How and why are you valid and lovable unconditionnality

[Serenity]

17 minutes ago, Blessed2 said:

And they can take psychedelics and be alright with it whereas I freak out even by the thought of it.

HAHA. I am likely going through another Ayahuasca ceremony next week. So far, all my experience were uncomfortable to say the least, and it ended up in massive purges. Buckets of trauma coming out. 

 

The shaman being like - 😳.  👀

 

😂

 

But nooooo. Phil and James123 probably would simply see and experience cool stuff and be in extasis.

 

 

Boo boo booo. Double boo, tiple boo.

[Serenity]

22 minutes ago, James123 said:

Let me give you a hint, every morning when you wake up, in your first breath, let the air talk to you, just breathe, it will talk. If it does talk before your mind, all will be good 😊

 

All I here is blabla blablabla, i'm so perfect. 

 

🤣

What about you @Blessed2. Does James deserve a special little gif ? 😂

[Phil]

For sure. Total rip off. I’d blame whatever, whoever and whyever for all the doubt & worry experienced. It’s utterly unacceptable. 

[Blessed2]

21 minutes ago, Serenity said:

HAHA. I am likely going through another Ayahuasca ceremony next week. So far, all my experience were uncomfortable to say the least, and it ended up in massive purges. Buckets of trauma coming out. 

 

 

I took only a bunch of shrooms and had a total psychological crisis, had to call an ambulance and spend some time in psych ward. In my diagnosis records there's literally "acute psychosis due to hallucinogen use" 😂😂

[Serenity]

1 minute ago, Blessed2 said:

 

I took only a bunch of shrooms and had a total psychological crisis, had to call an ambulance and spend some time in psych ward. In my diagnosis records there's literally "acute psychosis due to hallucinogen use" 😂😂

😂

 

Oh my! I'm so sorry you had that experience. Looks pretty terrible.

29 minutes ago, Phil said:

For sure. Total rip off. I’d blame whatever, whoever and whyever for all the doubt & worry experienced. It’s utterly unacceptable. 

Look at Phil. He wants us to evolve so we stop targeting him with our jealousy. Trying to get us angry. Grr.

 

Boo 😒. Grrr 😡. Booo 😒. GRR 😡. 😒😠😤 🙄

 

😂

 

[Phil]

Yeah. So disappointing.  

[Joseph Maynor]

On the one hand you want to accept yourself as you are (the feminine).  On the other hand you want to have ideas you use to create plans to move yourself into a more ideal you (the masculine).  The ends of the idealism vs. acceptance duality work with each other, there's no exclusive or privileging one above and over the other.  If you privilege acceptance over idealism, that's the feminine being channeled through the masculine.  That's limited too!  It's partial and doubled-down like the masculine but it has a feminine flavor/twist.  The feminine is not so rigidly adhering to ideas/ideology but is open and lets things crystalize as they do.  But the masculine is always trying to line things up and create visions about how things can become better.  Acceptance alone is not the whole answer.  That's too much of a stake in the ground.  That's the feminine being channeled through the masculine.  It's the masculine that appears like the feminine but is not.

Edited November 24, 2022 by Joseph Maynor

[Serenity]

5 minutes ago, Joseph Maynor said:

On the one hand you want to accept yourself as you are (the feminine).  On the other hand you want to have ideas you use to create plans to move yourself into a more ideal you (the masculine).  The ends of the idealism vs. acceptance duality work with each other, there's no exclusive or privileging one above and over the other.  If you privilege acceptance over idealism, that's the feminine being channeled through the masculine.  That's limited too!  It's partial and doubled-down like the masculine but it has a feminine flavor/twist.

 

But I already met the 'ideal' me. When I got an ego transcendence experience. The perfect me, is the actuality of who I am without mind identification. So the 'ideal' is just what I am. And this version of myself is greater than anything that can be conceptualized.  🙂

 

A thought of a future self, as magnificent as it would be, would  just be a very pale copy of 'being it'. 😄

[Blessed2]

38 minutes ago, Phil said:

Yeah. So disappointing.  

 

It is. I tried expressing, being open, and nothing helps. Still the same pessimism, same uncertainty, life still feels like a grey burden, like it has felt for a long time. I still have no fucking idea what to do and what's the right choice.

[Phil]

I definitely hear ya on nothing’s working. That can be very overwhelming and frustrating to say the least. 

[Blessed2]

5 minutes ago, Phil said:

I definitely hear ya on nothing’s working. That can be very overwhelming and frustrating to say the least. 

 

Yeah, it is. It's the same each time. Nothing works, nothing gets better, and every time it's back to the same rut. What's the point? It's impossible to get better. Mission impossible. Everything in life is just bullshit. Such a let-down this whole thing. No hope for a better tomorrow cause this is just how it is now. This expression won't work either, it's just gonna be the same shit nonetheless.

[Serenity]

21 minutes ago, Blessed2 said:

 

It is. I tried expressing, being open, and nothing helps. Still the same pessimism, same uncertainty, life still feels like a grey burden, like it has felt for a long time. I still have no fucking idea what to do and what's the right choice.

It's the powerlessness. Feeling stuck. It's really horrible. 

 

I try to feel the powerlessness and the impression I'll always be 'stuck'. Your thoughts are lying to you.  Phil probably also had thoughts telling him nothing would work for him. 

 

15 minutes ago, Phil said:

I definitely hear ya on nothing’s working. That can be very overwhelming and frustrating to say the least. 

You've also been there at some point. Isn't it? It's possible to get out of it.

Edited November 24, 2022 by Serenity

[Mandy]

I have a really weird suggestion. Read some Calvin and Hobbes, then do some journaling. I read it a lot as a kid and that's the best way or analogy I can describe letting yourself blow up and knowing it's ok, it's creation, it's constructive, and being able to laugh and loving yourself anyway. Sort of realize it's about loving the anger like you love Calvin and letting it come out and have a voice. At the same time contemplation, questioning, humor and curiosity are happening without effort. 

 

https://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/1986/04/21

 

 

[Phil]

15 minutes ago, Blessed2 said:

 

Yeah, it is. It's the same each time. Nothing works, nothing gets better, and every time it's back to the same rut. What's the point? It's impossible to get better. Mission impossible. Everything in life is just bullshit. Such a let-down this whole thing. No hope for a better tomorrow cause this is just how it is now. This expression won't work either, it's just gonna be the same shit nonetheless.

 

14 minutes ago, Serenity said:

It's the powerlessness. Feeling stuck. It's really horrible. 

 

I try to feel the powerlessness and the impression I'll always be 'stuck'. Your thoughts are lying to you.  Phil probably also had thoughts telling him nothing would work for him. 

 

You've also been there at some point. Isn't it? It's possible to get out of it.

Yes, seemed like nothing was going to work out. I also found it impossible to get out of. 

[Serenity]

7 minutes ago, Mandy said:

I have a really weird suggestion. Read some Calvin and Hobbes, then do some journaling. I read it a lot as a kid and that's the best way or analogy I can describe letting yourself blow up and knowing it's ok, it's creation, it's constructive, and being able to laugh and loving yourself anyway. Sort of realize it's about loving the anger like you love Calvin and letting it come out and have a voice. At the same time contemplation, questioning, humor and curiosity are happening without effort. 

 

https://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/1986/04/21

 

 

Oh, that's a great idea. Thank you. I need to get my hands on some Calvin and Hobbes though.

[Serenity]

5 minutes ago, Phil said:

 

Yes, seemed like nothing was going to work out. I also found it impossible to get out of. 

Somewhat, knowing this really helps.  Cool you confirmed it. It really brings hope and seem to dissipate the cloud for now.

[Mandy]

3 minutes ago, Serenity said:

Oh, that's a great idea. Thank you. I need to get my hands on some Calvin and Hobbes though.

You can read a lot of it online for free these days. 

[Serenity]

6 minutes ago, Mandy said:

You can read a lot of it online for free these days. 

Sweet Mandy, are you incentivizing me to become a pirate?

 

😂

 

 

(will look, that's actually a great tip)

Edited November 24, 2022 by Serenity

[Phil]

17 minutes ago, Serenity said:

Somewhat, knowing this really helps.  Cool you confirmed it. It really brings hope and seem to dissipate the cloud for now.

Yeah, there was lots of pessimism before the sweet relief of boredom. 

[Mandy]

It's the Rick Roll of the emotional scale.

 

I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling.

 

 

Gotta make you.

 

 

Understand.