DefinitelyGettingOutOfThis

@Phil Okay, perhaps I should rephrase that. If you could literally predict the future, then you would be a multi-billionaire. Imagine knowing that buying Bitcoin in 2010 knowing it'll make you rich So what I mean is, we have the ability to predict what may happen in the future. For example if you were to rob a bank, you can make the reasonable prediction that you're going to jail after committing the act. Sure, you may not know with absolute certainty, but you know that it is likely that you will go to jail. Hahaha! Just learned something new in a way I wouldn't have expected Thanks. Well yes I am aware that they are thoughts. But are thoughts always unhelpful? Thoughts about the past, self, and future, can be helpful right?

@Phil Yes, of course. Our ability to predict the future is what keeps us alive. Let's take the scenario of a bear running towards you. Normally, when you see a bear running towards you, you instinctively make the prediction that if you don't run away, it will maul you and kill you. Now, let's say that you don't have the ability to predict the future. When you see a bear running towards you, you will be completely unconcerned, idly sitting there while watching the bear rush towards you. Before you know it, you're dead. I've journaled about it multiple times but I don't feel like I am getting anywhere. I am just repeating the same thoughts, or thoughts that are similar in structure, over and over again. How do I get out of this repetitive thought loop?

@Phil I don't understand. A letting go of what? And isn't "letting go" also a "doing"? I really hope so. Thanks for your encouragement. Okay here is what I am thinking. "I am feeling worry. I am feeling fear. I don't want to feel worry or fear. I want to feel good. I want to live the best life possible." It doesn't feel like anything is clicking. If it's not about results, then what is it about? What is alignment? How do I become "aligned"? How do I do "aligning"? Yes you are right. They are discordant thoughts about other people. I have trust issues. I feel like I can't trust anyone. When you trust someone, whoever you are trusting always has the ability to break that trust and screw you over. How do I bring attention to the present and what I am doing now? I can't feel any release for some reason. I just feel dead inside. Thanks. This one right? "The Unseeable Iceberg & Expression: How It All Coming Apart - Is Actually It All Coming Together" I've finished reading it, and I felt like I had to put a lot of effort into deciphering what you wrote, what the message is, and I still couldn't fully understand/comprehend it. Maybe I can give this off as feedback to make your writing more clearer? Usually, the easier it is to for the reader to understand, the better. Or perhaps it is clear and it's just going over my head. I don't know. Can you elaborate more on this analogy? I don't quite get it but I think it is leading somewhere.

@Phil How do I accept that I could die, go to prison for something I didn't do, lose everything in my life, at any time in the future? All of the hard work I'd be putting in everyday would be for nothing. By the way, I no longer have any thoughts about gore. I can't even remember the last time I had any thoughts about gore, almost as if I forgot it existed and it left my mind. However, now that I read the word "gore", it sparked some memories of it, but it doesn't have as strong of a hold on me. If I start following this train of thought I will be worse off, so I need to distract myself from these thoughts about gore immediately. But my thoughts about paranoia still haven't gone away. I am still paranoid a lot. @Mandy What is Alignment? So my dreamboard is actually just a digital note. I don't have a dry erase board to use as a dreamboard. It's supposed to be a dry erase board right? @Phil Can you please confirm? Exactly. In fact I'd wager that they're one in the same. I don't feel like I am "me". I don't feel like I have my personality. I am not as interested in the things I used to be interested in. This makes a lot of sense and I can see how this may be the case for a lot of people, but this one in particular just doesn't apply to me. When I care about what people think, it's not because I fear they will judge me for being who I am, it's because I fear they will screw me over and ruin my life in some way. Just because any person close to you can screw up your life doesn't mean they will, but my mind fixates on the mere possibility. However, when I did still have my personality, before my health issues started, I didn't fully express what I wrote on my dreamboard, because I thought that most of the things I had written on my dreamboard were a distraction from Enlightenment and Emotional Mastery. Some of the things I wanted were a luxury car (which I don't really care about now), a ripped physique, a luxury mansion – the usual Stage Orange stuff that most people in Stage Orange want. But these are distractions from Enlightenment, Health, and Emotional Mastery which is what I most wanted.

Thank you. I think I just have an attachment to "knowing" and certainty. Certainty is what the ego wants. How do I let go of "knowing" and be comfortable with uncertainty? I just finished watched that video. That is so interesting. This guy is super attractive... I don't quite understand what the difference between fear and worry is. What is the difference? They both give the feeling of fear, right? The issue is that I feel apathetic, and have completely lost interest in all the things I used to be extremely passionate about. I've been diagnosed with depression and have been put on antidepressants that only made me feel worse, so I've just been trying other things to get rid of this depression. I put stuff on a dreamboard before this apathy and depression started, so I've just been trying to pursue those things anyway; live as if I am in touch with myself even if it isn't enjoyable and I don't feel like I am in touch with myself. I have tried multiple diets to see if they help; paleo, autoimmune paleo (AIP), keto, carnivore. While I feel best on carnivore, nothing seems to get rid of this apathy and depression. As for caffeine, I have it extremely rarely. Maybe a few times throughout an entire year.

Yes. The future and past are just thoughts and imaginations in our head. But we need to be able to make predictions of the "future" in order to survive right? Thank you. I just bought the app as soon as I read this and it seems really promising. I appreciate the recommendation. But, I need some help with this part. Look at how it would look if I followed that advice: "I am willing to go to prison." "I look forward to going to prison." How in the world am I ever going to "look forward to going to prison" and be "willing to go to prison"??? Imagine you get 20 years in prison for a crime you didn't commit (like what happened to my uncle), how the hell are you ever going to look forward to that? So that's what the emotion "worry" stems from right? Doubting whether reality can really be what's on my dreamboard? I don't understand. Can you please elaborate?

@Orb What's your job/career? What's your schedule?

@Eothasian What? I don't get it. Some thoughts or scenarios we have in our head might not be true right now, but they could be true in the future right? It could always happen. For example the thought of getting "falsely accused" isn't true right now, but it could always happen in the future, making it true. I've seen it happen with my dad and uncle. It could happen to me too in the future. Just an accusation by itself, even if it's completely false and doesn't have any validity, can mess up your reputation and opportunities. By "Out" you mean "Write out" right? So doubt is me doubting whether I can actually get the things that are on my dreamboard? Okay, right. Focusing on what other people are doing with their lives and how their position seems to be better is an illusion and a distraction. @Mandy Thanks. Okay I see. For me it's paranoia. It's an endless cycle. As soon as I stop being paranoid about one particular thing my mind just moves onto being paranoid about another thing. Or what happens is that it starts getting paranoid about a new thing so it forgets about how it was paranoid about something else the previous week. So my mind has practiced thinking thoughts of paranoia. How do I stop thinking "more of the same"?

@Mandy Okay I see. So if the planning and strategizing you're doing feels good to you, then you are on the right track, and you are aligned with Infinite Intelligence? What do you mean by "always bring more of the same."? Would you say the ideal scenario is to be so engrossed in what you're creating that you lose yourself in your creating, such that you wouldn't even care if you died because your creativity transcends yourself (selfishness) and is more for the betterment of others (selflessness)? @Phil But how can you check whether the thoughts you are having are actually true? How do you check to see if your thoughts are true? The next is worry and then it's doubt. What is doubt exactly? I don't really know what I doubt and what I am doubting. What questions can I ask to uncover what I am doubting? What does that mean?

I know the past is the past and it is completely out of my control. But when I do something recently and I regret it, how do I stop thinking these thoughts? The thing I am dwelling over currently is; I was in a group photo (professionally taken) with a bunch of people, and now that photo is out in public and posted to a bunch of accounts. I don't like having photos of me posted online because of privacy reasons. In fact, there wasn't a single photo of me online before this one. The reason why I am worried about this is because I used to post content online + had a following, and am worried about people doxxing me or trying to reveal my face and link it to my online alias. Doxxing (or doxxing attempts) happens to online influencers a lot more often than you would think. Now this photo is out there, and there is not much I can do about it. Once something is on the internet, it is immortalized. It is permanently out there. So I have been having this looping thought pattern of "I should have just walked away instead of giving in to the peer pressure of taking a photo" and I keep trying to control the situation by asking the few people I know in the photo to take the pictures of me down on their account. But that won'd do much because the photo of me is still on the photography company's website. Goes to show that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Had I simply not taken any photos that night I wouldn't be in this situation.

@Phil I pondered some more and this is what I'm thinking. I think it aligns with what you say: I noticed a pattern with the thoughts that bring me so much suffering: "What if I go to jail for something I didn't do?" "What if my reputation gets tarnished?" "This person probably thinks this about me." "I am worried about ever trying psychedelics because I am worried that I could get caught for possessing them." These are all thoughts about "me". These thoughts are inherently selfish, because they are trying to serve the survival of "me", and trying to avoid causing "me" suffering (which ironically is itself what is causing "me" suffering). On the other hand, shifting my thoughts from inwards (me) to outwards (creating and doing meaningful work for the betterment of others and mankind) seems like a better approach. I am not in touch with my emotions enough to feel a feeling of relief from this shift, but maybe I will as I do more of this work. At the end of the day, maybe my fears could happen in reality, even if they're unlikely, but am I really going to let worries and paranoia stop me from contributing the gifts that Infinite Intelligence has given me to others? Perhaps if I "lose myself to the service of others", putting other's need before my own selfish survival concerns and fears, then I will not have much of a "self", "I", "me", to defend and protect. Maybe in this way, counterintuitively, the highest selfishness is selflessness. It goes full-circle.

I can't find something I'm jealous of for these people in particular. I pity them actually. Most of them are either addicted to video games or drink alcohol every day. However, I have found people that I am jealous of (via the Emotional Scale you talked about) and they are people online, not people I know in person. I am jealous of them because they look like they are living awesome lives. So you are right in that it is relieving to shift from inward to outward. I want to be around like-minded people who bring me up and are better/more successful than I am. I want to find a group where I am initally the dumb one. Probably the things on my dreamboard, which I am still in the process of creating. But these intrusive thoughts have such a strong pull that they deter me from the things on my dreamboard.

I don't want to talk to them. I compulsively talk to them. They are dragging my development down. It feels like they are crabs in a bucket. I don't hate them or anything, it's their choice what they want to do with their life, I just don't want to be around them. This makes sense. Lately I have been saying "GET OUT OF MY HEAD". Is that also not an attempt to create anything / change? I feel so stuck in my head that I say that a lot. What I don't want is "Overthinking". What is the opposite of "Overthinking", @Phil ? Thank you. I believe you by the very fact you put in the effort to respond to my posts and others' posts. I want to be selfless like that too.

Fucking terrible. It just makes me anxious and worrisome. I keep thinking "What if they say try to tarnish my reputation and go tell the cops I did something that I didn't actually do?" I keep thinking this thought even though it is not serving me. My mind is making me think that the worst possible outcomes will happen. It's so neurotic. I really want to get rid of this and just let things go. I want to listen to feeling, but my mind comes up with some type of rationalization to think more e.g. "Wait, but you might go to prison if you're not cautious enough and you just let things go." I sometimes wish I never saw stories of people going to prison because their partner accused them of sexually abusing them or doing any other criminal activity that the person didn't actually do. It's implanted the seed in my mind and now my mind keeps on perpetuating the cycle of worrying about that. I want to feel great. But I am finding it so hard to let go of my thoughts. They just keep on coming back. But we use thoughts to strategize and be cautious in our life right? Like we are careful about not doing certain things like certain things like going way above the speed limit with a car because of the thought of "If I go way above the speed limit then I will get a ticket and even go to jail if it is very much above the speed limit" Thanks. So will focusing more on what I do want make me eventually forget about what I don't want? And I think that worrying so much about something doesn't make it any less likely for it to happen. It just makes me feel worse. If it happens, it happens.

No, I haven't. It is true that I haven't. But don't we use thoughts to survive in this life? How will we make plans and strategies for our life without thoughts (e.g. strategizing about how to achieve Financial Freedom).