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Mind Games


Celestial

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@Phil it would 🙂, I guess I have ideas about what universal love should feel/be like.

My experience definitely feels deeply intimate and personal, but it feels as though I'm failing to be as happy as I could be. I really want to feel completely free. Like how free can it get? 

 

I couldn't fathom what it would be like to feel completely in union with the entire universe. 

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14 hours ago, Celestial said:

@Phil it would 🙂, I guess I have ideas about what universal love should feel/be like.

It’s what is, without the conditions of the idea and shoulds. 

14 hours ago, Celestial said:

My experience definitely feels deeply intimate and personal, but it feels as though I'm failing to be as happy as I could be. I really want to feel completely free. Like how free can it get? 

Freer than personal. 

14 hours ago, Celestial said:

 

I couldn't fathom what it would be like to feel completely in union with the entire universe. 

No one could, cause no one is separate too. 

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@Phil Is everything you experience, even the seemingly insignificant things, the universe communicating to you? (You communicating to yourself I guess)

 

Is every situation I experience guidance or is the guidance the way I react to the situation? 

 

If I wrote "enlightenment" on my dreamboard, would that still work even if I don't really know what enlightenment is? Maybe writing happiness would be better so I sort of know what I'm aiming for.

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32 minutes ago, Celestial said:

@Phil Is everything you experience, even the seemingly insignificant things, the universe communicating to you? (You communicating to yourself I guess)

Being. Yes. You might say there’s only the knowing. There is no actual line or place knowing ends and those things known begin. Pure, real, magic. 

 

32 minutes ago, Celestial said:

 

Is every situation I experience guidance or is the guidance the way I react to the situation? 

Situations & reactions aren’t guidance, feeling is. 

 

32 minutes ago, Celestial said:

 

If I wrote "enlightenment" on my dreamboard, would that still work even if I don't really know what enlightenment is? Maybe writing happiness would be better so I sort of know what I'm aiming for.

Write both. When you write it on the board, it is so. ‘Aiming for’ might imply this is not the case. Allowing feels different, with respect to that guidance. 

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@Phil

It feels good to acknowledge that the universe has my back, that the universe will deliver what I am focusing on unconditionally.

2 hours ago, Phil said:

Situations & reactions aren’t guidance, feeling is. 

Sometimes I think I'm not sure what I want in the world, but I just listened to some Esther Hicks and it definitely feels exciting to become a deliberate creator and to remember who I really am. Does anyone resonate more than Esther for you? Just listening to her feels great.

2 hours ago, Phil said:

Write both. When you write it on the board, it is so. ‘Aiming for’ might imply this is not the case. Allowing feels different, with respect to that guidance. 

Allowing the universe to deliver my true desires? Not focusing on thoughts that don't feel good? Sometimes it feels like my thoughts are trying to resolve themselves, like I'm trying to work something out with thoughts by thinking similar thoughts over and over.

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39 minutes ago, Celestial said:

Does anyone resonate more than Esther for you?

No.

 

39 minutes ago, Celestial said:

Allowing the universe to deliver my true desires?

It can be what you want.

 

39 minutes ago, Celestial said:

Not focusing on thoughts that don't feel good?

Which is why some thought, that this isn’t the case, don’t feel good.

 

39 minutes ago, Celestial said:

Sometimes it feels like my thoughts are trying to resolve themselves, like I'm trying to work something out with thoughts by thinking similar thoughts over and over.

Maybe what’s attempted to be resolved is that thoughts aren’t yours, and there isn’t a thinker. If so it’d be more of a seeing what already is than something which could or needs to be resolved. Bursting the bubbles. The feeling of what is feels better unobscured, and is what was / is wanted.

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3 hours ago, Phil said:

Which is why some thought, that this isn’t the case, don’t feel good.

I'm missing this pointer 🙃

 

3 hours ago, Phil said:

Maybe what’s attempted to be resolved is that thoughts aren’t yours, and there isn’t a thinker. If so it’d be more of a seeing what already is than something which could or needs to be resolved. Bursting the bubbles. The feeling of what is feels better unobscured, and is what was / is wanted.

It definitely feels off and yucky everytime thoughts try to resolve themselves. I'm going to try to put feeling first, over wanting to think the same thought until the thought feels good (If that makes sense).

Great vid, extremely clear. I need to inspect my beliefs more! 

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Meditated for about 40 minutes, feel a lot calmer at peace. I realised how much of my awareness is caught in thought stories. Specifically about myself or the idea about myself. Meditating sometimes feels extremely uncomfortable which is a good thing because normally I wouldn't sit through those sorts of sensations and I'd distract myself by watching YouTube or entertaining thoughts that don't even feel good. Meditation definitely feels like the way. 

 

Not too sure what my stance on psychedelics is at the moment, what role they play on the path etc. I will trip in the future. Maybe for the fun of it. 

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Starting meditating a few years ago when I was about 18, practiced consistently for a while then dropped off as well for a while. In hindsight I shouldn't have dropped off but maybe it was also needed as well, to clarify my intentions and to not put so much pressure on myself to meditate. Also in hindsight, meditation is wonderful and even if it sometimes brings out boredom, struggle, and emotions that I don't like to experience, this is all for the benefit of myself and the people around me. I don't know how it works but meditation as far as I know is able to purify the mind and body, even if it is practiced for 10 minutes a day.

 

Another meditation retreat would be wonderful next year. 

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Experienced some anger today while driving. Worrying and judging what other drivers are doing. But then I realised that I created those scenarios out of thought. Pretty much fighting with myself. 

 

I have noticed recently how much I'm suffering and I sort of can't hide from it anymore because I'm more aware of it.

Sometimes it seems like everyone else is doin fine and I'm the only one with these internal battles. 

 

Writing this now I'm realising that everything I'm writing is just thoughts.

 

Realised that I probably have trauma that has never been worked through and that could be colouring my thoughts. 

 

I do notice sometimes that I create drama for no reason, almost like its some sort of hobby.

 

Music is always a haven.

 

My views on psychedelics have changed considerably. Used to believe that they were the way to "God realisation" and that meditation wasn't as powerful. 

 

Now it seems like meditation, somatic work etc is the way. 

 

 

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