About the dreamboard

[Blessed2]

@Mandy

 

It sounds to me like you're experiencing doubt in regard the dreamboard and that anything can literally be, effortlessly, just by choosing it. And trying to take a short-cut of belief and faith around the doubt... Rather than actually, empirically checking for yourself that you could in fact have anything you want. No joke, no word-play, no figure of speech, no cath 22. That Harry Potter is literally real.

 

Yeah, obviously a mansion is little fish... That is if fishing was a real thing that I can go and experience right here and now. But there is not that much experience of fishing here yet. I've mostly only heard stories. So let me just figure out the fishing part first. If I really can go out to sea and see for myself, the Big Fish will be the obvious choice, no?

 

Note that the quote goes... "A man is like a wise fisherman..." but not "A wise man is like a fisherman..." 

 

Edited December 3, 2022 by Blessed2

[Mandy]

1 hour ago, Blessed2 said:

@Mandy

 

It sounds to me like you're experiencing doubt in regard the dreamboard and that anything can literally be, effortlessly, just by choosing it. And trying to take a short-cut of belief and faith around the doubt... Rather than actually, empirically checking for yourself that you could in fact have anything you want. No joke, no word-play, no figure of speech, no cath 22. That Harry Potter is literally real.

"Harry Potter is literally real." Literally. "The word literal comes from the Latin word littera, which means letter, so when you literally go back to the origin of the word it means letter by letter, in its exact accurate sense, and literally means according to the letter of the language." https://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-17337706

 

Is Harry Potter fiction? Or is Harry Potter real? Not two. 

 

I've built mansions and I've burned them to the ground and I've stood in the foundations and spoken to the rocks left behind over 100 years later and I've experienced just as much satisfaction and wonder as I did sitting in it. "I", not physical form Mandy, though maybe she "literally" did the last part. It's so already "done" I prefer a cozy modest house. Warren Buffet never built a mansion. Why? He doesn't give a shit about mansions. If you do personally give a shit about mansions, the ironically best way to get one is to not give a shit about it. Even then you cannot lose. You cannot. The stuff I doubt is gonna be EVEN BETTER than the stuff that just falls into my lap. The more resistance I throw the better it is when it is seen through. You can't lose. 

 

Knowing that why not be more "honey badger doesn't give a shit", and more Disneyesque fantasy AT THE SAME TIME. If that isn't having your cake and eating it too, I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS. 

 

1 hour ago, Blessed2 said:

Yeah, obviously a mansion is little fish... That is if fishing was a real thing that I can go and experience right here and now. But there is not that much experience of fishing here yet. I've mostly only heard stories.

 

You've written them. You're writing them. What makes the dreamboard any more special than anything else you write? It isn't. Your expectation is. You already dreamed the damn thing into existence by aligning. Already fished it out of the cosmos. But oh no, little things are to be dismissed. Taken for granted. Looked over. God doesn't really see little or big, he doesn't even have eyes. He loves the little just as much the big, as prior to size, perspective or relativity. If you aren't appreciating the miracle of what's in front of your face, how do you expect to appreciate a mansion. You can only ever be in one room at a time you know.

1 hour ago, Blessed2 said:

If I really can go out to sea and see for myself, the Big Fish will be the obvious choice, no?

 

The Big Fish is already all there is of this or anything. The big fish is already done, already encompassing all the little fish. Sea it?

 

[Blessed2]

@Mandy ok ?

 

The mansion wasn't even the point of this thread. It was an example. You didn't catch what I was trying to say.

 

Sounds like faith or talking "how effin awesome manifestation / creation is" but not walking.

 

Edited December 3, 2022 by Blessed2

[Mandy]

@Blessed2 The not wanting to be in school is the flip side of what you do want. The mansion isn't really a mansion. What is the flip side, what DO you really want? Suss it out.

[Mandy]

You can't write down what you want and manifest it unless you know what you want first. You can literally write, "know what I want" on the dream board. It's that easy. 

[Blessed2]

Just now, Mandy said:

The not wanting to be in school is the flip side of what you do want. The mansion isn't really a mansion. What is the flip side, what DO you really want? Suss it out.

 

Freedom. The Big Fish. Obviously.

[Mandy]

@Blessed2 Freedom is the True Nature, you're inherently free. If you want circumstances to reflect that in a certain way write it down. Financial independence might be one,  "livelihood I love in which I can express myself and would rather be doing than not doing anything" might be another. 

 

How does the idea/vision of doing massage as your own practice after you're done this schooling sit with you? Does it feel like that? 

[Blessed2]

21 minutes ago, Mandy said:

How does the idea/vision of doing massage as your own practice after you're done this schooling sit with you? Does it feel like that? 

 

No.

 

If I had the guts and the fincancial independence, I'd quit. Massage therapy is pretty close but not really.

 

 

[Mandy]

@Blessed2 But quit for what? What is so calling your name that you can't even look back? 

 

My parents made me work some really boring jobs at really young ages. My dad refused to hire anyone for anything. One summer we had to screen gravel as a family because my dad wouldn't hire someone to fix our leech field, or to even buy a truck load of already screen gravel. We had to dig the gravel out and put it into buckets with a screen over them to get just the right size rocks for drainage.  In hindsight it was both really stupid, but it was also very connective and memorable. I've also done migrant labor type work harvesting food that makes you so sore you want to die after a few days  and I have so much nostalgia, I'd love to do I again for a day. I love being out in the fields all day long. Not sure if it's partly because of that background or not, but I've always felt like I could be happy doing anything.  I don't want to choose to work at McDonald's but if I did, I'm totally open to parts of it being amazingly awesome and better than parts of my dream job. All there really is is to anything is the now moment of it. Work can feel like fun at any moment. It's not a prerequisite that you love the idea of the work, but you do just have to love the work for it to not be work. 

 

 I think there's a TON of potential with massage therapy to create your own practice with reiki, acupuncture techniques and really help people heal. But maybe it isn't for you. You can line up with it, or go to something that really calls you. But you can always line up with this moment. Feel better first and then the clarity or idea can  appear. We often get that backwards. 

[Blessed2]

9 hours ago, Mandy said:

But quit for what? What is so calling your name that you can't even look back? 

 

Effortlessness... Joy...

 

Doing what I really want to do, not what I should or need to do.

 

I don't want a life and a world where there is "work". There must be more to this.

 

When I was a teenager, I noticed how my parents weren't happy, not really. There wasn't depression or drug use or anything, but they weren't shining with joy and happiness either. They just kinda went along with it, did not seem to suspect there's more to it.

 

They've been saying me the same thing they probably tell themselves... "It's just how it is. You gotta go to work."

 

Each monday they went back to work and I saw they didn't really want to do it.

 

9 hours ago, Mandy said:

 I think there's a TON of potential with massage therapy to create your own practice with reiki, acupuncture techniques and really help people heal.

 

Yeah, there is, but I really don't see massage as something I'd like to do. It doesn't fall naturally to me. Reiki just might though, but I need to try it first.

 

Resistant thoughts appear though. Reiki?! Is that really something one can do for a steady living? And especially me?! Who would pay for a session with some young dude who's not got even his own shit together?

 

[Mandy]

@Blessed2 Is there really a difference between massage and reiki? Why would reiki be something you want to do and massage not be? Reiki is not done by a person, the person acts like a straw for life energy. Doesn't matter if you have your shit together, all you have to do is empty of yourself in the practice. I personally like therapists that combine reiki, massage and different acupuncture and intuitive techniques. I'm only going to see someone every six weeks or so, and I want it all and I want someone tapped into their intuition of what to use where and when. Why couldn't massage be the path of least resistance to do reiki or energy healing? 

[Blessed2]

1 minute ago, Mandy said:

Is there really a difference between massage and reiki? Why would reiki be something you want to do and massage not be? Reiki is not done by a person, the person acts like a straw for life energy. Doesn't matter if you have your shit together, all you have to do is empty of yourself in the practice. I personally like therapists that combine reiki, massage and different acupuncture and intuitive techniques. Why couldn't massage be the path of least resistance to do reiki or energy healing? 

 

Why does everything you write trigger me now? 😂 Can't stand you omg

 

Massage is super boring. There's like a "now it begins, later it ends, and work between". It feels daunting and is physically quite heavy.

 

There's also not enough sort of intuition and flow to it. Might sound a bit nuts when talking about massage but yeah that's how I see it. It feels limited.

 

I feel like something more fundamental is a better fit for me. Massage is like an extra step. Reiki seems to go straight to the source though.

[Mandy]

34 minutes ago, Blessed2 said:

 

Why does everything you write trigger me now? 😂 Can't stand you omg

 

34 minutes ago, Blessed2 said:

Massage is super boring. There's like a "now it begins, later it ends, and work between". It feels daunting and is physically quite heavy.

 

There's also not enough sort of intuition and flow to it. Might sound a bit nuts when talking about massage but yeah that's how I see it. It feels limited.

They teach you the "rules" in school, then you get the confidence to let in your own intuition. Art is like this. Reiki is like this. Were you taught hand positions in order with reiki? I was. Is the daunting and physically heavy part of massage a resistance to exercise, moving your own body? Yes, it is really physically demanding, but exercise is also really rewarding too, especially when you can get out of your own head. When you're still learning and thinking about everything you're doing, you won't get the getting out of your own head and into the flow thing. I had no music classes when I was young, I detest reading music, learning to read music and learning to play any sort of instrument. So I never have. But I'm totally open to that being about me and my resistance, (discordant thoughts) not caused by the activity or inherent in the activity. 

 

 

[Blessed2]

36 minutes ago, Mandy said:

Is the daunting and physically heavy part of massage a resistance to exercise, moving your own body? Yes, it is really physically demanding, but exercise is also really rewarding too, especially when you can get out of your own head.

 

37 minutes ago, Mandy said:

But I'm totally open to that being about me and my resistance, (discordant thoughts) not caused by the activity or inherent in the activity. 

 

Yes, it might be my thoughts and my resistance about the activity and the school.

 

I can't get out of my head though.

 

Can't get out of my head right now.

 

I just said someone that I don't want to live. Because life seems like constant work. I tried quitting pills and it didn't work out. I need to take pills in order not to suffer immensely. I need to eat healthy food in order not to suffer immensely. I need to express in order not to suffer immensely. I need to meditate in order not to suffer immensely. I need to exercise in orden not to suffer immensely. I need to go to school in order not to suffer immensely. I need to have a job in order not to suffer immensely. I need to get out of the bed and try to do something in order not to suffer immensely. I need to try be less stubborn in order not to suffer immensely. I need to constantly try and work and just push through it with all I got in order not to suffer immensely and maybe even in order to not die.

 

That's why I said I don't want to live. I'd hope I had the words to describe what it is I feel, to get it out of my system, but I can't even succeed in that.

 

Life seems like that, like I'm stuck. Today seems like I'm stuck. It seems like I'm stuck right now, this moment.

 

I don't know what to do. Everything I've tried has failed. I don't even want to try anymore.

 

It seems that it is just impossible to get out of this pit... Which is why I said that I don't want to live, and would like to say it again.. Maybe saying it could help...

 

Then I got angry at her cause she said stuff she has said so many times before and which doesn't help. "You're stuck in your head, you need to just do something, let's do something". But my body is so heavy and tired. Not enough energy to even stand up or walk. So how can I do something? It's not my fault. It's not on me cause I don't have any control over it. I'm stuck because I just can't do even the things that would help.

 

Same with massage. It's not going to work. Happiness seems impossible.

[Phil]

@Blessed2

Google ‘suicide hotline’ and talk to someone. This forum is not a supplement for that support. Don’t wait or put it off, call now. They can help. The more expressive & forthright you are with them, the more they can help. Call and really open up. Let some of the weight go. More clarity & understanding will naturally arise the more help you allow. 

 

 

 

1 hour ago, Blessed2 said:

Happiness seems impossible.

 

1 hour ago, Blessed2 said:

I need to try be less stubborn in order not to suffer immensely

Do you understand that you are Happiness, and the suffering felt is how the beliefs held feel?

Or do you believe Happiness could or would come from somewhere or someone or a future…

… and believe it won’t, can’t or just isn’t going to for you?

 

If so, is this based on what you actually think or believe?

Or is it actually based on what you think or believe… someone else… in a future… will think or believe?

 

I have a hunch that you’re believing you are stubborn… but aren’t actually noticing, are truly not aware how you’re being stubborn. Like… ‘how it is’ or ‘how I am’, compared to ‘how what I’m believing feels’. Put another way… I don’t think you’re noticing how you’re ‘pinching yourself off’ from the happiness & unconditional love that you are. It would be one thing to be aware of how you are doing so and working on it, and another thing to actually be completely unaware how you are doing so.

[Phil]

15 hours ago, Mandy said:

"Harry Potter is literally real." Literally. 

 

[Blessed2]

@Phil Yes, I am aware that how I feel is due to thoughts and beliefs.

[Mandy]

@Blessed2 Heard this the other day and was blown away. Seems like a 180 to the "no self" approach but that's sort of the magic, because there are no 180s and if no self is a belief/standard supposedly held by a self, FUCK THAT. 

 

 

 

1 hour ago, Phil said:

 

😂😂😆

[Phil]

1 hour ago, Blessed2 said:

@Phil Yes, I am aware that how I feel is due to thoughts and beliefs.

No, that’s how the thoughts & beliefs feel. 

That is not how you feel. 

[Phil]

@Blessed2

I can’t help but suspect what you’re really wanting has nothing to do with the dreamboard, and you’re looking for the complete resolution of suffering, or, an infallible way to go.