Dealing with anxiety and trauma

[Mandy]

@nurthur11 Good for contemplation? If our own thoughts are poison, other's encouraging words can seem like the antidote. The wisest thing is to stop eating the poison. Maybe look into some of Louise Hay's affirmations and write down some that really hit you. https://www.louisehay.com/101-best-louise-hay-positive-affirmations/#:~:text=am at peace.-,Loving others is easy when I love and accept myself,members just as they are.

[Phil]

17 minutes ago, nurthur11 said:

@Philyour saying to assume that everything is fine with myself and try to figure out life from that. All states are fine, self is inconceivable. 

 

Smth like this? 

Is there a you and a myself such that a you could assume everything is fine with a myself?

I’m not suggesting to assume anything, just pointing to what is already actually the case. 

Yes, of course all states are fine and yes self is inconceivable, therein there aren’t actually any states, nor that myself. 

[nurthur11]

53 minutes ago, Phil said:

Is there a you and a myself such that a you could assume everything is fine with a myself?

I’m not suggesting to assume anything, just pointing to what is already actually the case. 

Yes, of course all states are fine and yes self is inconceivable, therein there aren’t actually any states, nor that myself. 

 

Hmmm 🤔 

 

I am not sure how to reply. I believe there is a me. I can hear my voice.  I can see myself?

How would you investigate “what is actually the case” ? 
 

1 hour ago, Mandy said:

Good for contemplation? If our own thoughts are poison, other's encouraging words can seem like the antidote. The wisest thing is to stop eating the poison. Maybe look into some of Louise Hay's affirmations and write down some that really hit you. https://www.louisehay.com/101-best-louise-hay-positive-affirmations/#:~:text=am at peace.-,Loving others is easy when I love and accept myself,members just as they are.

 

Thank you 🙏 

 

 

[Phil]

1 hour ago, nurthur11 said:

I am not sure how to reply. I believe there is a me. I can hear my voice.  I can see myself?

But is there me and a myself… such that me could assume myself is fine? 

Where is the myself spoken of? 

 

1 hour ago, nurthur11 said:

How would you investigate “what is actually the case” ? 

How are you distinguishing my voice vs… me? 

[nurthur11]

6 hours ago, Phil said:

But is there me and a myself… such that me could assume myself is fine? 

Where is the myself spoken of? 

 

How are you distinguishing my voice vs… me? 

I am hearing my voice - the me is before my voice. This me it cannot be pointed. 
 

Ok, I understand what you are saying but i did not adopt this belief yet. In my belief me is the sense of having likes and not likes, specific mood, personality traits. 

[Phil]

@nurthur11

Are you aware of like & dislikes, moods, personality traits?

Or do you have them?

[nurthur11]

8 hours ago, Phil said:

@nurthur11

Are you aware of like & dislikes, moods, personality traits?

Or do you have them?

You got me here. I am aware. 💡 

[Phil]

@nurthur11 

Likewise, are you, awareness, in a state of anxiety?

Do you, awareness, get anxious?

Do you have fear?

 

 

 

[nurthur11]

31 minutes ago, Phil said:

@nurthur11 

Likewise, are you, awareness, in a state of anxiety?

Do you, awareness, get anxious?

Do you have fear?

 

 

 

No I am Bardhi - feeling fear. I am aware that I can feel anxious at time.

 

I don't have fear. Your right.  Fear has me.

[Phil]

@nurthur11
What, other than awareness, is aware?

[nurthur11]

2 hours ago, Phil said:

@nurthur11
What, other than awareness, is aware?

Me!

[Phil]

@nurthur11

You’re aware that there is a me which is aware?

[nurthur11]

38 minutes ago, Phil said:

@nurthur11

You’re aware that there is a me which is aware?

No i am not. Ok i see, and it feels better (less discordant) you are right. 

[Phil]

13 minutes ago, nurthur11 said:

No i am not. Ok i see, and it feels better (less discordant) you are right. 

 

🙂

 

 

What would your answers be to your questions now?

On 11/22/2022 at 3:24 PM, nurthur11 said:

I am constantly in a state of anxiety. This is mostly happening when others critique me or if i think my future is in peril.
 

Is this self induced? 
 

An example would be if you say i am doing bad at my work then i think my career is at stake so i get anxious. Eventually and quickly i get traumatized. How do i let go of this fear and the associated everything that comes along with it? 
 

How do i find and learn more about myself? I am generally a very simple guy but i think i am complex. Why have i not noticed myself yet. This is weird. 

 

[Sunrise]

I can relate. One thing that has helped me is to get into a mind state in which I am a detached observer of the thoughts and feelings that appear. Breathwork is the best tool to ease me into this state. A mini dose of a psychedelic + breathwork/contemplation/nature can also be helpful. Its helped reveal insights into underlying dynamics and how my mind + collective mind creates these dynamics. 

[Cathal]

On 11/22/2022 at 8:24 PM, nurthur11 said:

I am constantly in a state of anxiety. This is mostly happening when others critique me or if i think my future is in peril.
 

Is this self induced? 
 

An example would be if you say i am doing bad at my work then i think my career is at stake so i get anxious. Eventually and quickly i get traumatized. How do i let go of this fear and the associated everything that comes along with it? 
 

How do i find and learn more about myself? I am generally a very simple guy but i think i am complex. Why have i not noticed myself yet. This is weird. 

 

Stop reacting to it and see it as impersonal, a condition you were conditioned into. If you struggle with it, try to fix it, change it you will not let go. Letting go is to stop reacting, to be mindful when it arises, to stop trying to defend yourself and let go of controlling what is out of your control. Let go and you will see in time, it won't hit you as much

[nurthur11]

1 hour ago, Cathal said:

 

Stop reacting to it and see it as impersonal, a condition you were conditioned into. If you struggle with it, try to fix it, change it you will not let go. Letting go is to stop reacting, to be mindful when it arises, to stop trying to defend yourself and let go of controlling what is out of your control. Let go and you will see in time, it won't hit you as much

I did do this and I stopped noticing anxiety completely until today when I got a panic attack and realized what i said to my collogues was completely dumb. I went out for a walk and felt better at it - I am very bad at not reacting but I can see your point.

[nurthur11]

On 11/26/2022 at 5:31 PM, Sunrise said:

I can relate. One thing that has helped me is to get into a mind state in which I am a detached observer of the thoughts and feelings that appear. Breathwork is the best tool to ease me into this state. A mini dose of a psychedelic + breathwork/contemplation/nature can also be helpful. Its helped reveal insights into underlying dynamics and how my mind + collective mind creates these dynamics. 

Breathwork worked for me when in fight or flight but sometimes I can over breath so like a balance of control breathwork and let it happening by itself.

[Cathal]

12 hours ago, nurthur11 said:

I did do this and I stopped noticing anxiety completely until today when I got a panic attack and realized what i said to my collogues was completely dumb. I went out for a walk and felt better at it - I am very bad at not reacting but I can see your point.

It's a practice you will spend time developing and it's especially tough to get the ball rolling, but i have done it and seen myself transform, there's many things you can also do to lets say give support to your non-reactivity, it was actually at the core of how the Buddha taught anapanasati, to introduce the gladenning of the mind - to actively relax bodily sensations that arise, it is not an aversion but completely facing it and relaxing it, you are taking control - it transforms the habit of tensing up with anxiety which only aggrevates and prolongs it, the more you surrender to what arises and let things be the way they are, over time you will see a radical transformation

 

[nurthur11]

6 minutes ago, Cathal said:

It's a practice you will spend time developing and it's especially tough to get the ball rolling, but i have done it and seen myself transform, there's many things you can also do to lets say give support to your non-reactivity, it was actually at the core of how the Buddha taught anapanasati, to introduce the gladenning of the mind - to actively relax bodily sensations that arise, it is not an aversion but completely facing it and relaxing it, you are taking control - it transforms the habit of tensing up with anxiety which only aggrevates and prolongs it, the more you surrender to what arises and let things be the way they are, over time you will see a radical transformation

 

Thank you very much for this response. It sounds very promising - I am out of hope, especially today.

 

How do you suggest to do the practice? Is it like a mindfulness practice?