self-compassion help break the cycle of self-blame?

Mindfulness and meditation: What role do these practices play in reducing self-blame?

The connection between blame and worry:

Anxiety and rumination: How does self-blame contribute to anxiety and ruminative thoughts?

Procrastination and avoidance: What is the link between self-blame and these behaviors?

Breaking the cycle: How can individuals interrupt the pattern of self-blame and worry?

Would you like to focus on one of these areas, or do you have another in mind? We can also explore how these concepts intersect or influence each other.