Byron Katie’s Profoundly Simple & Incredibly Powerful Four Questions And Turnaround ‘Work’.

[Phil]

If you’ve not yet heard of & explored her teachings, here is a short introduction to ‘The Work’ of Byron Katie, from TheJoyWithin.org.

 

If you have ‘done the work’, please share how it went, what you’ve found, the impact it made in your life & relationships, and feel free to offer any insights that come to mind.

Thanks!

 

 

 

Byron Katie guides people on how to get in touch with their true nature by uncovering the layers of their psyche. She causes people who do “The Work” to fall in love with reality by getting honest with themselves. One of the most potent ways she teaches for us to view what is truly going on within our judgments and suffering is by doing turnarounds. 

 

What Is The Work?

The work is a four-step question process Katie teaches more deeply within her books. She typically guides people to perform thought inquiry through writing as it’s easier to investigate thoughts on paper. She says this is because “it is the mind’s job to be right” and when investigating thoughts within the head it can justify itself immediately. Sometimes even without us noticing. 

 

On her judge your neighbor worksheet, you write down your judgment and then put it to work. The Work is four questions that will reveal the underlying truth within your being. To reap the most benefit out of the work. It is important to be completely authentic with yourself and take time in order for your inner wisdom to come through.
 

 

The Practice:

“Every step of The Work is meditation. To begin, drop into stillness and observe what arises in the mind's eye. Now, allow The Work to work you.” - Byron Katie

 

Notice:
Who or what upsets, angers, or saddens you? Why? Recall a specific situation. 
 

Write:

Capture your stressful thoughts on a Worksheet using short, simple sentences. 
 

Question:

Isolate and question one thought - allow authentic answers to arise. 
 

Turn It Around:

Find opposites of the thought. Are these opposite thoughts as true or truer than the original thought? 

 

 

The Four Question of The Work:

1. Is it true?
2. Can I absolutely know this is true?
3. How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?
4. Who would you be without that thought?

 

After applying the work it’s time to work with turnarounds in order to get even more into the roots of what’s going on inside you. 
 

 

What Are Turnarounds?

Turnarounds are potent perspective shifts that can bring you right into the heart of the thoughts or judgments that cause suffering. They are the inquiry of the truth behind the exact opposite of a thought. This is because disappointments are always created from you, not the other person. To understand this more you need to understand that your external environment is a reflection of you. 
 

 

Here Is An Example of a Turnaround: 

Judgement:  "Paul shouldn't have lied to me"
Turnarounds: Paul should have lied to me. I lied to Paul. I lied to me.

 

Through these turnarounds, the next step is to investigate if the turnarounds are more true than the original judgment. You can turn the statements around to the opposite, to yourself, and to the other yet not all judgments will have three turnarounds.  It is okay to leave those that don’t make sense.

 

You challenge is to find 3 reasons why it is more true for each turnaround you can form. The turnarounds guide us back to the place our reality is created, in us! It is easy to think that a judgment you perceive within another person is strictly about them. Although… similar to the quote “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” - your judgments are within you.
(Judge Your Neighbor Worksheet)

 

 

Additional Information & Tools: TheWork.com.

Check Out ‘The Work’ App  ($.99) 

 

[Forza21]

I'm doing it. 🙂 

[Phil]

@Forza21 ✊🏼

[Loop]

Her book "Loving What Is" is awesome, reading her words you realize how deeply surrendered she is to What Is. Such a deeply moving read, and great questions to aid in your contemplations. ❤️

[WhiteOwl]

I'm doing it as well. There is a list of universal beliefs on her site that really hits some deep ones, as i sometimes find it hard to identify exactly which beliefs are causing a reaction. I have made a list of the ones i resonated the most with, and are working on going through all of them. For me, as someone with some previous social anxiety and a lot of approval seeking, some of the really great ones to tackle are and have been;  

 

* "I can control how other people feel about me"

* "People should respect me"

* "I don't want to look stupid"

* "I know what other people are thinking"

* "People should listen to me". 

 

Especially "people should respect me" was a great one to look into. I have always been overly-sensitive to other people and how i assumed they liked/respected me. If someone was acting not as kindly towards me as i would have liked (e.g. acting like the didn't see me), i would bubble up inside with feelings of anger/revenge among other feelings. Realizing i have no reason to believe they should, and that i cant control it, felt very empowering and freeing. It's funny something that seemed so real (if people like me, and what i think they think about me) loses a lot of its importance just because of looking into a belief. Feels like maturing.

 

 

Edited April 15, 2022 by WhiteOwl

[Phil]

13 minutes ago, WhiteOwl said:

* "I can control how other people feel about me"

* "People should respect me"

* "I don't want to look stupid"

* "I know what other people are thinking"

* "People should listen to me". 

What a powerful list. 

[BlendingInfinite]

@Phil

BK's technique makes one focus on an unwanted subject for a while. That is why I would prefer trying to let it go first.

 

What are your thoughts about that?

When is it best do use BK's approach and when just letting go or shifting focus?

[Phil]

1 hour ago, BlendingInfinite said:

@Phil

BK's technique makes one focus on an unwanted subject for a while. That is why I would prefer trying to let it go first.

 

What are your thoughts about that?

When is it best do use BK's approach and when just letting go or shifting focus?

A discordant belief which was let go, or which one is trying to let go? 

[Asayake]

This is on my to read list. I'm going to read A Course in Miracles and then this ☺️. I saw Eckhart Tolle liked the book and it was enough for me to buy it.

[BlendingInfinite]

4 hours ago, Phil said:

A discordant belief which was let go, or which one is trying to let go? 

I e.g. can just let things go, without inspecting them.

 

It doesn't seem like suppression to me, as I feel better.

 

In hindsight, I get the idea that maybe it is better to inspect, so it is more unlikely that the thoughts come back?

[Phil]

@BlendingInfinite

Sounds great. 

If a discordant thought is of the movie, and clarity is of the screen… one would have to let go of projecting discordant thoughts, to allow clarity to be once again unobscured. In hindsight, now there is something to inspect. How I ended up experiencing discord, how letting it go feels, and what I was thinking or focusing on which was discordant in the first place.

 

I’ve already caused enough trouble for one day but… if love is also the nature of the screen, and is ever present yet sometimes seemingly obscured just like clarity, the hindsight clarity could surely also include some love. 

[noomii]

@Phil

Am I supposed to question the same belief again & again until it no longer appears?

A while ago I did The work but I did not feel a shift or change and they still seem to be appearing and believed in. I've been wanting to question again but not sure if I'm doing it the wrong way.

[Phil]

@noomii

Whats the judgment (the judge your neighbor)?

[noomii]

6 minutes ago, Phil said:

@noomii

Whats the judgment (the judge your neighbor)?

It's judgement about myself. "I should be productive, I'm not good enough, I need to improve myself, there's something wrong with me, I don't have much time, I have so much to do, I should be different." 

[Phil]

@noomii

Whats the evidence? How do you know those thoughts are true? Do you know it’s true?

[noomii]

15 hours ago, Phil said:

@noomii

Whats the evidence? How do you know those thoughts are true? Do you know it’s true?

I don't know

[WhiteOwl]

16 hours ago, Phil said:

Whats the evidence?

Damn thats such a good question 😂Where is the evidence of that belief. Hits home  

[Phil]

17 hours ago, noomii said:

I should be productive

I'm not good enough

I need to improve myself

there's something wrong with me

I don't have much time

I have so much to do

I should be different." 

Do you absolutely know it’s true? 

 

Do you absolutely know - who those thoughts are actually about?

 

Do you know, with absolute certainty - that those thoughts are anything more than, thoughts?

 

Do you actually, honestly know, who those thoughts are even about?

 

Do you know, absolutely, that in spite of how those thoughts feel - you have to focus on them and believe them?

[noomii]

@Phil Honestly it feels very difficult to reflect or contemplate on any kind of questions. It feels very heavy, discordant and it takes a huge amount of energy to just reflect on one simple question. That's why I usually don't even do that. 

 

It has felt easier to repeat the belief and ask "is it true?" in meditation where I don't put in much effort and see what answer comes up effortlessly, but seeing the "No" that usually comes up does not seem to change much. 

So that's why I asked the first question about if I should keep asking in the same way in The Work.

 

 

 

[Phil]

1 hour ago, noomii said:

@Phil Honestly it feels very difficult to reflect or contemplate on any kind of questions. It feels very heavy, discordant and it takes a huge amount of energy to just reflect on one simple question. That's why I usually don't even do that. 

What feels heavy & discordant is the belief (that you are doing that, reflecting, contemplating, etc). 

 

Ask, ‘is it true’?

 

1 hour ago, noomii said:

 

It has felt easier to repeat the belief and ask "is it true?" in meditation where I don't put in much effort and see what answer comes up effortlessly, but seeing the "No" that usually comes up does not seem to change much. 

What feels heavy & discordant is the belief that the dreamer is in the subject inside the dream, and is a knower, which knows there is effort, change, etc… which knows this is not a dream.

 

Ask, ‘is it true’? 

 

1 hour ago, noomii said:

So that's why I asked the first question about if I should keep asking in the same way in The Work.

What feels heavy & discordant is the belief there are two of you; one asking the question, and a second you the questions is about.

 

Ask, ‘is it true’?

 

’Is it true’ - is about thoughts. 

 

1 hour ago, Phil said:

I should be productive

I'm not good enough

I need to improve myself

there's something wrong with me

I don't have much time

I have so much to do

I should be different." 

The belief (thought) is - there are two me’s.

 

Ask, ‘is it true’?

 

Turn it around.

I am productive.

I am Good.

I don’t have a second self which could be improved. 

I am aware of the thoughts, right & wrong.

I am aware of the thought, that there is time. 

I am aware of the thought, about a doer. 

I feel the discord of judgmental thoughts; the belief ‘I know’, I’m ‘the knower’, which ‘knows’ what others (the ‘second self’) should and shouldn’t do, how they should & shouldn’t be, what they should and shouldn’t believe, what is and isn’t good enough. 

 

It’s always ok to express appreciation rather than judgment. 

Presuming you care more about how you feel than being right / judging… it’s also ok to go by how it feels. 

 

The ‘one thought’ seems to be that you know there is good & bad. (Prior to any varying variety of judgments) 

 

 

How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?